Colton Haynes Officially Comes Out

Previous post on this blog have looked at Colton Haynes' past flirtations with gay modeling and his suggestion more recently that he might actually be gay.  Now, Haynes has made it official and confirmed that, yes, he is gay, and that he has been "out" to family and friends for some time.  I congratulate Haynes on finally making it official.  Having first lived in the closet for decades myself and then lived in the closet at work, words truly do not describe the weight one feels lifted from them once the hiding and secrecy are needed no more.  I wish Haynes happiness as he now lives an authentic life.  One of his comments that I touched a cord with me - he talked about having to act 24/7.  I described my years in the closet as living as "an actor on a stage."   Interesting that an actor would use the same analogy.  Here are highlights from an interview article in Entertainment Weekly:

If you don’t know Colton Haynes by name – and he’d be the first person to bashfully tell you, you probably don’t – you at least know the 27-year-old actor by his familiar Hollywood fable: farm boy turned New York model turned aspiring Los Angeles actor, a paragon of the digital age of the Instagrammable hunk, a slab of innocent Kansas marble sculpted by MTV and polished by The CW.

He’s a teen heartthrob and a fast-rising one at that, thanks to two major roles: His life-changing debut in 2011 as slithering jock Jackson Whittemore on MTV’s runaway hit Teen Wolf, and his series regular gig on The CW’s Arrow as hooded vigilante Arsenal. Both roles made him digital teen royalty, bolstered by Haynes’ decided effort to embrace and interact with fans and his eccentric social media savviness (somewhere to the tune of some 4-million Instagram followers).

So why, then, would a rising prince of teen genre walk away from two red-hot TV gigs – arguably at their own peaks, and on the cusp of his own – and all but abdicate the throne?

“I asked to step away because I cared more about my mental and physical health than my career at the time,” the actor tells EW, opening up about his personal and professional life for the first time in quite some time. “I’ve had terminal anxiety my entire life. Physically ill, fainting. I’m 27 years old, and I have an ulcer. I had to step back.” Clinical anxiety and public pressure are a potent mix, but their effects may be worse for someone like Haynes – a gentle spirit in a threatening (or so he’s been told by many a casting director) build, someone who lost control of his own personal narrative somewhere along the way between Kansas and California.

Social media afforded a temporary way to maintain his public voice after his departure from Arrow in 2015, . . . But while social media has helped his career, it’s also gotten him into some trouble. Case in point: A Tumblr post in January sparked an Internet firestorm after a fan commented on Haynes’ “secret gay past,”regarding racy modeling photos Haynes took while underage. Without giving it much thought, Haynes offered a coy reply: “Was it a secret?” The comment was picked up by bloggers as his coming out – but it wasn’t. Not yet.

“It was a complete shock. I wasn’t ready to be back in the headlines,” says Haynes, who is in fact gay but has never publicly addressed his sexuality (and, like many others on his path, took advice early in his career to subdue it). “I should have made a comment or a statement, but I just wasn’t ready. I didn’t feel like I owed anyone anything. I think in due time, everyone has to make those decisions when they’re ready, and I wasn’t yet. . . . .  He had checked into rehab for anxiety and would be frequently back in the hospital over the next three months.

“People want you to be that GQ image that you put out, but people don’t realize what it’s like to act 24 hours a day. I’d go home and I was still acting,” he says gently. “People who are so judgmental about those who are gay or different don’t realize that acting 24 hours a day is the most exhausting thing in the world.” The truth is, Haynes has been out for most of his life – in high school, to his family and friends, to his cast members, to his Hollywood bosses (like Arrow creator Greg Berlanti, now one of his closest mentors). But as a green transplant in Hollywood in 2006, he wasn’t any more immune to the town’s well-chronicled discomfort with LGBT identity.

