Breaking the Republican Lock on God

For years now the Republican Party has claimed to be the party of god and god-fearing Christians - even though its policies over the last 20 years are diametrically opposed to Christ's social gospel message: feed the hungry, cloth the naked, give shelter to the homeless, care for the sick. The GOP instead wants to throw the poor in the gutter and to hope that the sick will conveniently die despite constant disingenuous statements of "thoughts and prayers" when it is social programs that are what is really needed.  Swarming to the GOP banner have been the evangelical Christian and far right Catholic crowd seemingly motivated solely by anti-abortion fervor and anti-gay hatred and a willingness to close their eyes to the anti-gospel agenda of the Republican Party.  Best representing this false Christianity are Mike Pence and "mother" his bigoted wife and, of course, the loud professional Christian set that rarely focuses on the issues Christ talked about and instead amasses personal wealth and strives for political power. This hypocrisy and anti-Christian behavior is now being repeatedly called out by unlikely sources: a gay Christian and a black woman in the persons of Pete Buttigieg and Stacy Abrams.  I left the GOP years ago when I concluded that one could not be a decent, moral person and remain a supporter of the GOP.  That belief has only intensified with Trump in the White House.  Whether one calls them-self a Christian or not - I typically do not since evangelicals have so sullied the label -  if you believe in the social gospel message, you cannot support the today's GOP.  A column in the New York Times looks at this much needed call for decent people to challenge the GOP and strip it of its claim to be the party of god.  Here are highlights:

We know that slaveholders in the American South used Scripture to justify keeping their fellow humans in bondage. They could find no words from Christ on this, for there are no words from him. Just a line in the New Testament from mere mortals presuming to speak for him.

But perhaps it made those who tore apart families, who whipped insubordinates until they passed out, who sold children and cotton bales as similar commodities feel better to know that the monstrous crime of their daily enterprise could be a blessed act.

These days, no less an authority than Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the White House press secretary, said recently that God “wanted Donald Trump to become president.”  She offered no sourcing for this assertion, as is the case for vaporous claims that rise from the rot of the Trump presidency on a daily basis.

Mocking Sanders and the many Ned Flanders of the G.O.P. team is unlikely to make much of a dent. Nearly half of all Republicans believe God wanted Trump to win the election. To them, secular snark is a merit badge on the MAGA hat.

But there is a better way to sway the electorate of faith, as the rising Democratic stars Pete Buttigieg and Stacey Abrams have shown us. They apply something like a “What Would Jesus Do?” test to rouse religious conscience on the political battlefield.

Buttigieg, the 37-year-old mayor of South Bend, Ind., is a Navy veteran who served in Afghanistan, a Rhodes scholar, married to a junior high school teacher. He’s gay and, more surprising for a modern Democrat, he is an out Christian, as quick to quote St. Augustine as Abraham Lincoln.

Like Abrams and Senator Cory Booker, Mayor Pete says his faith made him a progressive. Scripture directs him to defend the poor, the sick, the marginalized, the societal castoffs.

But Buttigieg goes much further than mere Bible-citing. He’s taking it directly to Trump and to Vice President Mike Pence, who flashes his piety like a seven-carat diamond on his pinkie finger. It’s hard to look at the actions of President Trump, Buttigieg said, “and believe they are the actions of somebody who believes in God.”

The mayor calls Pence the “cheerleader of the porn star presidency,” and he wonders whether the vice president “stopped believing in Scripture when he started believing in Donald Trump.”

Buttigieg’s marriage to Chasten Glezman “moved me closer to God,” he said in a speech last Sunday. To the “Mike Pences of the world,” he said, “your quarrel is not with me — your quarrel, sir, is with my creator.”

Abrams, who narrowly lost her race for governor of Georgia last year, also uses faith, part of a long African-American tradition, to marshal Christian principles against the repulsive acts of man. The daughter of two Methodist preachers, she said in one of her television ads, “My reading of the Bible says that Jesus Christ was a progressive.”

[W]hen a president is held up by his own spokeswoman as an extension of divine will, and that president is embraced by the evangelical community as a fulfillment of biblical prophecy, it’s fine to use the source material to fight back.

The best Christian argument against Trump comes from Christ. The essence of Christianity is his exhortation that people treat the sick, the hungry, the poor, the imprisoned as they would treat him. “Whatever you did to the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did to me.”

No one can know what’s in Trump’s heart. But his policies are inhumane in the extreme. Cursed are the meek, for under Trump’s command, children have been put in cages, and the poor in red states are denied the health care that should be available to them under Obamacare.

Trump is all about self. His bigotry, his boasting, his lies, his pride, his scams of the vulnerable, his worship of materialism, his insults of the dead, his turning a blind eye to refugees, his bragging of adulterous behavior, his treatment of “the least” among us — all of this is antithetical to Christian philosophy.

Buttigieg is right to call him on this. He’s right to attack Pence’s hypocrisy. But the moral high ground is a fragile perch, best visited on rare occasions. He’s thrown down a needed challenge. Now let Trump and Pence try to prove him wrong.

