Gay Couple Sues United Airlines for Intentional Harrassment

Over a year ago I wrote here about the travesty done to a young professional gay couple from Norfolk by employees of United/Continental Airlines at George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas.  In response to demand letters, the leadership of the airline basically "flipped the bird" to these innocent victims and victimized them yet again - even though United/Continental Airlines claims to be LGBT friendly through their involvement with the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (at all times relevant to this story, the couple have themselves been members of the NGLCC).  As the saying goes, actions speak louder than words.  And Continental's actions have spoken volumes.  The tape on the bag pictured above clearly reads "Continental Airlines" and tellingly, the zipper on the bag was undamaged, so that there was no legitimate basis for taping up the bag while unzipped.

The actions against this couple by United/Continental employees were both shocking and done with malice.  Dissatisfied with Continental's insulting response, the couple have filed a lawsuit in Harris County, Texas District Court.  The lawsuit is styled Bridgeman, et al v. United Continental Holdings, Inc. and Continental Airlines, Inc., and was filed on Friday, August 24, 2012.  As yet, no case number has been assigned to the case.  The theories for recovery against United/Continental include intentional infliction of emotional distress, invasion of privacy, and negligence.  Both compensatory damages and exemplary damages are being sought.

Here are the facts as laid out in the lawsuit:

On May 21, 2011, Plaintiff's a homosexual couple, were returning from vacation on a flight provided by Defendants United Continental Holdings, Inc., and Continental Airlines, Inc. (collectively referred to as "Continental") from Costa Rica to Norfolk, Virginia with a layover at George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas.  When Plaintiffs arrived at Houston, they retrieved their checked luggage, which was undisturbed at that time.  After going through Customs, Plaintiffs rechecked their bags, and proceeded to board their flight to Norfolk.  Upon arriving in Norfolk, Plaintiffs exited the aircraft and went to the baggage claim area.  Plaintiffs' bags were sent to the baggage carousel where Plaintiffs discovered to their horror, that a private sex toy had been removed from one of their bags, covered with a greasy foul-smelling substance, and taped prominently to the top of their bag.

Plaintiffs experienced extreme shock and horror when they observed the above described bag and when observing the surprised and/or laughing faces of numerous onlookers in the baggage claim area.  Plaintiffs were experiencing such a high degree of shock and embarrassment that they felt compelled to call two friends to come to the airport to assist them. Fortunately, the friends arrived and were able to assist Plaintiffs out of the airport and to their home, but by that time the damage had already been done, and Plaintiffs had suffered severe emotional trauma.

.   .   .   It was one or more of Defendants' employees that searched through Plaintiffs' private items contained in their bag with no feasible basis, removed the sex toy, defiled the sex toy, and taped it on display with the intent to inflict extreme emotional distress and mental anguish upon Plaintiffs.  Because of the fact that the sex toy was contained in the bag of a male, and because the employee(s) responsible knew that the bag belonged to a male due to the name tag attached to the bag and the male clothing contained in the bag, there is a high likelihood that these egregious actions were directed towards Plaintiffs because they are homosexual and because they are males.        

The couple is represented by the law firm of Faubus & Scarborough LLP based in Houston, Texas.

For full disclosure, I know this couple (pictured below) well - they are among my closest friends - and they are not crack pots.  What had been done to their luggage was observed by an entire plane load of people.  It should also be noted that what was done to them could happen to anyone, gay or straight, young or old.   No one should have this type of travesty intentionally done to them.

Confessions of a Former Closet Case and "Ex-Gay" Survivor

As I've noted often before, I receive numerous request for advice or a sharing of life stories from readers around the world who worked desperately to convince themselves they were not gay, in some cases married and had children only to have the effort eventually fail and their artificial life collapse. Of course for those of us who are older, without the benefit of the Internet, we felt ourselves lone freaks on top of all our other negative baggage associated with trying to be what we were not and all too often buying into the religious brainwashing that being gay was sinful and horrible. It's a topic that I wrote about in detail as to my own experiences (the posts are sometimes none to pretty) in the early days of this blog. I came across a post on a blog called Rachel Held Evans that contains an interview of Justin Lee (pictured at left), the director of The Gay Christian Network (GCN), which seemed to parallel my own story in many ways. The interview also focuses on the falsity of the "ex-gay" ministries. Here are some highlights that I identified with:

Like other guys my age, when I'd hit puberty, I had begun to experience sexual attractions. No surprise there. But one thing was different: while all of my guy friends were starting to notice girls for the first time, I was starting to notice guys.

At first, I didn't worry about it. I figured this was just part of the process and that my attractions would eventually switch to girls. But they didn't. Instead, the feelings just kept getting stronger and stronger. Even if I could make it through the school day without thinking about guys, I'd go to bed at night and dream about guys. I'd wake up each morning feeling dirty and disgusted with myself.