Now, however, there’s a palpable energy around him, a positivity that gushes from a 27-year-old eager to start not just a new chapter, but perhaps a new book. He’s setting his eye on movies, on comedy, on theater and photography and music – all passions he’s keen to explore as a version nothing less than himself. 

If his cyber clash with his own identity earlier this year forced him to take stock of his life, its after-effects are now on the positive upswing. “It took me so long to get to this point, but I’m doing so good,” says Haynes. “I’m happier than I’ve ever been, and healthier than I’ve ever been, and that’s what I care about.”

No one should have to live in the closet like an actor 24/7 - especially when the need to do so stems solely from religious based ignorance and bigotry and the refusal of many, especially evangelical Christians, to move into the modern world and let go of brainwashing they received as children.  Again, kudos to Colton Haynes.

Jussie Smollett Discusses Why He Needed to "Come Out"

In this area, other than the lunatics over at Pat Robertson's CBN outfit, no one is more homophobic than the black pastor crowd who allow themselves to be regularly manipulated by the Christofascists and white supremacists at The Family Foundation, Virginia's leading hate group.  Thus, it is timely that someone like Empire star, Jussie Smollett come out and help dispel some of the batshitery peddled by the "godly folk," including the black pastors fanning homophobia - and increasing the number of men "on the down low" - as they shake down their parishioners for money.  Smollett discusses his reason for coming out in a piece in Variety.  Here are highlights:

Earlier this week, “Empire” actor Jussie Smollett confirmed that he’s gay in a backstage interview with Ellen DeGeneres, saying, “There’s never been a closet that I’ve been in.” Smollett told Variety that the reaction since that moment has been great.

“It was a bigger deal to everyone than it was for me,” he said. “But at the same time I do understand why it is something to talk about.”

Smollett said he hopes to use the platform as a way to make other people feel less alone, and re-emphasized that his personal life is off-limits.

“I didn’t talk to Ellen so that people could, be like ‘oh my God, let’s see what Jussie does in his bedroom in his private life.’ But I did talk to her so that people understood that they’re not alone. That’s all.”

Smollett’s character on “Empire,” Jamal Lyon, who is also gay, explores the issues associated with being homosexual, including his tense relationship with his father. Smollett says getting to play his character is one of the most beautiful experiences of his life.

“You don’t always get these experiences as an artist of [playing] roles where you feel the impact of what you’re doing, but I do. And that as an artist, as an activist, as a man, it’s feeding my soul.”

Being "out" and living your life is the best way to end homophobia.  Other than the die hard haters and religious fanatics, once people have a face and name and someone they know to dispel the hate-filled stereotypes our enemies disseminate, it becomes more difficult to hang onto prejudices. 

Quote of the Day: Anne Rice on Christian Bigots

Time and time again we see anti-gay hate and bigotry spewed by far right Christians who try to justify their horrible conduct under the smoke screen of "sincerely held religious belief."   It is little different than the hate and bigotry demonstrated by white Southerners in the past - and in some circles today - who used the Bible to justify behavior that ought to be unconscionable among decent people.  Yesterday, on her Facebook page author Anne Rice congratulated actress Ellen Page for her courage in coming out as gay.  Not surprisingly, the "godly folk" left their trademark hateful comments in response.  Rice did not countenance the batshitery and let loose stating in part as follows:

Our post commending actress Ellen Page for her courage in coming out as gay attracted a lot of hostility and hate and hate speech --- as well as positive and substantive comments. I have banned many from the page today. I will no longer tolerate hate speech in the guise of Christian belief with the usual irresponsible pick and choose bible quotes and talk of "sin" and hellfire. I have had enough of it, and I think the world has had enough of it too. 

Again, I commend Ellen Page for her bravery in coming out. I hope more celebrities and public figures will be inspired to do so. Anyone who thinks this does not matter is deceiving himself or herself. It matters very much. Gay people in all walks of life suffer from bigotry, bias, superstition, and ignorance. Hats off to Ellen Page! (And please do NOT come here to tell us publicly that you “don’t care.” If you don’t care, don’t expect us to care that you don’t care!).