In what many of the "godly folk" would find ironic, most of the LGBT people I know are far more Christian - meaning they support Christ's social gospel message - than the evangelical crowd.  The vast majority of us oppose Trump and the GOP and we support the very social safety net that the GOP seeks to destroy.   Calling oneself Christian and parking your ass in a pew each Sunday doesn't prove one is Christian.  Rather it is how one approaches supporting feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, giving shelter to the homeless, caring for the sick and caring for refugees. The Pences of the world utterly fail this test.

Christofascists Go Berserk Over Book on Gay Christians

At times I ponder how one can become so fearful of uncertainty and anything that challenges a simple-minded (actually, an ignorance embracing), house of cards faith construct that one attacks anything and anyone that threatens their imaginary fantasy world.  Is it a form of mental illness that fuels such conduct?  It surely is not the behavior of normal, well adjusted people.  Yet this fear and reaction against thinking are the norms of today's Christofascists.  Anything and anyone who challenges their world view must be destroyed.  Hence their animus towards gays.  Hence their animus towards the theory of evolution, etc.  A new book on gay Christians has some of the "godly folk" in full spittle flecked conniption fits.  LGBTQ Nation looks at the reaction to “God and the Gay Christian,” by Matthew Vines (pictured above).  Here are some highlights:

A new book that debuts in print this week is already causing outrage and discordant reactions from right-wing American Christian conservatives, who have labeled the book a sham, shameful, inaccurate, and a misinterpretation of the basic tenets of the Christian faith.

The author, Matthew Vines, is a quiet and unassuming 24-year-old former Harvard university student from Wichita, Kan. His book, “God and the Gay Christian,” reexamines what the Christian bible actually says about same-sex relationships, and explores the biblical context and historical background regarding sexual orientation and gender identity.

Yet, judging from the outraged reactions to his new book by right-wing luminaries, one would think that Satan himself co-authored Vines’ latest project.

Vines’ new book is a straight-forward structured analysis, coupled with a well researched case, that refutes some common misconceptions of the biblical intent and instead argues for a biblical support of same-sex relationships. The book is 180 pages, followed by another 20 pages of footnotes, citations, and other documentation to make the author’s case.

But critics are quick to dismiss Vines research, and instead opt to reassert their own brand of anti-gay rhetoric, cultivated over years of their own biblical interpretations.

Matt Barber, . . . .  dismisses Vines as “a homosexual activist and Bible revisionist known for manipulating Christian terminology to advance the counter-Christian homosexualist agenda.”

Vines himself isn’t all that concerned.  “I think the backlash has just begun,” Vines tells LGBTQ Nation. “For conservative Christians who base their opposition to LGBT equality on Scripture, it can be unnerving to have their biblical interpretation challenged and undermined by other conservative Christians.”

“Most non-affirming evangelicals aren’t prepared to have this conversation about Scripture yet, so I think a fair amount of bluster will precede actual, widespread engagement with the arguments I’m putting forward,” he says.

“But at some point, the bluster will clearly fail, and even the most determined opponents will have to engage with these arguments,” adds Vines.   “God and the Gay Christian” by Matthew Vines is due to be released April 22, 2014.

Science, knowledge and archeology discoveries are all enemies to the Christofascists flimsy faith construct.  As time goes by only the most ignorant and mentally unhinged will remain clinging to the Christofascists' belief that the Bible is inerrant.  As it is, the human genome project has revealed that Adam and Eve never existed and, therefore, the whole Christian myth of "The Fall" crumbles into dust and Christ's mission of redemption becomes unnecessary.

Openly Gay Former College Kicker Tries for the NFL

Former Middle Tennessee State placekicker, Alan Gendreauis is openly gay and, as Out Sports reports, he intends to seek a place in the NFL.  Trailblazer or glutton for punishment, whatever the case may be, kudos to Gendreauis for his courage.  It goes without saying it will be interesting to watch his effort.  With recent reports that NFL recruiters tried to question some applicants about their sexual orientation it is certainly possible that Gendreauis could face discrimination regardless of his abilities as a kicker.  Here are highlights from the article:

Now with renewed purpose, Gendreau had made a potentially game-changing decision: It’s time for him to shoot for the stars again.

Gendreau had a record-breaking career at Middle Tennessee State.  With a PAT in his final game as a Blue Raider, he became the all-time leading scorer in Sun Belt Conference history with 295 points. His longest field goal in college, at 55 yards, was the second-longest ever in the conference. That was 12 yards short of the 67-yard field goals he connected on during team practices; it was even shorter than field goals he kicked in high school.

I first met Gendreau four years ago when Outsports ran an anonymous story by sociologist Eric Anderson about the gay kicker. Gendreau was a freshman at MTSU at the time, out to his teammates and embraced by them. He didn’t reveal his name publicly at the time because he feared how it would affect both his family and his shot at the NFL. 

