Appalachian Trail Update - 7/26/08

My son continues to make steady progress on his adventure hiking the Appalachian Trail. The photos below were taken in the Presidential Mountain Range of the White Mountains in northeast New Hampshire. A view of the mountains from virtual earth can be found here. The lower photo is at the summit of Mount Washington at an elevation of 6,288 feet. My son's comment is that the winds at the summit were over 40 miles per hour - i.e., near tropical storm strength. The second photo is at the summit of Mount Madison which has an elevation of 5,366 feet and which is located somewhere between 5 and 10 miles north of Mount Washington. By my rough calculations, he has covered approximately 1,795 miles since he began the venture in Georgia. I continue to be so very proud of him.

Late Night Thoughts - Angels on Earth

It is strange how when we least expect it someone will come into our lives and touch us in unimagined ways. At first, their appearance may seem some totally random event. But in retrospect, it seems that there was some purpose - some divine purpose perhaps - behind their entrance into your life.

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From their comments from time to time, I realize that some readers are skeptics at best when it comes to belief in God or angels or religion in general. There are days that I am so inclined myself, yet my faith - perhaps in a Jeffersonian deist form - always rebounds. In part, this may due to the powers of goodness and spirituality that one unexpectedly encounters in life. Sometimes these powers evidence themselves in human form. People who touch our hearts and heal our souls at times of darkness and fear. Some of you readers have done that to/for me. There are days that your comments, e-mails and phone calls have kept me going. Perhaps even saved my life during the darkest days of my divorce nightmare when I feel I was largely on trial for being gay. Then again through my fears of potentially dire medical issues that ultimately proved to be false alarms.

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One reader, however, holds a special place in my heart above all others. This individual is very private, so I will not reveal her/his identity. Suffice it to say, that this person has been an angel on earth for me. This person has helped me through some incredibly dark moments plagued with fear and/or the inclination to slide back towards self destructive and possibly even suicidal thoughts. This person has believed in me when I have almost lost belief in myself. There is no way in which I can ever fully thank or repay this individual for what they have given me.

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Suffice it to say, I love this person though we've never met. Indeed, I will always hold love for them in my heart, I truly hope we have an opportunity to met someday. But if not, this person will always be in my heart and mind. Always. I hope they realize this. To make sure, I am saying it here to you.

Final Saturday Male Beauty

More Catholic Church Gay Sexcapades

I can only wonder at times if the parade of sex abuse cases involving the Roman Catholic Church will ever end. Personally, I suspect not for the simple reason that the Church's own bizarre obsession with sexual matters and the screwed up way in which Catholic priests are taught about the supposed evil (or is it the attractions of) sex, pretty much guarantee that priests will never be individuals who have had a normal sexual development, especially those roped into the high school seminary programs. Compounding the problem are the disingenuous, self-serving, and self-adoring members of the Church hierarchy (like Cardinal Pell pictured at left) who believe they are answerable to no one. The first story comes from Australia via ABC News in the wake of the Nazi Pope's visit and involves the criminal conviction of a priest who sexually molested seven students in a boy's school; Here are a few highlights:

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Seven former students of a boy's school in Engadine in Sydney's south accused Father Paul Evans of rape and sexual assault. He pleaded not guilty, telling the court he hugged and comforted the boys but did not touch them in a sexual way. Today, a jury found him guilty of 18 offences.

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Outside the court, one of his victims said when he told the police about the abuse as a teenager he had been laughed at. He said he was relieved to be recognised by the legal system after so many years.

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No matter how much the Church or Pope tries to down play the problem, the truth is that it is a world wide problem that the hierarchy knew about and did its utmost to cover up. Next, there's the reporting by the Sydney Morning Herald about a sexual abuse victim's struggle to gain a meeting with members of the hierarchy:

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A former Catholic school student says he was sexually abused by a priest and was "gut wrenched" to discover a number of classmates had also been abused. The man told ABC 702 radio this morning that he had made at least 50 attempts to speak with Cardinal Pell and World Youth Day spokesman Bishop Anthony Fisher, since four other people in his class also claimed to be abused by the same priest.

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Paul alleges he was fondled and molested by the priest as a young student at a Brisbane Catholic school in the late 1950s and early 1960s. He said he attempted to tell people about his alleged abuse at the time, but was rebuffed on each occasion.

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And last ironically, there's this story also from the Sydney Morning Herald which shows how little the Church actually cares about protecting children and youth from sexual predator priests. Seems the Church doesn't have the money to support a treatment center for sexually abusive priests. Seems a bit odd in light of the palatial splendor in which the Pope and "princes of the church" like Cardinal Pell live their posh and protected lives. I wonder, how much did it cost the Church to have Benedict XVI make his trip to Australia? More than the $200,000 to keep the treatment center open? Do you want to vomit yet? Here are some highlights:

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THE Catholic Church's national sexual abuse assessment and treatment facility this month consists of one volunteer in Kincumber on a mobile phone. Encompass, which treated more than 1100 Catholic clergy for psychosexual and other mental health issues, closed on June 30 after the church hierarchy decided against spending $200,000 a year to keep it going. In the meantime, a former board member, Timothy O'Hearn has been left to answer Encompass's phone, referring church employees with mental health issues to private treatment.

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Opened in 1997 by the Australian Catholic Bishops Conference and the Australian Conference of Leaders of Religious Institutes, Encompass treated more than 1100 people, 250 of them in an intensive six-month residential psychosexual program, according to its final newsletter.

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But staff were rebuffed when they asked for $200,000 a year to keep the service going, several sources have told the Herald. One former staff member, who requested anonymity, said it was "a tragedy" for offenders and victims of sexual abuse. "If we can spend that much money to have the Pope come out, what is $200,000 a year?" the former staffer said. "The priests would be rejoicing that Encompass has closed, as they are in total denial."