I agree with Rice.  I will no longer give hate-filled bigots a pass simply because they try to hide their foul hate and bigotry under the guise of religious belief.  These people are toxic not to mention utter hypocrites.

Australian Actor Harry Cook Comes Out

It seems that more and more celebrities and sports figures are coming out.  Olympic diver Tom Daley, obviously is one who comes to mind.  But there have been many more this year.  Towleroad has a compilation here of some of the more notable people who have taken the plunge and begun living honestly during 2013.  A new addition to this group who came out today is Australian actor Harry Cook who posted a poignant video on YouTube (see the clip above) as his way of making his announcement.  In the clip, Cook talks about the fear he experienced in deciding to be honest.  He also talks about the huge relief he felt once he took the plunge.

I continue to be contacted frequently by those who are either still in the closet as well as those who have recently come out.  Yes, coming out is a terrifying experience, especially if one has married and had children with a straight spouse.  But the stress of playing a role and trying to be what you are not  - often wracked with self-hate in the process - is so debilitating and, at least in my own case, made me someone who was not  always the best person to be around and certainly not the husband and father I wanted to be. I truly would never want to go back in the closet and relive the torment that it involved.  I wish the best of luck and happiness to Cook and the others who have come out this year.

For those unfamiliar with who Harry Cook is, Towleroad has these details:

Australian actor Harry Cook came out of the closet in a video posted to his YouTube account yesterday.

Said Cook: "Life's too short to be anything but yourself. So, on that note...I'm gay."

Cook said he was worried about coming out because he's an actor:

"I thought about it for a really long time and really stewed over it. I was like 'Oh my God, this could ruin my career.' All this crap… and then it kind-of hit me that that’s so ridiculous...The title of my job is 'actor'. It's fake. It's pretend. I'm not me. I know how to play straight - I did it all through high school."

Cook is best known for co-starring with Geena Davis in the 2009 coming of age dramedy Accidents Happen. He has also performed at The Corpus Playroom in Cambridge UK at the International Playwright Competition as the lead in the play "Russets" which went on to win the competition.

Out Singer Frank Ocean Tops R&B Chart

For far too long the conventional wisdom has been that being openly gay kills one's chances for success.  Yes, there has been some truth to the view - I was forced from a large law firm after coming out since "a gay partner might offend the sensibilities of conservative clients."  But on the other hand my client base of Hindu, Muslim and even some far right christian organizations has continued to grow with no apparent damage from my refusal to hide in the closet.  Google my name and seriously, it's hard not to know I'm gay.  Yet time and time again many new clients say they found me on the Internet.  Others are referred by existing clients who I strongly suspect know I'm gay.  They simply don't care as long as I'm good at representing their interests.

Now, in the entertainment realm, a new first has occurred: an out artist has debuted at the top of the Billboard charts.  This follows the success of actors and actresses who are "out" with no apparent damage to their careers.  The knuckle dragging Neanderthals may avoid them, but most of society, like my clients, simply don't care.  I hope other entertainers and those in other industries take note and refuse to remain closeted.  Here are some highlights from Billboard:

Frank Ocean, the singer among rappers in the alternative rap collective Odd Future, plants his debut studio album, "channel ORANGE," at No. 1 on the R&B/Hip-Hop Albums chart with 131,000 sold, according to Nielsen SoundScan. With an initial projected opening sales week of 40,000, overflowing support came in after Ocean's tumblr announcement regarding his sexuality.  Ocean also debuted at #2 on the Top 200 Pop Albums chart.

I continue to believe that the most powerful form of activism most of us can undertake is to live our lives openly with pride and dignity.  By doing so, we change hearts and minds and kill the stereotypes that our enemies seek to inflict on us. 