Now openly gay and 23, with a deep-seated confidence in his sexual orientation, Gendreau wants another shot at the pros. This time, he wants to do it open and honest about who he is. This time, he wants to give it everything he has.  The Orlando, Fla., native knew he was gay at a very young age. He came out to friends and family at 16, started dating boys in high school and had on-again, off-again relationships with men through college.  "When you know, you know," he said with a smile.

Gendreau has also long been a devout Christian, raised in a deeply religious household. It’s a tough mix, being gay and Christian. When he came out to his parents in high school, they put him in church-based counseling. That lasted four sessions.

While some may worry that his sexual orientation would be questioned during his senior season slump, Davis said the team never considered it.

"I don't think his off-the-field lifestyle was questioned about that," Davis said. "It was more a question, ‘What's up with Gendreau? Why isn't he making kicks? Where is he mentally with his game?’ But I never heard anything about him being gay, it was just questions about why he was missing kicks.

"Football was the business, he was an employee and he did his job well," Davis added. "For people who had a relationship with him outside of football, he's a friendly, funny guy. He was just a normal guy. He was a football player."

There has never been a publicly out gay player in the NFL or Division I college football. Only six NFL players — from Dave Kopay in 1975 to Kwame Harris earlier this year — have come out publicly after retiring.  Many experts have long believed the first gay NFL player wouldn’t be a current athlete who comes out. Instead, he would be openly gay in high school and college and eventually make his way into the pros already out of the closet.  If he can make it to the NFL, Gendreau will fit that mold.

"His sexual orientation is not going to matter one bit," said super agent Leigh Steinberg, who has represented the likes of Hall of Famers Warren Moon, Troy Aikman and Thurman Thomas, among others. "The only thing that matters is if he can put that ball between those goal posts. If he can do that, and if he can do it consistently, he’ll have a shot at the NFL."

Gendreau’s best shot this season will be to secure an invitation to a team’s organized team activities (OTAs) over the next two months. That invitation could come from a team who attends a workout or sees a video highlighting his skills.

The next opportunity is a training camp in late July or August. Each team has two to three kickers at camp who are either competing for a job or, in the case of a team like the Patriots whose kicking position is locked up by Stephen Gostkowski, are competing for reps to showcase their talent to other teams.

In many ways, a place-kicker could be the perfect next step for gay visibility in the NFL. It’s the position on a team furthest removed from other players, not part of the offense or defense, but rather the "special" teams unit. A place-kicker only steps on the field for a handful of plays. Some former football players, like former 12-year offensive lineman and current ESPN personality Mark Schlereth, have long taken potshots at kickers, saying they’re not even football players.

It will be interesting to see how this all plays out.  I wish Gendreauis lots of luck.

Confessions of a Former Closet Case and "Ex-Gay" Survivor

As I've noted often before, I receive numerous request for advice or a sharing of life stories from readers around the world who worked desperately to convince themselves they were not gay, in some cases married and had children only to have the effort eventually fail and their artificial life collapse. Of course for those of us who are older, without the benefit of the Internet, we felt ourselves lone freaks on top of all our other negative baggage associated with trying to be what we were not and all too often buying into the religious brainwashing that being gay was sinful and horrible. It's a topic that I wrote about in detail as to my own experiences (the posts are sometimes none to pretty) in the early days of this blog. I came across a post on a blog called Rachel Held Evans that contains an interview of Justin Lee (pictured at left), the director of The Gay Christian Network (GCN), which seemed to parallel my own story in many ways. The interview also focuses on the falsity of the "ex-gay" ministries. Here are some highlights that I identified with:

Like other guys my age, when I'd hit puberty, I had begun to experience sexual attractions. No surprise there. But one thing was different: while all of my guy friends were starting to notice girls for the first time, I was starting to notice guys.

At first, I didn't worry about it. I figured this was just part of the process and that my attractions would eventually switch to girls. But they didn't. Instead, the feelings just kept getting stronger and stronger. Even if I could make it through the school day without thinking about guys, I'd go to bed at night and dream about guys. I'd wake up each morning feeling dirty and disgusted with myself.

As you might expect, I was horrified by this. I couldn't tell anyone, and I didn't know what was wrong with me. It got to the point that I was crying myself to sleep, night after night, begging God to take away these feelings. It wasn't until I was 18 (and dating a beautiful girl I had no attraction to whatsoever) that I finally realized there was a word for people like me: "gay."

Even then, though, I was convinced it was a phase. I was sure that God didn't design me to be gay, so I looked into every Christian ministry I could find that offered to help gay people become straight. I was completely convinced that an "ex-gay" ministry, combined with therapy and prayer, would help me become attracted to women and put these other feelings behind me. After all, God can do anything!

The hard truth was that it doesn't work that way. Yes, God can do anything, but that doesn't mean God does do what we expect. I met so many people who had faith to move mountains and who had prayed and struggled their whole lives to become straight, but their attractions had still never changed. Even the national leaders and "success stories" of these change ministries privately admitted to me that they hadn't become straight. Yes, some of them had married a member of the opposite sex, but the "happily heterosexual" face they showed to the world was not the reality. I heard more tragic stories behind closed doors than I can possibly convey.