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As I have said before, anyone who believes the hierarchy is sorry for the sex abuse scandal is mistaken and/or a fool. The ONLY sorrow is that the Church got caught and exposed as a disingenuous old whore of an institution. The corruption within the hierarchy knows no national or geographic boundaries.

Bush Iraq Crusade Continues to Help Taliban

The New York Times has yet another disturbing story on the growing power of the Taliban - you know, the group ACTUALLY in league with Al-Qeada - in Afghanistan and, more frighteningly, in Pakistan, a nation that DOES, in fact, have atomic weapons other than in the delusional mind of the Chimperator. While the USA removed Saddam, it has in many ways destroyed the nation of Iraq and meanwhile left the true enemies to rebuild and perhaps even flourish in some areas. Definitely a case of taking one's eye of the ball. That's assuming the idiot Chimperator ever knew what the ball was. A noted in passing yesterday the cretin's approval rating had dropped to 27%, a new low. Heck of a Job, Chimpy! Here are some highlights from the Times story:

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Now the area, around the town of Parachinar, is near the center of the new kind of struggle. The Taliban have inflamed and exploited a long-running sectarian conflict that has left the town under siege. The Taliban, which have solidified control across Pakistan’s tribal zone and are seeking new staging grounds to attack American soldiers in Afghanistan, have sided with fellow Sunni Muslims against an enclave of Shiites settled in Parachinar for centuries. The population of about 55,000 is short of food. The fruit crop is rotting, residents say, and the cost of a 66-pound bag of flour has skyrocketed to $100.

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And, in a mini-conflict that yet again demonstrates the growing influence of the Taliban and the Pakistan government’s lack of control over this highly sensitive border area, young and old, wounded and able-bodied, have become refugees in their own land. Last month, a Pakistani government relief convoy loaded with food and medicines that had been sent to break the siege was attacked by the Taliban at the village of Pir Qayyum. Many of the 22 vehicles were burned and 12 drivers were killed by the Taliban, according to government officials here and Shiites.

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Groups of Taliban affiliated with Mr. Mehsud, who according to the Bush administration is supported by Al Qaeda, now control wide swaths of the tribal areas, from Waziristan in the south to Bajur in the north. From some parts of the tribal areas, like Waziristan and Mohmand, the Taliban have stepped up their operations into Afghanistan against NATO and American soldiers, cross-border attacks that have resulted in rising casualties for coalition forces over the last two months, the Bush administration said.

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To try to quash the Taliban, the ministry would urge the local tribes to form small armies, known as lashkar, he said. The ministry was also offering local people financial rewards, he said, if they killed a Taliban leader. But whether the army would take a role in the efforts to find a solution appeared to remain an open question.

More Saturday Male Beauty

Random Thoughts - Updated Saturday Evening

UPDATED: I have modified this post. I am trying to find out more information, but it seems that there was a reason for my friend's seemingly - from my perspective - out of control behavior. In deference to him and all the wonder moments we have shared, I have deleted the rant portion of the post I wrote this morning. Please keep my friend in your thoughts and prayers.

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This coming week should be interesting since my new subtenant for a portion of my office space will be moving in, with full occupancy to take place on Friday. I'd prefer not having an additional sub-tenant, but with the current economic slow down and utter crash of the residential real estate market, cutting overhead is a must. And who is my new subtenant you ask? The eastern office of the Virginia Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America ("ELCA"). They were seeking new office space in the general area of my office and a realtor friend who attends my parish brought them by since he knew I was looking for ways to lower overhead costs. Everyone seems very nice and hopefully all will go smoothly with us sharing the lobby area and the main conference room and kitchen. Whether or not they realize they are moving into the midst of a gay enclave remains to be seen. :) I believe that the strongest witness gays can make is to just be themselves and dispel the distorted stereotypes that some may hold - both I and my gay staff member will try to do our part in this cause.

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On the romance front, I had a date on Wednesday evening with a very nice guy who is smart, personable, age appropriate as some might call it, seems totally comfortable with himself, and who is totally out. Hopefully, we will see each other again sometime soon. I truly do not want to get involved with someone in the closet because of all the baggage that goes with it. After years of hiding and worrying about be found out, it is SO liberating to just be able to be who I am with no pretense or apologies. I truly do not believe I could go back to living that way or with someone who lived in constant fear of discovery. To me the term "discrete" one sees in personal ads equates to repressed and a lack of self-acceptance.

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Speaking of romance, next month my friends Martin and Christopher are having their long delayed wedding celebration. They were married last summer on 7-7-07 in Canada but never had a chance for a real celebration party due Christopher's mother's health (she died last summer). His mom was a truly great lady and a true inspiration for me and so many, many people. The affair will be on Virginia's Eastern Shore at a fabulous B&B. The house was originally built in 1746 and was destroyed in a fire around 1960. It has been faithfully restored and as the photo above and additional photos on the web site reveal, it is gorgeous. I still need to find a date for the affair. Any interested takers out there? :)

Saturday Male Beauty

"Munchausen-by-Blog Syndrome"

Blogging can open up access to all kinds of wonderful people. It also can be a good form of therapy - perhaps one of the reasons I continue to blog - and blogging allows one to voice their thoughts and feelings with feed back from readers and others. I am pretty open with my identity and if one wanted to do so, they could literally find me in person and confirm that I am who and what I say I am. The business card shown on this blog IS my real business card, for example. Not so with all bloggers it seems. Which is why I on occasion go off on anonymous commentors who post foul comments yet lack the integrity to reveal their identity.