Frank Ocean Performs 'Bad Religion'

I noted last week that singer/songwriter Frank Ocean had come out and acknowledged that his first love was another man causing a stir in both the hip-hop and R&B music worlds. Last night Ocean made his first ever television appearance on Jimmy Fallon's stage and performed out "Bad Religion," which is a track from his debut album Channel Orange.   A video clip is set out below.   As noted in my post last week, part of Frank Ocean's coming out statement was  “I don’t have any secrets I need kept any more.”  He's apparently making good on that statement since the lyrics of "Bad Religion" read in part as follows:

This unrequited love
To me it's nothing but
A one-man cult
And cyanide in my styrofoam cup
I could never make him love me
Never make him love me
Love
Love
…
It's a bad religion
To be in love with someone
Who could never love you
I know
Only bad religion
Could have me feeling the way I do

Needless to say, I also believe that the title of the song sends a message about religion that focuses on fear and hatred of others.  Here's the video clip:

I continue to wish Ocean the best of everything on his journey. From my own experience, admitting who one really is and not feeling the need to lie and hide anymore is a remarkable, liberating experience.  For me, it was as if a huge, huge weight had been taken off of me.  Yes, moments of fear persisted at times, but over all, it was perhaps the most soul restoring thing I have experienced.  I sincerely hope that Ocean finds the liberation and self-acceptance that I found.  I also hope that his courage will inspire others to stop lying to both themselves and those around them.

Do Gay Celebrities Have an Obligation to Come Out?

In the wake of Anderson Cooper's decision to belatedly "come out" yesterday, the debate has been ratcheted up on whether or not gay celebrities have an obligation to come out.  One view sees celebrity and the access to the media that it provides as putting pressure on closeted individuals to come out and shatter the stereotypes and stigma.  Others view the issue of coming out as a personal choice.  I guess I fall some where in the middle - unless the closeted celebrity or politician is engaged in anti-gay activity, in which case then my view is "out the bastard."  Our former Congressman in this area Ed Schrock who I helped expose was a case in point: second most anti-gay voting record in Congress even as he solicited gay sex trysts.  The New York Times as a dialogue on the issue.  First, the view that gay celebrities need to come out:   

Not all gay people in the media feel as radical as I do about why it’s important for gay celebrities to come out of the closet. But having been a teenager in the 1980s, I remember when there were no — as in zero — out role models for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender kids to emulate. Instead, we survived on rumors of Sapphic superstar love triangles and A-list leading men who joined cults that helped keep their gay secrets. Gossip has its own power, not to mention pleasure, but let’s face it: The world is a better place when people aren’t lying. 

So much has changed since that time, and there is now a platter of options for celebrities who want to come out. There’s the People magazine route (splashy, safe, widely-circulated); there’s the recent Matt Bomer path, when he casually, yet seismically, thanked his longtime male partner during a speech (see also: Jodie Foster); and there’s a new road that I really like, which is the Zachary Quinto/Jim Parsons method, in which an actor simply identifies himself as gay as part of a bigger story in a highbrow news outlet.

Cooper has struck me in recent years as an example of a closeted famous person who didn’t mean for his secret to become such a big deal, and found himself stuck. But I think he’ll find that it’s easy to go from being a part of the toxic problem of homophobic self-hatred to a hero. And who wouldn’t want that? 

But as I said, not everyone shares this view and I know people locally who continue to live a lie in the public life while having either enduring relationships or a string of conquests.  Their very behavior suggests that being gay is still something that is shameful.  Here's a countering view from the Times:

If we suggested that gay celebrities have a moral obligation to come out, then any celebrity would have the same responsibility to acknowledge any hidden situation whose disclosure could theoretically help society. The heartbreak of psoriasis? Do a public service announcement. A victim of sexual abuse? You need to go talk about it on “The View.” Going bankrupt? Get ahead of this story and help other Americans in similar situations.

Obviously this is a ridiculous standard. We’re talking about people’s romantic lives, which are, by definition, notoriously confusing and fickle.

