Pride and Understanding LGBT History

It's Pride weekend here in Hampton Roads, Virginia and wonderful events are planned that will go on despite the horror that occurred last weekend in Orlando,  Yes, the police presence will be significantly increased and local offices of federal offices will likely be involved.  Yet again, among the information/recruiting booths on Saturday's main event will be the CIA.  Times have truly changed in some ways, but in others, much needs to be done.  Today, the June issue of VEER Magazine hits the streets and includes my column on "Pride and Understanding LGBT History."  I hope you will check it out.  Here are brief excerpts:  

June is Pride month and once again Hampton Roads Pride Fest will take place in downtown Norfolk’s Town Point Park.  This year’s event is on June 18.  The event now rivals the largest festivals in Norfolk and some have said that only Harbor Fest is larger.  When I first came out in mid-life, few could have envisioned how mainstream, if you will, the LGBT community has become.  Back then, same sex relationships could get you a felony conviction under Virginia’s sodomy statute.  My first Pride event was in 2003 and the venue was a hidden back portion of Lakewood Park.  Perhaps a few hundred were in attendance.  Fast forward to 2016, and the crowd this year could approach 20,000 people.  Pride is a time to be proud about one’s self, but also about LGBT individuals across the globe and throughout time.

This sea change in acceptance and visibility did not happen overnight and much work still remains to be done in Virginia and across America, not to mention across the globe.   Yes, through Supreme Court decisions and hard fought legislative victories, the sodomy laws used to persecute gays in Virginia are no more, Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is now on the trash heap of history and same sex marriage is legal across the nation.  But, employment non-discrimination protections, housing non-discrimination and other protections remain non-existent under Virginia law and in roughly 28 other states.  Organizations such as Hampton Roads Business Outreach (“HRBOR”), the local gay and gay friendly chamber of commerce, HR Pride, and Equality Virginia continue to strive for full LGBT equality in the business community and under Virginia’s civil laws.

Indeed, members of the LGBT community are everywhere, in every culture and throughout history.  Peruse a page and Wikipedia on “LGBT history” and one quickly sees that be it ancient Egypt, ancient Greece, ancient Rome, pre-Columbian America, Persia, Japan, China and even India, same sex relations were tolerated, if not always fully accepted.  Just a few notable LGBT individuals from history as compiled by The Bilerico Project  . . .

A wonderful source to learn more of this hidden history is a book entitled “The Origins and Role of Same-Sex Relations in Human Societies,” the end product of over ten years of historical research.  My husband and I received a copy as a gift from is two friends – both historians – who gave a dinner party us as a “wedding gift.”  As noted above, the book concludes that acceptance of homosexuality and bisexuality on the part of much of society historically have been the norm – just as it is in many other parts of the animal kingdom – and that it was the rise of the Roman Catholic Church that lead to homophobia as we know it today. 

So how did this happen?  In a nutshell, the Catholic Church’s bizarre abhorrence of all things sexual that developed in the Middle Ages that was spearheaded by so-called Church fathers who were obsessed with all things sexual, and who were, in my view, mentally disturbed to say the least. 

Thankfully, this religious based tide of animus and ignorance is subsiding, but horrors continue to be inflicted on LGBT individuals by both “godly Christians” and Islamic fundamentalists.  Meanwhile, those of us fortunate enough to live in America and Hampton Roads have much to be proud about and can look at our history with pride.  If you have never attended, consider coming to Pride Fest.

Virginia's Misguided War on Marijuana

In my November, 2015, column in VEER Magazine I noted that changes in Virginia's marijuana laws over the next two years were unlikely and looked at the way in which archaic marijuana laws were causing Virginia's prisons to burst at their seams:

What does all of this portent for Virginia with respect to reform of the marijuana laws?  Most likely nothing will occur during the next two years given the Republican Party control of the House of Delegates.  Sadly, most members of the Virginia GOP must swear fealty to The Family Foundation which not only opposes changes to the marijuana laws but would ban all gambling, including the Virginia Lottery, and ban alcohol sales.  What is unfortunate is that doing nothing means another 40,000+ Virginians will have arrest records for marijuana offenses, with blacks being disproportionately impacted. 