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All too easily one can create a false persona and imagined existence and gain a following and support from readers that apparently satisfies some weird, messed up psychological issues/needs of the person actually behind the phantom personality that emerges from the blog. Recent events have shown that I like apparently many, many others fell victim to one such false blog and the obviously screwed up author behind it. Like many, I cross linked to Cooper's Corridor and then was an invitee to Nico's Niche. Now I find out that the blogger was a fraud and that much of the material was stolen from another blogger. I guess the moral is to be suspicious and cynical - something I do not like to be - unless and until you confirm the real existence of blog authors. Here are some highlights from Joe My God that disclose the unfolding of the unmasking of "Cooper" who in truth never existed (I thank Joe for the title of this post, btw):

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Remember Cooper? The firefighter gay dad of two adopted boys who pulled his widely-loved blog after an "attack" of malicious comments and emails from the readers of this blog? Causing me to get extremely bent of out shape and offer Cooper a heartfelt (really) public apology? Over the last few days our little blogosphere has retched forth some unpleasant, uncomfortable revelations about Cooper. The short version:

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He is not a firefighter.

He is not an adoptive father.

He is not gay.

He is not, in fact, a he.

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The story began to unfold at Sweet/Salty, the blog of a woman named Kate, a young mother dealing with the death of her infant son. On the day of the supposed attack on Cooper's blog by JMG readers, Kate had emailed him, extremely distressed to have discovered that Cooper had lifted many of her gorgeously written posts verbatim, including photographs of her husband.

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Upon receipt of Kate's surprisingly kind request to remove her plagiarized material, Cooper deleted his blog and apparently then concocted the JMG attack story to placate his legion of starry-eyed readers, people who avidly followed Cooper's Corridor as a place where they saw their most earnest ideals about gay parenting realized.Shortly afterwards, Cooper's Corridor resumed as Nico's Niche, a private blog where Kate's material continued to appear. Kate found my public apology to Cooper and emailed me about the situation. Knowing that Father Tony has had a longtime internet friendship with Cooper, I put him on the case. What he uncovered may blow your mind.

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According to the bizarre confession wrangled by Father Tony, Cooper's Corridor/Nico's Niche was written by a woman, a 52-year-old British Columbia grandmother named Jo, who says that ever since she was a little girl she has felt that she is a gay man trapped in a woman's body. Cooper/Nico (Jo claims) was a concoction created in order to deal with her lifelong gender identity disorder. She says she calls her inner gay man "Nicky".

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Go read Kate's initial angry post, then you absolutely must delve into Father Tony's post, where in addition to publishing Jo's emailed "confession", he muses in his typically artful way about the anonymous nature of the internet and how much we can ever really know about people, even when we think we have an insider's view of their day-to-day lives.

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Even this post may please the sort of person who engages in what I call "Munchausen-by-blog syndrome", but consider this yet another unhappy lesson about trust, gullibility, and how we as gay people are sometimes overeager to find our heroes.

Honored Pentecostal Navy Chaplain Charged with Sex Offenses

It was surprised to check out today's Virginian Pilot and find yet another story of a supposedly "man of God" who apparently crossed the line and is now facing sex abuse charges. This time the accused is a Pentacostal Navy Chaplain who who won awards for ministering to wounded troops and who escorted President Bush around the Navy's flagship hospital. Why is it that these individuals always seem to be affiliated with the most conservative, sexually repressed religious denominations? I cannot help but wonder whether the very anti-sex obsession of some of these denominations isn't somehow a root cause of the screwed up sexuality of such individuals. The Roman Catholic priesthood is a case in point. Do the denominations attract those with sexual hang ups to ministry, or does their religious dogma create the hang ups? I believe a good portion of the causation lies with the latter. Here are some story highlights:

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A chaplain who won awards for ministering to wounded troops and who escorted President Bush around the Navy's flagship hospital could be court-martialed on a range of charges, including multiple counts of adultery and fraternization. Navy lawyers laid out their case against Lt. Shane R. Dillman in an Article 32 hearing, similar to a preliminary hearing in civilian court, Thursday and Friday at Norfolk Naval Station. Prosecutors painted Dillman as an officer who repeatedly manipulated young enlisted women, abused his position of trust, and solicited vulnerable sailors for dates and sex.

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Four junior enlisted women testified about their relationships with Dillman, a Pentecostal minister who is married with children and lives in Williamsburg. Three of the women served with Dillman on the aircraft carrier Carl Vinson, which is being refueled at Northrop Grumman Newport News. The fourth, a petty officer third class, testified by phone from Iraq, where she is serving as a hospital corpsman.

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The sailor, now 23, said she met Dillman through a group Bible study at Camp Arifjan, Kuwait, in late 2005. She said she and the chaplain - who was 35 when he was formally charged in January - became close friends, then developed a romantic relationship. Under questioning, she said she and Dillman would meet in an empty office, lock the door and have sex.

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Even if Dillman is cleared of all charges, his job could be in jeopardy. He was endorsed by the Coalition of Spirit-filled Churches in Newport News, which credentials Pentecostal, Renewal and Charismatic ministers for service as military and civilian chaplains. As of Friday afternoon, Dillman had not notified the coalition of the charges against him, said David Plummer, the group's executive director and endorsing executive. That violates a statement Dillman signed promising to notify the coalition within 72 hours if he is "ever charged with, accused of, investigated for, moved because of, or transferred to another position because of any sexual, criminal or ethical misconduct."

More Friday Male Beauty

California Proposition 8 Backers Take Fight to Kindergarten

As is typical of the unduly hysterical tactics of the Christianists, the supporters of the passage of Proposition 8 which would amend the California Constitution to strip same sex couples of marriage rights, are now disingenuously claiming that passage of the proposition is needed to protect kindergarten age students from "the gay agenda." Never mind that the ballot question has NOTHING to do with elementary education curriculums. But, naturally, that means nothing to the alleged "Godly Christians" who resort to every lie and underhanded tactic imaginable so long as they manage to denigrate gays and strip us of legal rights. These folks truly make me want to vomit. If there is a God, I suspect he/she has a special place in Hell for these hate-filled individuals. Here are highlights from the San Francisco Chronicle on the Christianist latest nastiness:

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SAN FRANCISCO -- Backers of a November initiative to ban same-sex marriage in California plan to tell voters in the state ballot pamphlet that the constitutional amendment would protect children as young as kindergarten age from being taught in school about the virtues of gay and lesbian matrimony.