I’ve always said there are four kinds of gays in Hollywood. There's the openly gay; the gay and everybody knows it but nobody talks about it; the married, closeted gay who doesn't talk about it; and the screaming “I’ll sue you if you say I'm gay” person. In other words, the no closet, the glass closet, the cast iron closet and the closet you get buried in.

Of course, it’s 2012. Celebrities and the rest of us have less privacy than ever before. But you still get to choose how openly you want to live your life — or at least you can try until blogs and tabloids out you. 

That being said, surely every celebrity who has ever come out is happier and freer of fear, helps other people, furthers the cause of gay civil rights, and lives a more open and authentic life. So if someone wants to stay in the closet, they’re not being immoral — just silly.

With the suicides of gay teens far too prevalent, the more celebrities who come out and provide a glimmer of hope to LGBT youth the better.   Remaining in the closet sends a potentially dangerous message to or youth and underscores the hate and bigotry preached weekly in far too many church pulpits.  To me making a difference and making life better for those who come after us should be a top aspiration in life.  Staying in the closet doesn't accomplish that goal.

Anderson Cooper: "The Fact Is, I'm Gay"

Today's crazy schedule at the office followed by a Hampton Roads Pride board of directors meeting did not allow me to comment until now on the official coming out of Anderson Cooper which was done via an e-mail to Andrew Sullivan that was published with Cooper's permission. Many have already said their two cents - and not all of it kind - about what many in the LGBT community considered an open secret.  But I believe Cooper deserves credit for finally taking the plunge.  In his e-mail to Andrew he explained why he had been in the closet so long and also why he finally felt he could not do t any more.  To me, here's the million dollar portion of his statement:

[W]hile as a society we are moving toward greater inclusion and equality for all people, the tide of history only advances when people make themselves fully visible. There continue to be far too many incidences of bullying of young people, as well as discrimination and violence against people of all ages, based on their sexual orientation, and I believe there is value in making clear where I stand.

The fact is, I'm gay, always have been, always will be, and I couldn’t be any more happy, comfortable with myself, and proud.

I have always been very open and honest about this part of my life with my friends, my family, and my colleagues. In a perfect world, I don't think it's anyone else's business, but I do think there is value in standing up and being counted.   .    .   .   .  I do think visibility is important, more important than preserving my reporter’s shield of privacy.

The hate consumed Christianists will never be converted by the coming out of celebrities like Cooper.  But the more individuals in the public eye like Anderson Cooper, Rachel Maddow, Ellen Degeneres, Niel Patrick Harris, etc., who live their lives openly, the more the anti-gay stereotypes and lies disseminated by our enemies will be rejected by the majority of society.  

It's also important to realize that each one of us - even if we lack a public platform such as the above cited individuals - can play our own part in being visible and forcing people to open their minds and ultimately their hearts to our community.  Yes, it is terrifying at times, but not hiding in fear and being open about who you are does make a difference.  Anderson Cooper got that message and took it to heart.

Kristy McNichol Comes Out Officially

Yet another well know TV star of the past has come out of the closet officially. The newest person joining Meredith Baxter in being open and honest about herself is Kristy McNichol, the Emmy Award winning teen star of the 1970s that many people remember from the drama Family. Some will say what's the point of a former star coming out years after their principal years of fame have past. It's a valid question and I think the response is that with each coming out by a celebrity past or present it helps demolish the lies and stereotypes that the enemies of LGBT equality so love to disseminate. The less that LGBT people can be referred to as some theoretical "other" or generic "gays," the sooner we'll see the death of discrimination and anti-gay bullying outside of pockets of Christofascists and the professional Christian set. It's far more difficult to hate and support discrimination against people that you know as neighbors, friends or even an actor that you enjoy/enjoyed. Here are some highlights fro People Magazine:

Kristy McNichol has been out of the public eye for 20 years. Now she's chosen to come out – to try to help kids who are being bullied.