As I turned to my church and the Christians I respected most to get their support, things only got worse. Christian groups kicked me out or turned their backs on me when they learned that I was gay, . . . . That was the realization that led me to create a safe space on the internet for people who want to live out their faith and explore these difficult questions, even if they come to conclusions that are different from my own. That's where The Gay Christian Network came from.

[A] lot of gay people are incredibly wounded, having been theologically "battered" over and over by misguided Christians. I cannot possibly convey how much damage Christians have done to our own cause by approaching the gay community in hurtful ways.

This damage, then, makes it very difficult for churches to offer even appropriate and loving correction—the kind we all need. Have you ever seen a dog that's been abused its whole life? They run and cower in the corner if you even try to approach them to pet them. A lot of us feel like that when dealing with conservative Christians, frankly.

[T]he church gets it really wrong. When a young man is gay, the message he gets isn't to wait until the right time; it's that there will never be a right time. Not only that; he's told that his sex drive itself—not even lust but just the temptation he feels—is a horrible sin, something that may condemn him to hell even if he never acts on it. Kids who hear these messages feel trapped. They've been made to feel that they're condemned even if they follow all the rules, and many grow to hate themselves.

I do not agree with all of Lee's views and have personally found it harder and harder to be involved in any institutional church, although my ELCA parish does make me feel welcome and valued. Each of us needs to find his/her own comfort zone. The main point that I do agree with is the importance of stop hating yourself and the need to avoid subjecting yourself to abusive churches (e.g., why I'm no longer Catholic).

Italian Catholic Bishop: Gays Shouldn’t be Given Funerals

One has to wonder whether the Catholic Church hierarchy can get any more tone deaf - particularly with the exploding sex abuse scandal in Europe increasingly directly implicating Pap Ratzi more with each passing day. About the only things that has not happened - at least not yet - is for allegations to arise that Ratzinger was a predator himself. But that did not stop Italian Bishop Francesco Nolè from the city of Tursi (pictured at left) from further underscoring the Church's hypocrisy by stating that homosexuals should not receive communion or be given funerals. My question for the gay hating bishop is this: then what is the Church going to do with bishops, cardinals and Popes that enabled and covered up the sexual abuse of thousands and thousands of children and youths? No communion for them and no funerals? It would seem a fitting punishment, would it not (excluding extended jail time, of course)? Nolè's statement shows that the Church hierarchy is utterly obsessed with things sexual and gay sex in particular. As experience has shown, typically its the self-hating closet cases that make such remarks, so one cannot help but wonder about the good bishop's own sexual identity issues. Here are highlights from Pink Paper.com:
*
The bishop of the city of Tursi has declared homosexuals should not receive communion or be given funerals.
*
In an interview published last Friday on pontifex.roma.it, a website created to ‘prove and defend Christianity’, Bishop Francesco Nolè declared that ‘irregulars’ such as criminals and homosexuals should not be given communions or funerals. This, he said, is not to be seen as discrimination, but rather as ‘healthy medicine’ for those close to the person: “Our behaviour, which could be perceived as mean or cruel, in the long-run often heals and evangelises.”
*
He added: “We must have the courage and tact, perhaps first informing the individual, or the families if he has passed, that it’s not possible to administer a communion or funeral. We would perhaps pray for his soul, which must be done.”
*
He went on to say: “The church, with its eternal obsession with compassion, is or has already succumbed. Homosexual couples or those who are divorced and re-married are being called ‘irregulars’ instead of ‘public sinners’, and so the concept of sin itself goes down the drain.
*
“Nothing surprises me anymore. Homosexuality, which is a disease, has become something normal. They sprout like poisonous mushrooms, and instead of feeling shame they celebrate this plague and the church itself minimalises these sins. Homosexuality itself is not a sin, you can’t punish a sufferer. But it becomes one when the abomination is practised. It’s disgraceful.”
*
No sir, what's disgraceful is hypocrites like yourself and the damage you do to others as a result of your own f*cked up psychological problems.

Christianists: "Homosexual Christians" an Oxymoron

Recently, Christian researcher George Barna did a survey of of LGBT adults as a basis for his report entitled "Spiritual Profile of Homosexual Adults"which found that many gays did NOT fit the Christianist stereotype disseminated by the professional Christian set. Among the Barna Group findings that professional homophobes found heretical are the following:

*

“People who portray gay adults as godless, hedonistic, Christian bashers are not working with the facts,” declared the best-selling author of numerous books about faith and culture. “A substantial majority of gays cite their faith as a central facet of their life, consider themselves to be Christian, and claim to have some type of meaningful personal commitment to Jesus Christ active in their life today.

*

“It is interesting to see that most homosexuals, who have some history within the Christian Church, have rejected orthodox biblical teachings and principles – but, in many cases, to nearly the same degree that the heterosexual Christian population has rejected those same teachings and principles. Although there are clearly some substantial differences in the religious beliefs and practices of the straight and gay populations, there may be less of a spiritual gap between straights and gays than many Americans would assume.”