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If the gay marriage ruling is not overturned, teachers will be required to teach young children there is no difference between gay marriage and traditional marriage," supporters of Proposition 8 said in ballot arguments that went on public display this week at the secretary of state's office.

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Neither the ruling nor the ballot measure mentions education. But Yes on 8 campaign spokeswoman Jennifer Kerns said Thursday that the court decision would make instruction on same-sex marriage mandatory under a state law that requires public schools to offer comprehensive health education programs from kindergarten through high school. Quoting the law, she said those programs must provide instruction on "the legal and financial aspects and responsibilities of marriage." That means students at every grade level must now be taught that same-sex marriage is the same as opposite-sex marriage, Kerns said.

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The state Department of Education recommends that marriage be discussed in high school, but each school district designs its own program, with parental input, said Minter, legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights. "This is a pure fabrication," he said of the Yes on 8 ballot argument. "They are trying to inflame people by making up these falsehoods about kids."

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The No on 8 argument also seeks to defuse religious and political controversies over gay rights and presents the issue as one of fairness and freedom from government intrusion. "The government has no business telling people who can and cannot get married," opponents of the measure declare. "Regardless of how anyone feels about marriage for gay and lesbian couples, people should not be singled out for unfair treatment under the laws of our state."

"Last lecture" Professor Dies at Home in Chesapeake - UPDATE

UPDATE: After writing this post I belatedly learned that amazingly enough, Randy Pausch had spoken with my own angel on earth and greatly inspired that special person. That wonderful person in turn has inspired me. Thank you Randy for the gift that you gave so many, including my angel.

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One never knows how they will react when faced with their own mortality and the prospect of death by a cruel fatal illness. I like to think that I would exhibit some class and character and go out with some flare as opposed to dying in a mean spirited, nasty frame of mind. How to die with dignity and class is something that local Chesapeake resident, Randy Pausch, demonstrated to an incredible degree. Here are some highlights from the Virginian Pilot's story on Pausch's passing:

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Randy Pausch, the Carnegie Mellon University Professor whose upbeat talk about how to live life with gusto while dying was viewed by millions and led to a best-selling book, died early Friday at his Chesapeake home. He was 47. Pausch was an accomplished professor of computer science, human-computer and design who founded a center for entertainment technology at Carnegie Mellon and pioneered the Alice project, a type of software designed to allow anyone to create 3-D animations.

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But it was his lecture on living with joy and zeal, delivered at the university about a month after he found out he was dying of cancer, that gained him fame. . . . Pausch gave his talk in September after finding out he had three to six months of healthy living left. His pancreatic cancer, which he’d been fighting since he was diagnosed in the fall of 2006, had spread to his liver and spleen, essentially a death sentence. The lecture was titled “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.”

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After the lecture, Pausch appeard on the Oprah Winfrey Show and was interviewed by Diane Sawyer on Good Morning America. In May, he was listed by Time Magazine as one of the World’s Top-100 Most Influential People. More than 6 million people have viewed versions of the lecture online, according to his Web site. The lecture was eventually developed into a book, co-authored by Wall Street Journal columnist Jeffrey Zaslow.

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Pausch moved his family to Chesapeake not long after finding out his cancer was terminal, in order to be closer to his wife Jai’s family in Norfolk. In a post on June 26, he wrote about how he was considering going off of chemotherapy, because it was making him weaker and its effects on his tumor weren’t worth the trade-off.

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Pausch is survived by his wife, Jai Glasgow Pausch, and his three children, Dylan, Logan, and Chloe.

Friday Male Beauty

Lawrence King Killer to Be Tried As Adult

I posted recently about Newsweek’s coverage of the Lawrence King murder. While I am happy that the story got coverage, I – like many others, including Sara Whitman at the Huffington Post - am not happy with the tone. Far too much sympathy was given the killer, Brandon McInerney. And excuse me, but NOTHING excuses killing someone just because they may make you uncomfortable. Using that excuse means, for example, that many blacks in the South are open game for murder. It is ridiculous. As Sara Whitman notes:

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The article is one of the poorest forms of journalism I've ever read. If it is an Opinion piece, okay, but to write "Even as homosexuality has become more accepted, the prospect of being openly gay in middle school raises a troubling set of issues" and to state it as fact? To whom? The author? Is he an expert?
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I can go on and on about this piece -- and I will -- but for today I am so deeply troubled by yet another piece of crappy, sensationalist reporting that is only geared towards selling magazines. It is obviously too boring and too common to focus on a 15 year old boy who snuck a gun into school and blew off another kid's head. A kid with drug abusing parents, with divorce and lack of parental supervision. A kid with an obsession with Hilter.
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Because it's really about this bad boy, who wore girls clothes, got what he deserved. Homosexuality was the evil here. Playing "grown up" without knowing it could get you killed. The article takes a kid who is dead and reports how he asked for it? That, in my opinion, is a hate crime.
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How much more of this “blame the victim” game will go on now that, as reported by the Ventura County Star, Brandon McInerney will be tired as an adult. Sadly, I suspect that the defense will do all that it can to try to shift matters around and put Lawrence King on trial rather than McInerney nothwithstanding that it is very obvious that McInerney's actions were premeditated and planned out. Naturally, such a defense will play directly to the extreme homophobes who feel that kill gays is perfectly okay. I likewise expect the Christianists to do all they can to depict McInerney as the victim rather than the dead gay youth. Here are some highlights from the Star story:
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Relying on past court decisions, a judge ruled Thursday that trying a 14-year-old boy accused of murder in an adult court does not violate the constitution, swatting down legal arguments raised by the boy's attorney that it was cruel and unusual punishment to do so. "I cannot say that this is unconstitutional," said Ventura County Superior Court Judge Douglas Daily.
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Teenage defendant Brandon McInerney of Oxnard is charged with first-degree murder and a hate crime in connection with the Feb. 12 killing of classmate Larry King, 15, who sometimes wore makeup and told friends he was gay.

