Why Ralph Northam Should Not Resign

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This will be the last post on this topic hopefully for a while.  A great column in the New York Times lays out why the Democrats' insane, "no forgiveness ever" policy needs to be put on the trash heap.  Yes, the subject of the column is Ralph Northam, who the husband and I truly count as a personal friend - not just someone I name drop as some have alleged in nasty comments on Facebook - but the overall premise is, to me, 100% on point and needs to be heeded by both Democrats and Republicans if we are not to find ourselves in a dark place where one's entire life is ruined by foolish mistakes in the past.  And let's be honest as the column reminds us, most of us are guilty of some act or statement that under the Democrats' insane standard would damn us for life.  We've merely been lucky and not publicly exposed since we are not in the public eye.  It also reminds us that he/she who is totally without any sin is the only one fit to cast the first stone.  (Sadly, these concepts were lost on Equality Virginia which joined the rush to judgment and has perhaps permanently lost my support as a result, if I apply the no forgiveness ever standard EV embraced)  Here are column excerpts:

It’s probably for the best that Ralph Northam seems determined not to resign as governor of Virginia. He may have done something ugly and dumb many years ago, when he was a young man and prevailing notions of socially permissible behavior were uglier and dumber than they are today.

In the 35 years between those two points he has, by all appearances, lived an upstanding life without a hint of racial bias. If we are going to embrace a politics where that’s not enough to save a sitting governor accused of no crime, we’re headed toward a dark place.

I write this as someone who isn’t a Democrat and doesn’t share many of Northam’s views. Nor do I think he covered himself in glory when he accused his Republican opponent, Ed Gillespie, of “racist rhetoric” during the 2017 gubernatorial race, while an advocacy group allied to his campaign ran an ad that made out Gillespie supporters to be homicidal bigots intent on harming minority kids. What goes around comes around, and the temptation for schadenfreude is great.

Then again, each of us might want to perform an internal audit before we join the cast-the-first-stone coalition.

Ever told — or laughed at — a bigoted joke? I have, and I cringe today at what I once found funny. Ever used one of the more common ethnic or sexist slurs — “gypped,” for instance, or “bitch” — or dropped the f-word as it commonly refers to gay people? I’ve been guilty of this too, to my shame. Have ugly generalizations or snap judgments based on ethnic stereotypes perambulated through your mind, even if they didn’t fall out of your mouth? Guilty again.

I admit to all of this not as a form of moral — or immoral — exhibitionism, but because I think it’s true of the overwhelming majority of people irrespective of their race or gender. (If you don’t agree, audit yourself twice.) Few of us are proud of these lapses. Many of us are trying to be considerably more mindful about them. But most of us don’t rip ourselves to pieces over them, either.

That’s because we believe that our worst moments and dumbest utterances shouldn’t define us. That our youthful behavior is more of a reflection of what is around us than a representation of what’s inside. That we deserve to be judged by the decency of our intentions and the totality of our deeds. That we are entitled to a presumption of innocence, a measure of forgiveness, a sense for our times, and multiple opportunities for redemption.

Should Jesse Jackson’s entire life come down to the anti-Semitic words “Hymietown,” uttered by him in 1984 (and comically immortalized by Eddie Murphy)? Should Prince Harry forever be remembered as the royal who dressed as a Nazi? What about Joy Reid’s virulently homophobic blog posts, or Joe Biden’s racially condescending description of Barack Obama as “the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean”?

As I said, this is taking us to a dark place. It is hard enough for ordinary, decent people, aware of their shortcomings and capable of shame, to contemplate a career in politics; why would they ever do so if the statute of limitations on past indiscretions never expires? And if they won’t run, aren’t they just ceding the field to those with no shame?

Ralph Northam needs to clear up just who’s in that photo, so Virginians won’t think he’s lying. And he has an opportunity to speak powerfully about the legacy of a casual racism that tainted his generation of Virginians, and about the need for repentance and redemption. The best way for him to do so is as governor.

Support Ralph Northam for Governor

One of the burdens of living in Virginia is the fact that we have elections every year - federal elections in even numbered years and state elections in odd numbered years.  It is easy to get burned out.  However, given the threat - at least in our view - that Donald Trump and a Republican congressional majority pose to LGBT rights and civil liberties in general, it is all the more important that we elect Ralph Northam as Virginia's next governor.  We need a firewall against some of the worse extreme policies that may be forth coming, especially given some of Trump's anti-LGBT appointees to date.  The husband (Barry D. Menser) and I know Ralph and his wife personally and we believe it is absolutely critical that we do all we can to support his election effort.  Hence, we are on the host committee for a fundraiser on December 8, 2016.  We encourage you to join us at the event (if you cannot attend, we will be hosting an event in our home at a later date).  The details are below:

Please join

Lieutenant Governor Ralph Northam  

and 

Jimmy R. Chisman | Jerri & Frank Dickseski | Duncan & Diana Garnett  

Barry Menser & Mike Hamar | Jay & Tara Joseph | Mamie Locke

Monty Mason | Jim McNider | Ross & Martha Mugler

Leonard A. Bennett & Dr. Drina A. Northam

BJ Roberts | Molly & Forrest Ward

At the 

Northam For Governor Hampton Kick-Off

Thursday, December 8, 2016 – 6:00pm to 8:00pm 

At the home of Molly and Forrest Ward
801 Park Place | Hampton, VA 23669

Host - $5,000+ | Co-Host - $2,500 

Sponsor - $1,000  | Benefactor - $500 

Supporter - $250 | Guest - $100

To RSVP, please click here or email david@ralphnortham.com.