*

Not surprisingly, these conclusions were enough to make the holier than thou set at OneNewsNow have convulsions and verge on foaming at the mouth. Mr.Barna received less than loving treatment for his report that undercuts many of the rantings so common at OnNewsNow and among the self-righteous, self-satisfied Christianist set. Here are some highlights from the OneNewsNow reaction to the Barna report (Note how Peter LaBarbera who has made a career out of maligning gays is quoted as an authority):

*

Peter LaBarbera, president of Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, believes Barna speaks "too cavalierly" about "homosexual Christians." "My test is [to] substitute another sexual sin and see if it makes sense. Would we be talking about a survey of porn-using Christians or incestuous Christians? That sounds stark, but that's, I believe, the appropriate biblical analogy," he contends. Barna, LaBarbera says, is naive if he thinks the homosexual activist movement is not made up of "hedonistic Christian bashers."

*

"I think there are Christians who struggle with the sin of homosexuality -- but proud homosexual Christians? That's an oxymoron to me in the same way as I would say proud adulterous Christians," he adds. "And so, I think we have to be very careful because I see the tactic of the Emergent Church and the Christian left is to start talking more and more about 'gay Christians,' and what they end up doing is demonizing the so-called 'Religious Right' and saying that the Religious Right is all wrong in the way it has talked about homosexuality."

*

A book by Barna Group president Dave Kinnaman titled UnChristian contends that "hostility toward gays has become virtually synonymous with the Christian faith;" however, LaBarbera says he does not know any born-again Christians who hate homosexuals.

*

Hmm, funny ting is that while LaBarbera says he knows no born-again Christians who hate gays, yet he daily disseminates lies and untruths about LGBT Americans and regularly equates our relationships to incest, adultery, child molestation, and other heinous conduct. That's not hate? Sure sounds and looks like it to me. Of course, LaBarbera is terrified of gays achieving equality since it would largely put him out of a job and force him to find gainful employment.

Welcoming Christians

I talk a great deal about the less than Christian "godly Christians" who make the dissemination of anti-gay hatred and lies the lynch pin of their alleged Christian faith. In addition to gays, many of these churches and professional Christian organizations like Focus on the Family (and its Virginia affiliate, The Family Foundation), Family Research Council, American Family Association, and Concerned Women for America, hate many more people and groups besides just gays. Blacks, Hispanics, non-Christians, and immigrants are also on the roster of classes of people these un-godly folk would just as soon see disappear from the American landscape. In short, the version of Christianity that they peddle is a strong indictment against anyone wanting to be called a Christian.

*

Often lost in all of this hate filled noise is the fact that there ARE churches and denominations which are welcoming to all. I was reminded of this today when the boyfriend and I attended the baptism of my office manager's young daughters at a small Evangelical Lutheran Church of America parish. Performing the baptisms was the Bishop of Virginia's assistant, a full ordained pastor in her own right, and also in attendance were my young paralegal and his boyfriend and the secretary for the Bishop's office (which sub-lets space from me) and her husband and family. The church is much smaller than my ELCA parish in the Ghent area of Norfolk, but there was the same feeling that all were welcomed. Indeed, we two gay couples were warmly embraced and not a soul flinched when the four of us, each with our respective partner, went up to the communion rail were we received communion from the Bishop's assistant. This is the face of true Christian conduct and what - at least in my view - all Christian denominations should be like.

*

As retired Episcopal bishop John Shelby Spong has written often, the ultra- conservative, anti-gay Christians over the long term are killing Christianity. With increased medical and mental health knowledge about sexual orientation and ever expanding scientific knowledge on a host of issues, at some point either the rigid Bible beating form of Christianity must adapt to the modern, educated world, or else it will eventual die as it becomes ever more irrelevant and looks increasingly as nothing more than ancient superstitious belief used as an excuse for bigotry. In short, some of those who most loudly proclaim that they love their faith - and it's usually the far right element that do this - are the ones making the strongest argument for Christianity's demise due to their hatred of so many people and intolerance for anyone not precisely like themselves.

Gospel Singer Shares Coming Out Journey

Yesterday's Washington Blade carried a story about gospel singer, Ray Boltz's coming out saga. There are many things that Boltz relates - he was married 33 years and has four children - with which I identify very strongly based on my own experience. Living a lie and trying to be straight ultimately becomes so exhausting. Like me, Boltz finally reached a point where he simply could not go on denying who he was and had to face up to it. I hope he finds the peace and self-acceptance I have found after so many years of unhappiness.