[Senior Deputy District Attorney Maeve] Fox told the judge that state law mandates that if there are special circumstances in a murder case involving juvenile defendants, the district attorney is required to file in adult court. So, even if the judge sided with Quest's legal arguments, Fox said she could, hypothetically, go back and file a "lying in wait" special circumstance against McInerney and by law, the case would have to be transferred back to adult court.

More Disingenuousness from Exodus International

Exodus International and its affliates like to pretend for the mainstream media that they "love homosexuals" but hate the sin, yet when looks at the manner in which they work hand in glove with far right Christianist organizations that work incessantly to disseminate false and hurtful lies about gays and homosexuality, the lie of their lip service soon becomes most apparent. In addition, despite ludicrous claims of thouands of "former homosexuals," Exodus is always hard put to document the existence of any true "ex-gays" other than the ones on the paid staffs of Exodus and its affiliates. One would think that if such individuals existed, there would be at least some who would come forward without being a salaried employee of an ex-gay ministry or an affiliate thereof. From the dozen plus guys I know who survived ex-gay programs, none were cured and a number still carry the emotional and psychological scars from what was done to them in the "ministries. Combine that with the frauds like John Paulk and Michael Johnston, and it becomes crystal clear that Exodus and its affiliates are little more than calculating frauds serving the political agenda of the Christian Right in terms of perpetuating the choice myth and raking in money in the process. Wayne Besen has a new column that does a good job exposing the hypocrisy of Exodus. Here are some highlights:

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Sporting a fog machine for its smoke and mirrors routine and an extravagant stage that would make The Rolling Stones blush, the “ex-gay” group Exodus International held its glitzy annual conference in Asheville, North Carolina. I was in town all week to partner with regional and state organizations to oppose the meeting and its dizzying array of distortions.

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In nearby Greenville, South Carolina, Stephen Moller, an anti-gay thug who murdered 20-year-old Sean William Kennedy outside a gay bar, just learned that he would spend approximately 10 months in jail for his ferocious crime. In this gross miscarriage of justice, the message was sent that murdering gay people was tacitly acceptable, if not encouraged. While in town, I spoke to Sean’s grieving mother, Elke Kennedy, who rightfully called the sentence, “a joke and a slap on the wrist.” Meanwhile, on the opening day of the Exodus conference, an anti-bullying bill was stalled in the North Carolina legislature.

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Into this backdrop of brutality stepped the ex-gay activists Alan Chambers and Randy Thomas, who were determined to show the progressive residents of Asheville that Exodus did not stigmatize gay and lesbian people. Unfortunately, they kept tripping over reality and revealing the true nature of their duplicitous, deceptive and depraved ministry.

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For a week, western North Carolinians were dazzled with disingenuousness. The audacity of the lies was breathtaking and the sheer nerve was mind numbing. By the end of the conference, everyone who had paid attention learned that Exodus leaders are shameless charlatans who lack even a modicum of morality.

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For example, Thomas tried to distance Exodus from the controversial practice of “reparative therapy,” telling the Asheville Citizen-Times, “We get lumped into the groups that do reparative therapy, when it’s just not true.” To put it kindly, Thomas sees the truth as a political pinwheel that he can spin in his efforts to win. I personally visited the Exodus conference (before I was evicted) and found that they were selling several books that taught “reparative therapy” including one from Dr. Joseph Nicolosi who invented the term.

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With such bombastic broadsides, does one really have to wonder how . . . . the gay bashing hooligan, Stephen Moller, believed he could devalue the life of a gay man? Exodus may smile sweetly and tell the mainstream media they love homosexuals. But, judging by the recent hate crimes in the Carolinas combined with the reactionary rhetoric of Exodus, it seems that they are literally “loving” us to death.

Is it John McCain or McWhine?

With every passing day John McCain - or maybe McWhine is more appropriate - seems more and more the crotchety old man who whines on and on about alleged misdeeds of Barack Obama in the presidential campaign. While it's fine for McCain to go to Canada and give a basically political speech aimed at Obama, McWhine is so testy over Obama's tour de force oversees trip one would think his hemroids are killing him or some other such ailment. If it's not taking shots at Obama, then it's whining that the media isn't treating him fairly even though his blunders have at least twice been covered up for him by the media. Rather than whine, he might want to take some time to study some geography to learn that Iraq does NOT share a border with Pakistan. Since McWhine is also upset with the New York Times for not allowing him to run an op-ed piece, I found this "original draft" of the supposed op-ed amusing. Click on the letter for a larger version.

"draft op-ed" from www.236.com

Final Thursday Male Beauty

Kaboom War Journal - Army Censors Blogging Soldier

The Washington Post has an interesting story about a young army officer whose blog has been shut down by the Military. The body of the blog was saved on an archive and can be found here: http://kaboomwarjournalarchive.blogspot.com/. I'm not so sure what was so offensive, but it is illuminating of a mindset where often superior officers act like petty potentates. Living in this heavily military area and knowing countless guys and women in the military, one hears frequent stories of jackass superior officers (my mother ran a lab in the huge local Naval Hospital for decades and had many an unflattering story to tell as well). Unfortunately, moving up the ranks often involves ass-kissing and playing politics rather than true competence as a warrior and commander. Here are a few story highlights:

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An indictment of the war it was not. Lt. G's dispatches -- at turns hilarious, maddening and terrifying -- provided raw and insightful snapshots of a conflict many Americans have lost interest in. Word got around, and more and more readers closely followed the postings of 25-year-old Lt. Matthew Gallagher, with the site drawing tens of thousands of page views. By the time Kaboom went kaput last month -- Lt. G was ordered to take down his blog -- it had a following that would be the envy of many a small-town paper.