In 2012, the year for which the most recent data is available, there were 23,423 marijuana related arrests in Virginia, 20,914 for possession and 2,509 for selling marijuana.  Under § 18.2-250.1, Code of Virginia, possession of marijuana is punishable by up to 30 days in jail and a fine up to $500 for the first offense and up to one year in jail and a fine up to $2,500 for subsequent offenses.  Under § 18.2-248.1, the delivery or sale of one-half ounce of marijuana or less is punishable by up to one year in jail and a fine up to $2,500. For greater than one-half ounce, the penalties increase to a possible 1 - 10 years in prison and a fine up to $2,500.  Is there any wonder why our jails and prisons are overflowing?  Wake up!

From what I have observed, the police seem to disproportionately target blacks, especially young black males, the majority of whom cannot afford legal counsel.  White defendants who appear with legal counsel typically get off with suspended sentences which are dismissed after a year of good conduct.  Black males without counsel typically get convicted and thereafter have permanent criminal records which are impediments to many employment opportunities.  Meanwhile, conservatives and Republicans whine about the poor - read blacks - not being gainfully employed, yet Virginia's outdated marijuana laws help to insure these types of criminal convictions will bar gainful employment.

Return to Brantingham Lake - 42 Years Later

Lake after sunset

This weekend is turning out to be a wonderful and also emotional weekend.  I am back at the family summer "camp" on Brantingham Lake in the Adirondack Mountains of northern New York State for the first time in 42 years.  It is my husband's first visit.  It's a long story as to why I haven't been back, but better late then never sums up the situation.  My maternal grandparents purchased the camp in 1938 but the family connection goes back far longer.  There are photos of my great grand parents here at the lake in 1896 and subsequent years.  Among the many photos are those of my late mother during her last visit to Brantingham in the summer of 2010.   So, so many memories.  Above is a photo of the lake just after sunset last night and below is a photo of the house and views of the lake early this morning.  

In my June 2015 VEER Magazine I wrote in part about growing up gay and here's the portion that looked at the role this place played in my life:

If the school year was a nightmare, summers were what likely saved me and helped me survive my teen years.  Through my mother's  family, we had a summer home on Brantingham Lake in the western Adirondack Mountains in northern New York State.  As my siblings and I got older, we spent large parts of the summer at the "camp" as such summer homes are called in local parlance.  And this allowed me an opportunity to reinvent myself, if you will.  While I truly sucked at school team sports, I excelled at slalom water skiing, sailing, canoeing and swimming.  I could compete and hold my own.  In addition, at camp, we had a whole different circle of friends, most of whom were from other parts of New York or surrounding states and were far more sophisticated than my school year friends.   Yes, I still struggled to "pray away the gay" and convince myself that I wasn't really attracted to some of my male friends.  And , yes, the mental gymnastics to deny the truth about my sexual orientation continued at Olympic proportions.  But these summers allowed me to finally feel somewhat good about myself.   As one friend from those years with whom I have reconnected through the magic of Facebook wrote in a post "the memories of the lake, the times in the boats at night, skiing in the mornings at 6am so as to be the only boat on the lake..... these are the memories that never leave me and are the ones I use to help me get to sleep at night."  They were the summer time experiences that helped me survive growing up gay.

There have been changes in the place over the years - most notably the loss of a number of huge pine trees felled in a severe "mircobust thunder storm some years back that wreaked havoc on the area - but other aspects have not changed at all.  

Camp in the fading sunset

Early morning view - mist over the lake

Early morning - mist over the water

McAuliffe Widens Lead Over Cuccinelli Ahead of Debate

UPDATED: In follow up to the first version of this post, a new Washington Post/Abt-SRBI poll puts Terry McAuliffe's lead over Ken Cuccinelli even larger that reported in the NBC4/NBC News/Marist poll.  Here are highlights from the Richmond Times Dispatch:

Democrat Terry McAuliffe has vaulted into the lead over Republican Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli in a Virginia governor’s race that has left many voters sour on both candidates, according to a new Washington Post/Abt-SRBI poll.

McAuliffe leads 47 percent to 39 percent among likely voters, with Libertarian Robert Sarvis’ 10 percent suggesting an unrest among voters not satisfied with either major-party contender.