*

Not surprisingly, there are a few nasty comments posted on the article by wingnut "Christians" who are so terribly threatened by the fact that just maybe the Bible doesn't have all the facts correct when it comes to sexual orientation or other issues. To me, those who fear homosexuality have a weak, simplistic faith that is all too easily threatened by anything less than a literal reading of 2000+ year old writings written by scientifically ignorant, tribal authors. I applaud Boltz's courage for finally admitting who he is. Here are some story highlights (I recommend a full read of the article):

*

Ray Boltz was tired of living a lie. He’d gotten to a point nearly three years before where he couldn’t continue down the road his life had gone. His 33-year marriage to ex-wife Carol was, he says, largely a happy one. It produced four children — three daughters and a son who are now between 22 and 32 — but family life and going through the motions of being straight had grown so wearying to Boltz, he was in a serious depression, had been in therapy for years, was on Prozac and other anti-depressants and had been, for a time, suicidal.

*

Continuing to pretend, Boltz says, was no longer an option. “I’d denied it ever since I was a kid. I became a Christian, I thought that was the way to deal with this and I prayed hard and tried for 30-some years and then at the end, I was just going, ‘I’m still gay. I know I am.’ And I just got to the place where I couldn’t take it anymore … when I was going through all this darkness, I thought, ‘Just end this.’”

*

“You get to be 50-some years old and you go, ‘This isn’t changing.’ I still feel the same way. I am the same way. I just can’t do it anymore.’”There was some exploration of “ex-gay” therapy though Boltz never attended an “ex-gay” camp or formal seminar.“I basically lived an ‘ex-gay’ life — I read every book, I read all the scriptures they use, I did everything to try and change.”

*

His physical relationship with his wife hadn’t been torturous. He says it helped that he felt genuine affection for her, if not sexual desire.“Sex was based on the fact that we loved each other and I wanted to make her happy,” he says. “I had sexual drives as well. You know, it’s like I never had to talk myself into having a relationship with her or that I was going, ‘Oh God, here we’re going to bed again’ — it wasn’t that. I loved her and we had a very full life; it’s just that inside, deep inside, it really wasn’t who I was.” Aside from sex, Boltz says this eventually took a toll on the couple’s intimacy.

*

His faith was in transition — tenants he’d adhered to all his life suddenly were up for reconsideration, but there was a peace he hadn’t felt before.“I had a lot of questions [about faith], but at the bottom of everything was a feeling that I didn’t hate myself anymore, so in that sense I felt closer to God."

*

He doesn’t want to get into debates about scripture and has no plans to “go into First Baptist or an Assembly of God church and run in there and say, ‘I’m gay and you need to love me anyway.’”For him, the decision to come out is much more personal.“This is what it really comes down to,” he says. “If this is the way God made me, then this is the way I’m going to live. It’s not like God made me this way and he’ll send me to hell if I am who he created me to be … I really feel closer to God because I no longer hate myself.””

Fire and Brimstone

A church in Columbus, Ohio, is displaying a sign which no doubt would be well received by Sarah Palin and her fellow churchgoers as aell as a good percentage of the attendees of the Republican Party Convention. Especially now that the GOP has become an unofficial religion based party. The sign was posted in reaction to Katy Perry's pop song lyrics "I kissed a girl and I liked it" which flirts with same-sex attraction. To me, the sign is illustrative of the Christianist mind set on display in St. Paul at the GOP Convention: condemn those who are different and subconsciously endorse the concept that these "others" can be mistreated with impunity. It's hardly the message of the Gospels, but it is the core of the Christianist religious beliefs. Here are some highlights from the Columbus Dispatch:

*

I kissed a girl and I liked it. Those lyrics have made Katy Perry's pop song a big hit on the radio.
But when a local church put the song lyrics on its marquee -- followed by the words then I went to hell -- some people got angry. People driving by Havens Corners Church in Blacklick yesterday morning noticed the sign, aimed to warn people about what the church says is the sin of homosexuality.

*

[Rev. Dave Allison] said "We meant that as a loving warning to teens. … The Scriptures tell us that you should not do what the song tells you to do. The Scriptures are not ambiguous on this issue."

*

Lynne Bowman, director of Equality Ohio, a gay and transgender advocacy group, said every church has a right to its beliefs. Havens Corners has made it clear to everyone who drives by that it is not a welcoming place that accepts all people, she said. She noted that the church's vision, stated on its Web site, is to grow in membership. "Obviously they're making a statement as to how they don't want to do that," she said.

*

She said Equality Ohio has identified at least 300 churches in Ohio that welcome gay people looking for a church home. "That sign just tells them where they cannot go to find the love and faith in Christ," she said.