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The blog's downfall was a May 28 posting that, in violation of military blogging rules, Gallagher failed to have vetted by a supervisor. (That the posting depicted an officer in the unit unflatteringly might have played a role. Gallagher declined a request to comment.) The blogosphere, as it's wont to do, went berserk.

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Sometimes overtly, sometimes not, Lt. G wrote about what he saw as a widening disconnect between America and its warriors. His dispatches often read like a desperate call from a largely forgotten war. The Gravediggers received odd letters and care packages from strangers. Some were from older women probably looking for love. One was from someone in corporate America who somehow figured golf shirts would come in handy in a war zone. Then there were the letters from children, which spoke volumes about how many Americans have come to feel about this war.

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Gallagher, who is now a captain, was ordered to delete his blog. He did. The content remains on an archive blog one of his friends created: http://kaboomwarjournalarchive.blogspot.com. The old blog site is now controlled by City Girl, Gallagher's fiancee, who occasionally pens updates on the Gravediggers. Lt. Col. Steve Stover, a military spokesman, said in an e-mail that Kaboom was "deemed by the commander to be counter to good order and discipline of his unit."

Gays In Iraq Terrorized, Raped, Murdered

While allegedly protected by the same laws and invested with the same legal rights as other citizens in Iraq (why does that sound so familiar?), gays in reality face a very brutal reality. As CNN is somewhat belatedly reporting - gay sites have been discussing the sad reality for months and years - being gay exposes one to being terrorized, subjected to brutality and killed. Such are the fruits of religious fanaticism and the non-stop hatred of religious fundamentalists. For a glimpse of what the most extreme Christianists would mete out to gays, one need look no further than Iraq. The hatred is the same and only the degree of physical violence differs. Spiritually, murder occurs daily at the hands of both Islamic fundamentalists and Christian fundamentalist. Just as the "Godly Christians" who have blindly supported the Chimperator have been utterly silent about the slaughter of Iraqi women and children, they have likewise not uttered a sound over the killing of gays. Personally, I suspect that they condone the murder of both groups. WWJD? Here are some highlights from the CNN story:

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BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Kamal was just 16 when gunmen snatched him off the streets of Baghdad, stuffed him in the trunk of a car and whisked him away to a house. But the real terror was about to begin. The men realized he was gay, Kamal said, when he took his shirt off and they saw that his chest was shaved.

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"They told me to take off my clothes to rape me or they would kill me immediately. This moment was the worst moment in my life," he said, weeping as he spoke of the 2005 ordeal. "I was watching them taking off their clothes, preparing to rape me. I did not know what to do, so I started shouting loudly, 'Please do not do that! I will ask my family to give you whatever you want.' " He was held for 15 days, released only after his family paid a $1,500 ransom. He was raped every day. Only once, he said, was he allowed to talk to his family during captivity.

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Since the fall of Saddam Hussein in 2003, the situation for gays and lesbians in Iraq has deteriorated. Ridiculed under Hussein, many now find themselves the targets of violence, according to humanitarian officials. Lesbians are also victims of harassment and violence, but not nearly as often as gay men. It's unknown how many homosexuals have been killed by militias in the lawless streets of Iraq's cities, but some Web sites post pictures of Iraqis they say were killed for being gay. One photo . . . . shows a group of men standing around three male bodies sprawled on a street, blood pouring from their heads.

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A U.N. report on human rights in Iraq reinforces the accusations of violence. Although gays are supposed to be protected by law in Iraq, it says, they face extreme brutality. "Armed Islamic groups and militias have been known to be particularly hostile toward homosexuals, frequently and openly engaging in violent campaigns against them," the report said, adding that homosexuals have been murdered. "Militias are reportedly threatening families of men believed to be homosexual, stating that they will begin killing family members unless the men are handed over or killed by the family," it said.

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Both men hope to escape Iraq. They say their ideal destination would be San Francisco, California. For now, both of them keep their feelings secret. Kamal is still tormented by what happened to him nearly three years ago.

More Thursday Male Beauty

Why Foreign Opinion Matters

The Chimperator has done terrible damage to the image of the USA abroad. Reactionaries and Christianists think this doesn't matter and in addition hate Europeans because they generally do not embrace the mindset of the wingnut crowd. However, foreign public opinion DOES matter because it has a huge impact on (1) the ability of foreign governments to work with the USA while maintaining politcal capital at home, and (2) the desires of foreign nations to participate in US conceived ventures. The chart below shows clearly which candidate stands a better chance of re-establishing meaningful cooperation and resoring the image of America. Obviously, the McCain camp cannot be happy with the results.