McNichol, 49, who has lived with her partner Martie Allen, also 49, for the past two decades, decided to make a statement about her sexuality and share this photo because she is "approaching 50" and wants to "be open about who I am."

She "is very sad about kids being bullied," her publicist Jeff Ballard tells PEOPLE. "She hopes that coming out can help kids who need support. She would like to help others who feel different."

Best known for her Emmy Award-winning role as Buddy Lawrence in the '70s show Family and later as Barbara Weston in Empty Nest, McNichol left it all behind when she dropped out of Hollywood to focus on her health.

Gay CNN Anchor Comes Out Publicly With Book

Yet another highly visible professional has decided to come out publicly. This time it's CNN weekend anchor Don Lemon who is releasing a book entitled Transparent that deals with his career and life. As the New York Times reports, Lemon:

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"has no illusions about what he is getting himself into with the book he has written about his career — and life. In “Transparent,” Mr. Lemon has a lot to say about reporting for television and about journalism in general. But he knows enough about news to recognize what will get this book noticed. “People are going to say: ‘Oh, he was molested as a kid and now he is coming out.’ I get it,” he said."

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Some would say that Lemon's decision to be up front and totally open about who he is should not be seen as a big deal. However, with each visible figure who comes out publicly, the stereotypes used against LGBT citizens by the Christian Taliban are challenged and eroded a bit more each day. It is so important that role models exist for LGBT teens who are struggling with who they are - often in hostile regions of the country where all they see and hear is anti-gay negativity. Lemon has dedicated his book to the memory of Tyler Clementi. Here are more highlights from the Times article:
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Few national television news anchors or hosts have publicly acknowledged being gay. Rachel Maddow is perhaps the best known. Her MSNBC colleague, Thomas Roberts, has also come out as gay.
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Mr. Lemon has not made a secret of his sexual orientation in his work life; many of his CNN co-workers and managers have long been aware that he is gay. But he still acknowledged that going public in his book carries certain risks.
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Even beyond whatever effect his revelation might have on his television career, Mr. Lemon said he recognized this step carried special risk for him as a black man.
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“It’s quite different for an African-American male,” he said. “It’s about the worst thing you can be in black culture. You’re taught you have to be a man; you have to be masculine. In the black community they think you can pray the gay away.” He said he believed the negative reaction to male homosexuality had to do with the history of discrimination that still affects many black Americans, as well as the attitudes of some black women.
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So why do it? It really came down to the act of writing the book. Mr. Lemon said he had been on a panel a couple of years ago called “The Black Man in the Age of Obama,” and was approached afterward by a publisher’s representative about writing an inspirational book.
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“I abhor hypocrisy. I think if you’re going to be in the business of news, and telling people the truth, of trying to shed light in dark places, then you’ve got to be honest. You’ve got to have the same rules for yourself as you do for everyone else.” He has been assured of support by CNN
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“I think it would be great if everybody could be out,” he said. “But it’s such a personal choice. People have to do it at their own speed. I respect that. I do have to say that the more people who come out, the better it is for everyone, certainly for the Tyler Clementis of the world.” . . . “I think if I had seen more people like me who are out and proud, it wouldn’t have taken me 45 years to say it,” Mr. Lemon said, “to walk in the truth.”