Rowan Williams Prostitutes Himself for "Unity"

One outcome of the Lambeth Conference is that it has become increasingly clear that Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams has thrown gays under the bus in order to maintain "unity" within the Anglican Communion and keep homophobic bishops (predominantly from Africa where an ignorant, uneducated population allows them to be anti-gay demagogues) from bolting from the Communion. Had denominations in the USA employed that mentality during the 1850's and 1860's I suspect slavery would have continued for far longer and the Civil War might have been averted or delayed in occurring. Unity for the sake of unity and at the price of doing what's morally wrong is no victory. Sometimes doing the right thing is not universally popular and some may take there toys and walk away. Better in my view to be right than go with the herd in the wrong direction. Moreover, Rowan Williams isn't even being consistent with his past writings. I believe that the Bishop of Washington, D.C., has the better understanding of what's right. Here are some highlights from the [London] Timesonline concerning Williams' sell out of gays:

*

Rowan Williams believes that gay sexual relationships can “reflect the love of God” in a way that is comparable to marriage, The Times has learnt. Gay partnerships pose the same ethical questions as those between men and women, and the key issue for Christians is that they are faithful and lifelong, he believes. Dr Williams is known to be personally liberal on the issue but the strength of his views, revealed in private correspondence shown to The Times, will astonish his critics.

*

As Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr Williams recommitted the Anglican Communion to its orthodox position that homosexual practice is incompatible with Scripture at the Lambeth Conference, which closed on Sunday. However, in an exchange of letters with an evangelical Christian, written eight years ago when he was Archbishop of Wales, he described his belief that biblical passages criticising homosexual sex were not aimed at people who were gay by nature.

*

He wrote: “I concluded that an active sexual relationship between two people of the same sex might therefore reflect the love of God in a way comparable to marriage, if and only if it had about it the same character of absolute covenanted faithfulness.” Dr Williams described his view as his “definitive conclusion” reached after 20 years of study and prayer.

*

Liberals have been bitterly disappointed that a man whom they regarded as chosen to advance their agenda has instead abided by the traditionalist consensus of the majority.
*

In contrast to Williams' mealy mouth sell out of gay Christians, here are highlights from Timesonline of what John Chane, Bishop of Washington, D.C. (pictured above), has to say concerning the reactionary homophobes like Archbishop Peter Akinola of Nigeria (who I view as anything but a Christian except in name) who are pushing an anti-gay jihad:

*

A leading Anglican bishop has condemned conservatives as "demonic" for using his church as a punch bag. The Bishop of Washington, the Right Rev John Chane, a leading liberal in the Episcopal Church in the United States, accused conservatives of leading the church in a "dangerous" direction. Bishop Chane, whose diocese covers the American capital, said: "I think it's really very dangerous when someone stands up and says, 'I have the way and I have the truth and I know how to interpret holy scripture and you are following what is the right way.' "I think it's really very, very dangerous and I think it's demonic ... the Episcopal Church has been demonised.

*

Peter Akinola, the Nigerian primate, who is among those boycotting Lambeth, told the BBC: "Gafcon is a rescue mission - it is our duty to rescue whatever is left of the church from error, from all those, whoever they are, who have chosen to mutilate, to distort and to even deny the Gospel and to preach something different from what we know."

Cease 'Spiritual Violence' Against Gays

This column in the Dallas Morning News authored by the chairman of the church council of University United Methodist Church in Madison, Wisconsin, puts into words what I have often tried to explain to non-gay accepting Christians both in my own denomination, the Evangelical Lurtheran Church in America ("ELCA"), and in other denominations and settings, including as a guest speaker on a few occasions in a college religion class where I spoke as a "gay Christian." This well stated message is especially timely as the ELCA begins to discuss a new statement on human sexuality. There are definintely elements in the ELCA who would rather maintain order and avoid division even at the cost of doing wrong in terms of the treatment and acceptance of LGBT individuals. Here are some highlights:

*

Many voices from across The United Methodist Church are suggesting there is no way forward in the 36-year-long dialogue about the role and status of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people in the church. Declaring an impasse, these voices call for an end to this dialogue in the name of peace and unity.

*
Forty-five years ago, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. wrote a now-famous letter from a jail cell in Birmingham, Ala., to a group of white clergy (including two Methodist bishops) who--in the name of "unity" and "peace"--had publicly called on King and his allies to cease their disturbing nonviolent protests against racial segregation.

*
King wrote that the "great stumbling block" in the African-American struggle for equality was not blatant bigotry, "but the white moderate, who is more devoted to 'order' than to justice, who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice."

*

I embrace our Wesleyan Christian vision of "making disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world" . . . Yet we undercut these same goals when we continue to: 1) reject the gifts and graces of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender persons and their allies; 2) turn off a younger generation that views the Christian faith as "anti-homosexual;" 3) push LGBT youth into poverty and homelessness as families reject them because church and society stigmatizes LGBT persons; and 4) fail to address the role that ignorance and stigmatization of homosexuality (and other sexualities) play in the global AIDS epidemic.

*

The United Methodist Church cannot enjoy true peace and unity while it engages in injustice and spiritual violence against some of its members. Biblical peace does not refer to the apparent absence of conflict, and still less to the suppression of dialogue. In the Bible, "peace" ("shalom" in Hebrew) is a holistic concept that includes justice and total well-being.

*

These acts, justified by labeling LGBT people as "unrepentant sinners" inferior to all the "repentant sinners" in the church, are acts of spiritual violence, harming the souls of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender persons. It is tragic that being from a devout Christian family has been identified as a risk factor for suicide among LGBT youths.