Why Coming Out Was the Right Thing

Any readers who have been following this blog since its early days will know that coming out for me was a very wrenching experience and that it carried a very, very high cost. As I recently posted, looking back some six years later, I believe I did the right thing and would do it over again even though admittedly, I would handle some aspects differently with the benefit of hindsight. A reader who is currently in the closet and struggling with what course he should follow recently directed me to a blog called "Kids of Queers" and an interesting post by Anna, daughter of a gay man who came out after many years of marriage. I do not know if my children would identify with the writer's final conclusion, but from my prespective I believe much in the post is directly on point especially in terms of the cost of not coming out. In my own case, I am pretty confident that had I not come out, I'd be dead now. I recommend reading the full post, but here are some highlights:

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I mentioned in my previous post that I think my dad coming out was the right thing to do. Being on the family side of the coming out process, that is a hard position to take, a hard one to explain, and one that took a loong time to feel comfortable with. . . . I wish my dad wasn't gay. I wish he liked women, and I wish he wanted to be with my mom, and I wish they were still married and still in love. . . . But it's important for me to separate out the divorce issue from the gay issue. The gay issue caused the divorce issue, but the divorce is what robbed us of all the things I just mentioned. I would still miss those things if they'd divorced for another reason.

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But he is gay. I don't believe this is a choice. I believe this is the way he was born, and because of circumstances of his youth (upper crust Boston brahmin growing up in the 40's), he couldn't admit it to himself for a very, very long time. What's hard to measure is the untold price had he NOT come out. We know the price of his coming out, and it was very high for all of us. I'm coming to believe it was high for him too. But how bad would it have been if he never had come out and had lived with the secret forever?

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As for my dad....who knows if he would have made it? It is not uncommon for closeted gay people to become suicidal, and we all know the stories of closeted gay men who act out in dangerous ways that put their health, safety, and reputation at risk. Not to mention that there is always a fundamental benefit, even if it takes a very, very long time to see it, to honesty and personal integrity. Life is so, so, so, so short for all of us. How can I not wish for both my mom and my dad to be leading authentic lives? And had they stayed together, both would have been living a lie, even if only one of them knew it.

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Grace and strength can only come from truth. There is no shortcut, and there is no workaround. It may be impossible to believe, but everyone in your family will be better off in ten years than they would be if this secret remained in the dark. It took me years to believe this, but I finally do.

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If they do not feel this way now, I hope in time my children and my former wife will come to see the truth of Anna's conclusion. Living a false life and pretending to be who you are not, and hating yourself every day of your life because of it is so terribly destructive. A decent analysis of the stages of coming out can be found here.

Thursday Male Beauty

Dedicated to Elaine Donnelly (who no doubt would find this photo terrifying)

WP Column Trashes Elaine Donnelly

Regular readers know that I despise Elaine Donnelly, President of the so-called Center for Military Readiness, a Christianist created organization with two goals: (1) demonize gays constantly and keep them out of the military, and (2) push women from the military, apparently so that they remain in the home barefoot and pregnant. Would that Donnelly would take her own advice on the latter issue (although she looks so frigid, I suspect getting pregnant might be a challenge even if she were younger). Fortunately, at the hearings on DADT yesterday, Donnelly seems to have been at her most loopy and and came across as a nut case - which in my opinion is definitely the case - and spouted off lunatic statements notwithstanding her 100% lack of ANY experience in the military herself. Donnelly represents the true face and mindset of today's Christianists. People truly need to understand how crazy and consumed with hate these folks truly are and not just for gays - fortunately Donnelly helped educate the Armed Services Committee yesterday. In today's Washington Post, Dana Millbank lets Donnelly have it. Here are some highlights:

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Don't ask, don't tell. And, whatever you do, don't ask Elaine Donnelly to tell you what she thinks about gays in the military. The House Armed Services personnel subcommittee made just such a miscalculation yesterday. Holding the first hearing in 15 years on the "don't ask, don't tell" policy, lawmakers invited a quartet of veterans to testify on the subject and also extended an invitation to Donnelly, who has been working for years to protect our fighting forces from the malign influence of women.

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Donnelly treated the panel to an extraordinary exhibition of rage. She warned of "transgenders in the military." She warned that lesbians would take pictures of people in the shower. She spoke ominously of gays spreading "HIV positivity" through the ranks.

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Her written statement added warnings about "inappropriate passive/aggressive actions common in the homosexual community," the prospects of "forcible sodomy" and "exotic forms of sexual expression," and the case of "a group of black lesbians who decided to gang-assault" a fellow soldier. . . . . Inadvertently, Donnelly achieved the opposite of her intended effect. Though there's no expectation that Congress will repeal "don't ask, don't tell" and allow gays to serve openly in the military, the display had the effect of increasing bipartisan sympathy for the cause.

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Rep. Chris Shays (R-Conn.) pointed a finger at Darrah and glared at Donnelly. "Would you please tell me, Miss Donnelly, why I should give one twit about this woman's sexual orientation, when it didn't interfere one bit with her service?" Donnelly said something about "forced intimacy." Shays cut her off. "You're saying she has no right to serve her country because she happens to have a different sexual orientation than you."

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It was tempting to think that Donnelly had been chosen by Democrats to sabotage the case against open military service for homosexuals. But Republicans had consented to the witness panel, . . . . But it was Donnelly, founder and president of the Center for Military Readiness, who amused lawmakers the most.

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She further explained the "absolutely devastating" effect of homosexuals "introducing erotic factors" and made a comparison to Sen. Larry Craig's adventure at the Minneapolis airport. She said admitting gays to the military would be "forced cohabitation" and a policy of "relax and enjoy it." Murphy puffed his cheeks with air to calm himself. Rep. Ellen Tauscher (D-Calif.) said she was "shocked." Rep. Carol Shea-Porter (D-N.H.) said she was "embarrassed." Shays said it was "scurrilous" of Donnelly to talk about the menace of homosexual misconduct, because it would be punished the same way the military punishes heterosexual misconduct.

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Donnelly said something about her respect for the service of gay veterans. "How do you respect their service?" Shays demanded. "You want them out." Donnelly seemed to have unified the lawmakers -- against her. The next questioner was Rep. Joe Sestak (D-Pa.), a retired Navy vice admiral. "I couldn't ask it better than you did," he told Shays.