Ricky Martin Says He Loves Being Out and Gay

The far right nutcase Cardinal Luis Aponte Martinez of San Juan has blasted Ricky Martin for "promoting his homosexuality," but Martin seems un-intimidated and continues to talk about the benefits of being officially out of the closet and having moved on to self-acceptance and a rejection of the religious based self-loathing that too often goes with life in the closet. As long time readers of this blog know full well, my coming out journey was a nightmare in many ways. From the e-mails and discussions I get from readers, I am hardly alone in this experience. I applaud Ricky Martin speaking out about the liberating aspects of coming out and saying "No" to the religious bullshit that is used to stigmatize gays as he recently did on the Tonight Show speaking with Jay Leno. No one benefits long term living in the closet be it to satisfy parents or a simple case of yielding to church or perceived societal pressures. Selling one's soul is never a positive thing. Metro Weekly looks at Martin's conversation with Jay Leno. Here are some highlights:
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It was a lot of struggle. And if you add to that, let's call it culture, religion, society, what people say -- you know, what I was feeling what I have in my mind was evil.
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''And I'm very lucky today to say that I'm gay, and I love it. And I'm very happy, and that's it! ... A lot of people say, 'Yeah, what's new? We knew that.' But it was about what I was feeling and my own fears, and my struggles. And I know that there's a lot of people out there, men and women, that are struggling with that.... Everybody has to go through their own spiritual journey.... I just tell people to take care of themselves and focus on dignity and self esteem and look at yourself in the mirror and say, 'I love you.'"
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Latin and pop music singer Ricky Martin talking with Jay Leno on The Tonight Show, Tuesday, May 3. He said that the media response has been amazing since his coming out, and that his concerts are currently selling out.
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Watch the video:
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Scottish Cycling Champion Graeme Obree Comes Out

Another major UK sports figure has come out adding the the demolition of the stereotype fanned by the professional Christian set and others that gays are not athletic and/or are feminine in their demeanor. This time, the sports star coming out is former world champion cyclist Graeme Obree (pictured at left). I identify with Obree because he stayed in the closet for many years because he had been brainwashed as I had been to think that "Being homosexual was so unthinkable that you just wouldn't be gay." Like myself, he was in therapy for years and attempted suicide before finding a reconciliation with who he is. I hope that he can now continue to find a peace and self-acceptance as I have been ultimately been able to do. I also hope that as more figures like Obree come out, it will ease the path for following generations. It continues to enrage me that individuals are taught to hold self-hate just so that the psychologically disturbed Christianists and the whore like professional Christian set can feel good about themselves. Here are some highlights from the Advocate on this story:
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Former world champion cyclist Graeme Obree says that after attempts to commit suicide and years of therapy, he is finally comfortable being an out gay man. Obree was raised during a time when it seemed better to be "dead than gay," so he suppressed his feelings, he told The Scottish Sun.
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"I was brought up by a war generation," he said. "They grew up when gay people were put in jail. Being homosexual was so unthinkable that you just wouldn't be gay. I'd no inkling about anything, I just closed down."
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In 2005, Obree began to go to a psychologist who helped him realize he had been suppressing his emotions for years. He eventually came out to his family, including his wife.
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I wish Obree well and hope that he finds the peace that so long eluded him.

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka Are Expecting Twins

This is news came out a few days ago but merits recognition in my book nonetheless. The news? That Neil Patrick Harris and his partner, David Burtka, are expecting twins via a surrogate mother. Without a doubt elements of the fanatical Christian Right will be condemning Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka of "depriving their children the right to a mother," but I applaud their decision. I have know far too many lousy heterosexual parents and find it difficult to believe that dedicated gay parents won't far exceed the norm set by opposite parents who fail to do anything for their children past the act of procreation. Here are some highlights from The Advocate's coverage:
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Neil Patrick Harris announced Saturday that he and his partner, David Burtka, are expecting twins this fall.
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Harris, the openly gay star of the sitcom How I Met Your Mother and director of the recent Hollywood Bowl run of the musical Rent, made the announcement via his Twitter account.
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We’re super excited/nervous/thrilled. Hoping the press can respect our privacy…”
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My congratulations to both of them. I hope that they enjoy the wonders of being a parent and find the joy that my children have given to me. I also hope that the media will leave them alone.

Clay Aiken (Finally) and Lindsay Lohan Come Out

Two celebrities have advised the media that they are gay: Clay Aiken and Lindsay Lohan. Hopefully as more successful celebrities and professionals come out the number of gays who feel compelled to live in the closet will diminish. I wish both Aiken and Lohan well and hope they find the liberation and self-acceptance I have found through being totally and apologetically "out."