Barack Obama and Reverend Wright: An Agnostic's Take

I received an e-mail from a reader who gave me a link to a post he did concerning the recent flap over Reverend Jeremiah Wright who has now resigned from involvement with the Obama campaign due to various inflamatory and disparaging remarks he has made. The post can be found here: http://my.barackobama.com/page/community/post/malikgravespryor/gGBzv2. I believe Malik does a good job in looking at the conflicted feelings Obama may hve about Wright which by no means indicates the Obama agrees with or supports Wright's views. I would encourage readers to check out the post. As he points out the Rev. Wright married Barack and Michelle Obama. He baptized his children. He guided Barack Obama to Christianity and took him into the community when he came to Chicago. Thus, it is difficult to reject the person whom has played a role in important benchmarks that occur in one's life.

More importantly, Malik also discusses the conflict many gays encounter in coming to terms with who they are and their sexual orientation versus the religious environment in which they were raised. Malik dealt with the conflict in one way by leaving Christianity, while others such as myself often struggle still at times with reconciling one's faith and the all too often hatefilled anti-gay Christian community. A number of things that he says resonate with me having been raised in a conservative Catholic environment and ultimately walking away from that faith tradition. Here are some highlights:

I grew up in the Christian faith at the Emanuel Temple Church in Brooklyn, NY under District Elder, and Pastor, Tommy Lee Seals. As someone who had a childhood filled with many good father figures, but never that singular father, Pastor Seals provided me with much guidance on my path toward adulthood.

It is one of the reasons that walking away from the Christian faith was so difficult for me. It felt, in a way, walking away from my relationship with him. While growing up, I realized that I was different than others around me. When the other boys were talking about the girls that were developing in front of their eyes, I was instead looking at them. And it terrified me. The Pentecostal denomination of the Christian faith is not one that is particularly forgiving when it comes to homosexuality. Neither is the black community at large.

I listened to the sermons of the man I looked up to, sermons that in many memorable cases demonized gay people. I listened with growing horror and self-loathing at my burgeoning feelings as I entered and progressed through puberty, hearing speech of "those people" who were destined for hell. "Those people" who should never be allowed near children. "Those people" who fornicated in filth and were no better than gutter trash. In light of these sermons and my own readings of the Bible, as well as my strongly held belief that you cannot cherry pick your faith simply to fit the particulars of your individual life, that I walked away from Christianity.

Despite my burgeoning problems with the orthodoxy surrounding the nature of faith and the calls to accept it blindly and without question, it was truly my sexuality that finally pushed me to walk away. It was, in the end, the tipping point. I could either go insane as a closeted gay man in an anti-gay, anti-me faith, or I could walk away from my faith and answer the questions I had about it, regardless of sexuality. And yet, despite the trauma of growing up gay in the black community, in the incendiary Pentecostal faith, could I curse the man who I saw as a father figure then, and hope would see me as an accomplished young man today? Who would look at the sum of my life and pronounce himself proud of me?

I left Christianity at 17yrs old, 13 years ago. And yet, the answer to that question has to be unequivocally no. Despite all of my disagreements with the Christian faith, whether it be on homosexuality, the validity of other belief systems, science, and many other topics. Despite all of the psychological pain I endured, it would be exceedingly difficult to do what Barack Obama is in the process of doing today.

Evangelical Lutheran Church of America - Update

There was some encouraging news for LGBT members of the ELCA today. I am particularly pleased that the measure discussed below pasted by over a 100 vote margin. Here's part of a story on 365gay.com and also from the ECLA's web site:

(Chicago, Illinois) A national assembly of Evangelical Lutherans urged its bishops Saturday to refrain from defrocking gay and lesbian ministers who violate a celibacy rule, but rejected measures that would have permitted ordaining gays churchwide. Still, advocates for full inclusion of gays were encouraged, calling the resolution a powerful statement in support of clergy with same-gender partners. The conservative group Lutheran CORE, however, said bishops will now feel more secure in ignoring denomination policy. The 538-431 vote came on the final day of a week long meeting in Chicago - and after emotional debate over how the denomination should interpret what the Bible says about homosexuality.

In the adopted resolution, the assembly "urges and encourages" bishops to either refrain from or "demonstrate restraint in disciplining" ministers who are in a "mutual, chaste and faithful committed same-gender relationship." "This is huge," said Phil Soucy of Lutherans Concerned/North America, which lobbies on behalf of gays and lesbians. "More than half of the people in the Churchwide Assembly have said don't punish anyone for what is a simple violation of the policy, where the offense is simply that they have a partner."

In this area, there are a great many gay Catholics who no longer feel welcome in the Roman Catholic Church. In my view, the ELCA could be a great alternative for these individuals who want a familiar service and church setting, but who cannot bring themselves to attend a Catholic Church services since the Vatican finds gays "objectively disordered." As for conservatives in the ELCA who opposed this resolution, I ask them to ask themselves this question: does marginalizing gays make God happy, or does it make you feel better about yourself and make you feel superior?