More Wednesday Male Beauty

National Review Column: DADT Needs to Go - UPDATED

UPDATE: Per live blogging by HRC, apparently, Elaine Donnelly made an ass of herself at the Congressional hearings on DADT (why am I not surprised?) and prompted a lot out outright laughter at her crazy statements. At one point, Arkansas Congressman Vic Snyder (D) admonished Donnelly for her outrageous claim that gay and lesbian servicemembers increase the risk for other soldiers contacting HIV and told her that, ironically, by her logic, she should only want to let lesbians into the military. Loud laughter all around. The woman truly needs to be in an institution under mental health care.

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Yes, it is a bit of a shock, but the National Review Online is carrying a column by one of its contributing editors slamming Don't Ask, Don't Tell ("DADT" and adamantly concluding that the policy needs to go. The piece also has some interesting statistics as to just how much the military has had to lower its standards to meet recruiting goals. Meanwhile, competent, educated, patriotic, law abiding gays have been forced out of the military. Common sense makes it clear that the policy was idiocy when adopted and has only become more stupid. It needs to go NOW. Elaine Donnelly (and closet cases like Robert Knight) will simply have to find a new group to victimize in order to have an orgasm or otherwise make herself (himself) feel better about her/his hate-filled, nasty self. Here are some highlights:

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As a House Armed Services subcommittee surely will discuss this afternoon, Pentagon officials evidently trust military inductees with felony rap sheets more than they do law-abiding gay GIs. Having relaxed academic, age, and weight restrictions to achieve recruitment goals, the Defense Department has granted “moral waivers” to criminal convicts. Simultaneously, it uses the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy to jettison gays in uniform, usually for merely disclosing their sexuality. This policy deserves a dishonorable discharge.

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Between 2006 and 2007, the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee recently revealed, convicted felons accepted by the Marine Corps rose 68 percent, from 208 to 350. Equivalent Army admissions rocketed 105 percent, from 249 to 511. Between 2003 and 2006, U.C. Santa Barbara’s Michael D. Palm Center calculates, “106,768 individuals with serious criminal histories were admitted” to the armed forces.

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Last year, the Army . . . admitted five rape/sexual-assault convicts, two felony child molesters, two manslaughter convicts, and two felons condemned for “terrorist threats including bomb threats.”

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Conversely, expelled military personnel include Arabic linguists and intelligence specialists who help crush America’s foes in the War on Terror. “Don’t Ask” has ousted at least 58 soldiers who speak Arabic, 50 Korean, 42 Russian, 20 Chinese, nine Farsi, and eight Serbo-Croatian — all trained at the prestigious Defense Language Institute. Al-Qaeda intercepts need translation, and Uncle Sam may need people who can walk around Tehran with open ears. Yet these dedicated gay citizens now are ex-GIs.

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A December 18, 2006 Zogby poll of 545 GIs who served in Iraq and Afghanistan found that 73 percent considered themselves comfortable among gays. Also, 23 percent said they knew gay people in their units, while 45 percent believed they did. So, 68 percent of GIs confirmed or imagined that they worked with gay colleagues, with no evident clamor for their ejection. If there is a gay-fueled crisis in unit morale and cohesion, it appears to have gone undetected.

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Today’s hearing of the House Armed Services Subcommittee on Military Personnel will consider what to do about this policy. Here is a simple idea. “Don’t Ask” should yield to equality: Sexual orientation should be irrelevant while inappropriate sexual conduct — gay, straight, or otherwise — should be punished. Our enemies are Islamofascists who murder Americans, not gay patriots who unravel terrorist plots and introduce jihadists to Allah.

Wednesday Male Beauty

"Brother Boy" and Sordid Lives

On a totally frivolous note, tonight is the series premier of the "Sordid Lives" on LOGO. If you haven't seen the original 1996 low budget film with a incredible cast of top talent, I recommend you rent the DVD. The movie is a scream and since much of the original cast has been signed for the series, it should be extremely funny as well. Having lived in Alabama and Texas in the past, I clearly can identify with the small town southern setting from places I experienced and the outrageous behavior of some of the characters. Although some of their traits are indeed somewhat universal. Leslie Jordan is hysterical as Brother Boy who believes he is Tammy Wynette. Here are some highlights from the Los Angeles Times:

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“Sordid Lives: The Series,” which premieres tonight on Logo, Viacom's LGBT-directed cable network, is a prequel to "Sordid Lives" (the movie), which was in turn adapted from "Sordid Lives" (the play). All were written and directed by Del Shores ("Queer as Folk," "Dharma & Greg"), whose range of accomplishment in diverse mediums makes him in a sense the Southern, white, gay Tyler Perry.

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Bonnie Bedelia, Rue McClanahan, Caroline Rhea and Olivia Newton-John (looking great, singing better than ever, and there is no irony intended in those words) are the names that should need no introduction; Leslie Jordan's is a slightly less familiar name but an immediately familiar face, even when he is made up as Tammy Wynette, which he is constantly. All but McClanahan and Rhea return from the film, as do the lesser known but superb Beth Grant, Ann Walker and Sarah Hunley, among others.

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The series splits its attention between Hollywood, where Ty (Jason Dottley) is trying to find work as an actor, and central Texas, where his relations are running farcically amok. The stories are connected only by phone calls between Ty, his "beautiful, controlling" mother, Latrelle (Bedelia), and his flamboyant Aunt LaVonda (Walker). . . . Also in Texas are Ty's grandmother Peggy (McClanahan), great aunt Sissy (Grant) and uncle Earl (Jordan), known as Brother Boy, who is in a mental institution, where an icy psychologist (Rosemary Alexander) plans to "de-homosexualize" him and where the death of Tammy Wynette leaves him suicidally distraught -- until he is visited by her spirit, played by Wynette's daughter, Georgette Jones, and told to carry on in her name.