As you might expect, I was horrified by this. I couldn't tell anyone, and I didn't know what was wrong with me. It got to the point that I was crying myself to sleep, night after night, begging God to take away these feelings. It wasn't until I was 18 (and dating a beautiful girl I had no attraction to whatsoever) that I finally realized there was a word for people like me: "gay."

Even then, though, I was convinced it was a phase. I was sure that God didn't design me to be gay, so I looked into every Christian ministry I could find that offered to help gay people become straight. I was completely convinced that an "ex-gay" ministry, combined with therapy and prayer, would help me become attracted to women and put these other feelings behind me. After all, God can do anything!

The hard truth was that it doesn't work that way. Yes, God can do anything, but that doesn't mean God does do what we expect. I met so many people who had faith to move mountains and who had prayed and struggled their whole lives to become straight, but their attractions had still never changed. Even the national leaders and "success stories" of these change ministries privately admitted to me that they hadn't become straight. Yes, some of them had married a member of the opposite sex, but the "happily heterosexual" face they showed to the world was not the reality. I heard more tragic stories behind closed doors than I can possibly convey.

As I turned to my church and the Christians I respected most to get their support, things only got worse. Christian groups kicked me out or turned their backs on me when they learned that I was gay, . . . . That was the realization that led me to create a safe space on the internet for people who want to live out their faith and explore these difficult questions, even if they come to conclusions that are different from my own. That's where The Gay Christian Network came from.

[A] lot of gay people are incredibly wounded, having been theologically "battered" over and over by misguided Christians. I cannot possibly convey how much damage Christians have done to our own cause by approaching the gay community in hurtful ways.

This damage, then, makes it very difficult for churches to offer even appropriate and loving correction—the kind we all need. Have you ever seen a dog that's been abused its whole life? They run and cower in the corner if you even try to approach them to pet them. A lot of us feel like that when dealing with conservative Christians, frankly.

[T]he church gets it really wrong. When a young man is gay, the message he gets isn't to wait until the right time; it's that there will never be a right time. Not only that; he's told that his sex drive itself—not even lust but just the temptation he feels—is a horrible sin, something that may condemn him to hell even if he never acts on it. Kids who hear these messages feel trapped. They've been made to feel that they're condemned even if they follow all the rules, and many grow to hate themselves.

I do not agree with all of Lee's views and have personally found it harder and harder to be involved in any institutional church, although my ELCA parish does make me feel welcome and valued. Each of us needs to find his/her own comfort zone. The main point that I do agree with is the importance of stop hating yourself and the need to avoid subjecting yourself to abusive churches (e.g., why I'm no longer Catholic).

Poisonous Heterosexual Parenting

The professional Christian set - including those whose asses Obama is about to kiss via a meeting at the White House - bloviate ad nausea about two parents - a mother and a father - being required to raise a healthy and happy child. That is, of course, unless the mother and father are extreme religious nut cases who put their religious based lunacy ahead of the life or mental health of their child. The latest example of the heterosexual parenting model so loved by the Christianists comes from Rusk County, Texas, where the parents of a 13 month old child have been indicted for capital murder of their child. It seems that these Christian parents - who strike me as the type who would be sending contributions to CWA or FRC - beat their little girl to death with a hammer to rid her of "demonic possession." Somehow, I cannot help but think that 13 month old Amora Carson would have been ever so much better off with a committed gay or lesbian couple as her parents. Here are some highlights from WFIE-TV 14:

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RUSK COUNTY, TX (KLTV) - A Rusk County grand jury handed up the capital murder indictments against Blaine Keith Milam, 19 and Jessica Bain Carson, 18. The couple is accused of trying to rid 13-month-old Amora Carson of demonic possession by beating her to death with a hammer.

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At the time of the arrest, Rusk County detectives told KLTV it was the worst crime scene they had ever seen. KLTV later learned Milam is a registered sex offender and was supposed to be behind bars. The couple remains behind bars on $2 million bonds.

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Of course there are forms of child abuse that do not involve physical abuse. In fact, the first post I ever posted on this blog back in the fall of 2006 looked at a form of child abuse that happens virtually daily in "Christian" homes around the country and which is promoted by the two organizations that Obama has invited to the White House as per an earlier post this evening. Here is a portion of that posting, a part of which came from a blog called "Proceed at Your Own Risk":

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AMERICA'S ULTIMATE HATE CRIME

Every so once in a while I allow myself to consider the nightmare existence of a queer child growing up with religious fundamentalist parents. The thought of it is so painful that I need to keep it mostly compartmentalized and in the back of my mental and emotional closet.