The shift in the race has come almost exclusively from women voters, who prefer McAuliffe by a 24-point margin over Cuccinelli. The candidates were effectively tied among women in Washington Post poll in May.

McAuliffe’s strength among women is likely due in part to an intense campaign to portray Cuccinelli as a threat to women and the issues they might care about most deeply. A new McAuliffe ad, for instance, features a Norfolk OB-GYN speaking directly to the camera about how she is “offended” by Cuccinelli’s position on abortion rights.

The challenge for Cuccinelli is stark: Nearly half of all voters view him unfavorably, and they trust his opponent as much as or more than him on every major issue, according to the poll.

While the poll trends are encouraging, Cuccinelli not only needs to be defeated, but defeated in a landslide.  All efforts to motivate and turn out likely Democrat voters need to remain in high gear.

Like most Virginians, I am exhausted from this year's mud slinging gubernatorial race pitting the GOP's closeted and insane Ken Cuccinelli against Democrat Terry McAuliffe.  As my latest column in the September issue of VEER Magazine stated, McAuliffe may not be my dream candidate, but compared to sodomy law and personhood bill supporting Ken Cuccinelli, McAuliffe is the better choice for numerous reasons.  Apparently, other Virginians are beginning to draw a similar conclusion.  A new NBC4/NBC News/Marist poll shows McAuliffe with a five point lead over Cuccinelli.  Ten percent of voters polled are "undecided," so it is critical that efforts not let up in turning out voters to vote for a straight Democrat ticket on November 5, 2013.  Here are highlights from NBC Channel 4 in Washington on the poll findings:

Fueled by support with women and better likability ratings, Democrat Terry McAuliffe leads Republican Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli 43-38 percent, with Libertarian candidate Robert Sarvis at 8 percent among likely voters in the Virginia governor's race, a new NBC4/NBC News/Marist poll out Monday finds.

The poll of 546 likely voters and 1,069 registered voters, conducted from Sept. 17 to 19, comes two days before a debate between McAuliffe and Cuccinelli sponsored by NBC4 Washington and the Fairfax County Chamber of Commerce and moderated by NBC News Chief White House Correspondent and Political Director Chuck Todd.

After a summer of mudslinging and negative campaign ads, neither candidate is well liked, but Cuccinelli has taken a bigger hit. Just 34 percent of registered voters view Cuccinelli favorably, while 47 percent say they have an unfavorable impression of him. Back in May, it was the reverse – 42 favorable, 27 percent unfavorable.

McAuliffe, on the other hand, is on the positive side – 41 favorable, 34 percent negative – though those unfavorable numbers are up 10 points as more people have gotten to know the former Democratic National Committee chairman under Bill Clinton and party fundraiser.

Sarvis may be something of an outlet for disaffected Republican voters who are calling themselves independents. With the national GOP brand suffering, there has been a trend nationally and in Virginia that more Republicans are identifying as independents. Mitt Romney, the Republican nominee for president in 2012, after all, won independents, but lost the election.

Between now and election day, I hope more voters learn about Cuccinelli's improper assistance to energy companies against Virginia landowners, his support for a personhood amendment that would criminalize all abortions and many forms of contraception, his desire to change divorce laws to favor fathers against women, and his extremism on other social issues, including employment protections for gay employees.

VEER Magazine Cruise

This evening the boyfriend and I joined other writers, advertisers and supporters of VEER Magazine on a cruise on a sunset cruise on the three masted schooner the American Rover (see photo above via the b/f's phone - I look like hell).  I have been writing a monthly LGBT/political column in VEER for over 2 and a half years that seeks to educate local readers about LGBT issues and the real political positions of those running for elected office.  My September, 2013, makes the case for why voters need to get out and vote for Terry McAuliffe for Governor on election day.  The October column will look at the Lt. Governor and Attorney General races and why voters need to be sure to get out and vote for Ralph Northam and Mark Herring.

One of the fun aspects of this evening was meeting a wonderful British couple - the husband is a British naval officer attached to NATO - and their recently college graduate daughter who is doing a volunteer internship with VEER before working on the 2014 Olympic Games in Russia. I suspect we will have them over as dinner guests to our home sometime soon.  The last of the sunset is below.