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First, the news on Aiken - my gaydar went off years ago when I saw Aiken filmed up close in a TV interview - Clay Aiken is admitting that he is gay in a story to be featured in People magazine. No doubt some of his fans will be bent out of shape, but that's their problem, not Aiken's. What is sad is that Aiken like so many other felt that he had to remain officially closeted in order to be accepted and/or marketable. Here are some highlights from Reuters:

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LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - After years of dodging questions, former "American Idol" singer Clay Aiken will acknowledge he is a gay man in an interview with People magazine set to run on its Web site Wednesday, according to media reports.

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Celebrity site Perez Hilton.com on Tuesday published a photo of the cover of People magazine's upcoming issue on which Aiken cradles his new son, Parker Foster Aiken, in his arms. The caption reads "Yes, I'm Gay," and underneath is a quote from Aiken on his decision to come out of the closet that says: "I cannot raise a child to lie or to hide things."

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For years, Aiken has dodged questions about whether he is homosexual despite persistent rumors on the subject. He has said, generally, that his sexuality was nobody's business but his own. In 2006, ABC television's Diane Sawyer asked Aiken and he shot back that it was a "really rude" question. He also dodged it in a previous interview with People magazine saying that readers "are going to believe what they want."

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In the case of Lohan, the news is not necessarily a surprise based on recent rumors, but having it official will perhaps cause more people to rethink their prejudices. Here is what the Chicago Sun Times is reporting:

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In other closet-opening news, many online outlets are reporting that Lindsay Lohan has "confirmed" a lesbian relationship with DJ Samantha Ronson. Lohan and Ronson rarely have been seen apart for several months, and they too have dodged direct questions about the nature of their relationship.

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But Lohan called into the Los Angeles-based radio show "Loveline" last night to comment on the recent fatal plane crash that injured former Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker and DJ AM. Host Ted Stryker asked Lohan how long she and Lohan had been "going out." "Like two years? One year? Five months, two months?" he asked. Lohan chuckled, then said, "A long, a very long time." Stryker ended the conversation by saying, "Well, I hope you stay together. You are a very lovely looking couple." Lohan thanked him.

Jodie Foster Cracks Open the Door: Thanks Cydney in Accepting Sherry Lansing Leadership Award

I can fully understand the desire to keep ones personal life private. However, if this action is a step towards Jody Foster opening the closet door publicly (http://www.afterellen.com/people/2007/12/jodiefoster), I applaud her for doing so. She is an amazingly talented actress and has a huge fan base who should accept her on the merits of her work alone. I believe that as more prominent, popular celebrities come out, it can only help further the cause of gay rights and diminish the negative image of us as messed up alcoholics and drug users our Christian Right enemies try to sell to the public. It will be interesting to see if Jody makes any further moves to publicly acknowledge her apparent partner. Here are some story highlights:

In a surprising and moving speech on Tuesday, Jodie Foster, 45, thanked "my beautiful Cydney who sticks with me through all the rotten and the bliss" when she accepted the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award at the 16th annual Women in Entertainment Power 100 breakfast.

The award is named after the former chief of Paramount Pictures, Sherry Lansing, who told the Associated Press that she was "overwhelmed to be presenting it to Jodie." The L.A. Daily News reporter covering the event, Greg Hernandez, noted surprise "at the public acknowledgment of who I presume is Cydney Bernard, the woman who is widely reported to be her life partner," because Foster has always been "so intensely private."

Foster has steadfastly refused to discuss or publicly acknowledge her relationship with Cydney Bernard, whom she reportedly met on the set of Sommersby in 1993. Although Bernard has accompanied her to premieres and public events outside the United States, Foster has never brought her to public events in America. But in the last year or so, Foster has seemed to be taking small steps toward making her private life a little bit more public.