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It's an aspect of the world of homophobia and fundamentalist religion that we very much ignore. For many reasons, it's the forgotten stepchild of gay activism, child care services and the mental health profession. But the obvious fact is that there are thousands of these kids living in a hell on earth as they fight their way through childhood.

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I can think of few other situations that have the potential to engender such a relentless and pervasive environment of psychological and possibly even physical child abuse. Generally speaking we do not do a good job of handling child abuse in this nation but when it come to gay kids the picture is even bleaker. The ratio of gay kids to straight kids among runaways, child prostitutes and suicides, well documented by the CDC, makes this painfully clear.

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Long before a child develops self-awareness of his or her own sexual orientation, he is trained to believe that homosexuality is an abomination and a perversion that is a threat to the American way of life.In a fundamentalist religious environment, he is told that homosexuality threatens the American family and the sacred institution of marriage. He is told that homosexual activists and their agenda are leading the charge in a war against Christianity. The homosexuals are the enemy.

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This young and impressionable child learns that the Bible, the absolute word of god and truth, clearly states that homosexuals are an abomination and that their sin is punishable by death.And then, worst of all, he learns that homosexuality is a choice made by sick and evil people and that to make this choice is a very bad and wicked thing. But then nature takes its course and at some point the gay child realizes that he's "chosen" homosexuality. He doesn't remember being asked. He doesn't remember checking off that particular choice on any application. And he searches through the mail for the recruitment brochure, but it isn't to be found.Somehow, somewhere along the way, he has made this monumental, life-changing and life-shattering choice, against his will and against the will of god.

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No problem, he thinks, he'll just chose otherwise until he one day realizes that he can't. Try as he might, the gay just won't go away, along with the color of his skin and the texture of his hair.His intellectual and emotional energies become singularly focused on changing that choice but to no avail. He turns up the engines and works hard to hide his nature. Self-hatred begins to rip open his guts. Childhood innocence and joy are not part of his experience. He lives in a state of constant dread and anxiety, fearing exposure or worse.

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It's an exhausting and soul-crushing childhood. While other children are looking to the future with hope, he lives in a world of despair, pain and fear. While other children are considering ballerina, doctor, astronaut or fire fighter, the gay child's energies are focused on hiding his or her true self. The boy dreads his first fake sexual encounter: will he be able to perform? The girl worries less, she will just turn away and cry and wait until it's over.

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Many ex-gays believe that the origins of homosexuality are to be found in an abusive childhood. Their logic is flawed but their childhoods were likely abusive. Many of them come out of strict Christian homes. Growing up gay in a strict fundamentalist Christian home most likely oftentimes means a battering patten of abuse, certainly verbal and sometimes physical. Many of these parents likely steam roll over the self-esteem and self-confidence of these children as they struggle to make "her" more feminine and "him" less of sissy.

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Protected by a very misguided notion of religious freedom, fundamentalists of all sorts are allowed by our society to engage in the ultimate hate crime, a pervasive and monstrous form of child abuse that will one day be seen by social historians and anthropologists as a very barbaric and grotesque aspect of the American civilization. Sexual orientation is not a choice, but our society's willingness to tolerate this terrible treatment of children is a choice and a choice that should make us all ashamed. We will be judged harshly by future generations as we are already judged by more evolved societies on the other side of the Atlantic.

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When slavery, the oppression of women and child labor were recognized for what they were, modern nations changed. When certain Biblical practices including the stoning to death of adulterers were recognized for what they were, modern nations changed.And when the abuse of homosexual children was recognized for what it was, modern nations changed--tragically we were not among them. Freedom of religion was designed to protect people from oppression and persecution. Instead, in 21st Century America, "freedom of religion" is used to do great harm to millions of Americans, including many of our children who are unable to defend themselves, their psyches and their hearts."

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Freedom of religion" should not, in my opinion, be used to excuse behavior that violates sound practices and standards that are based on science, morality and ethics. Further, "freedom of religion" should not exempt people from laws governing discriminatory practices, mental health care, child care and child protection.If we allow religious beliefs to justify human degradation and oppression, we reduce our constitution to nothing but an old piece of paper.

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Homosexuality is common throughout hundreds of animal species and every scientific measure that has been used thus far has confirmed over and over again that this is about nature and not nurture. Of course, people who act exclusively on faith and belief rather than on fact and reason will never be convinced of this. The facts are that dinosaurs and unicorns did not miss the Ark and gay children did not chose to be who they were born to be. But the question that seems to plague us at every turn these days is whether we are to be a nation of fact and reason or a nation of people packed and ready to jump on the Rapture bus? In the meantime, suffer the little children.