You may also call 804-397-9877 

Click to RSVP online >>

Tim Kaine Pays Respects at Pulse Memorial

As noted in prior posts, both the husband and I have met Tim Kaine, Hillary Clinton's vice presidential running mate, a man who in our estimation would make a wonderful vice president and, should something happen to Hillary Clinton, a sound and responsible president.  While a Roman Catholic, Kaine has evolved on LGBT issues and now, like many other Democrats, fully supports federal non-discrimination protections for LGBT Americans, and fully marriage equality.  Consistent with this recognition of LGBT individuals as entitled to all the rights of full citizens and as fully human - a stark contrast from the views of Mike Pence, Donald trump's VP pick - Tim Kaine paid a visit to the memorial for the Pulse massacre victims.  Here are video highlights from NBC News:

ORLANDO - While the political world was wrapped up in the commotion around Monday night's debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, Clinton's running mate Tim Kaine was in a wildly different setting very far away, marking and mourning one of the nation's worst tragedies up close.

The Virginia senator was in Orlando for campaign events, and decided to make a quiet, unannounced stop at the site of the Pulse Nightclub shooting, a visit that aides say he felt very strongly about. Kaine visited the site along with Florida Sen. Bill Nelson, former Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, her husband Captain Mark Kelly, and Orlando Police Chief John Mina. They viewed the rainbow-colored wall, read letters and messages from people who lost their loved ones, and left flowers at the memorial.

The stop was a reflective moment for Kaine and a reminder of what his state endured nine years ago while he was serving as Virginia's governor. After surveying the site of the nightclub, the senator approached the small group of reporters gathered at the side of the site with tears in his eyes.

Giffords and Kelly also appeared with Kaine at a debate watch party in Orlando Monday night hosted by the Human Rights Campaign. The couple is starting a six-week long national bus tour to draw attention to gun violence prevention measures.

For LGBT voters, the choice ought to be easy: LGBT friendly Clinton and Kaine or Trump who has pandered to homophobic Christofascists and Mike Pence who is a Christofascist himself.

How Gay-Friendly Are the Presidential Candidates?

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Join Us at the Commonwealth Dinner

Each each year with few exceptions, the husband and I attend The Commonwealth Dinner in Richmond.  The event is the largest fundraising event for Equality Virginia ("EV") which continues to push for full LBGT equality in Virgina and also works to oppose the ugliest legislation proposed by Republican extremists and religious extremists who want to keep LGBT Virginians forever inferior under the law. The event is a lot of fun and is an opportunity to meet many politicians and supporters of equality from across the state.

This year's Commonwealth Dinner is April 16, 2016, and we wanted to let you know some of the details.  First, the keynote speaker will be actor and comedian Carol Leifer.  In addition, EV has also announced the OUTstanding Virginians for 2016 who will be honored at the Dinner.  Locally, our friend Charles Ford – a history professor at Norfolk State University who has done considerable research on local LGBT history and recently published a book on the subject - is among this year's honorees.

Registration is open now and early bird rates end February 28.  I hope you will join us to show your support for EV and your support for LGBT equality.  As one friend noted, "if you’ve never attended the Dinner it is truly a celebratory affair, and it’s encouraging to be in a space with so many people who care about these issues."

To purchase your ticket for the Dinner, click here and when you do be sure to choose us as your table host!  We hope to see readers at the event.  The husband will be sporting a new over the top tuxedo jacket purchased on our most recent trip to Ft. Lauderdale. :)

Mark Herring to Run for Re-election as Atorney General

Today Virginia Attorney General Mark Herring announced that he will seek re-election as Attorney General in 2017 rather than run for Governor.  Herring has been an amazing ally of the LGBT community since his election in 2013, including but not limited to his role in refusing to defend Virginia's unconstitutional gay marriage ban.  For the husband and I, Herring's announcement is welcome news for an added reason: now there will be no contest for the gubernatorial nomination between Herring and Lt. Governor Ralph Northam whom we count as a personal friend.  We have supported both men in the past and hosted a fundraiser in our home for Herring in 201 (see the image above)  and have already contributed to Northam's 2017 bid for Governor (we have offered to host an event for Northam in our home as well).  The Richmond Times-Dispatch has more on Mark Herring's announcement.  Here are highlights:

Attorney General Mark R. Herring announced Wednesday that he is running for re-election in 2017, avoiding a divisive fight with Lt. Gov. Ralph S. Northam for the Democratic nomination for governor.

“Our future progress as a commonwealth requires an attorney general who is fiercely and fearlessly committed to promoting justice, equality and opportunity for all Virginians,” Herring told reporters at a news conference on Capitol Square.

Northam said in a statement that Herring, whom he calls “a good friend,” has his full support.

“In just 20 months, Mark has changed the course of our history by fighting for marriage equality, Dreamers, the Chesapeake Bay, and a host of other important issues,” Northam said.

Herring is the first attorney general to seek re-election since Democrat Mary Sue Terry. She won re-election in 1989 and then lost the 1993 contest for governor to Republican George Allen.

“This is great news for Virginia Democrats,” said Larry Sabato, director of the Center for Politics at the University of Virginia. “Parties can still win despite a divisive nominating contest, but it is much easier if you have no fight for the top position and an incumbent anchoring the ticket in the AG spot.”

Not surprisingly, the voter disenfranchising, anti-gay, anti-women, anti-Hispanic Virginia GOP had less than kind things to say about Herring:

The Republican Party of Virginia said in a statement that the “new face of crusading liberalism” has decided to run again for attorney general. “Mark Herring has run the Virginia Attorney General’s Office like Barack Obama’s Justice Department. While he promised to get politics out of the office, he has done the exact opposite,” said John Whitbeck, chairman of the state GOP.  “Herring has at times refused to enforce Virginia law and instead advanced a Bernie Sanders-style progressive agenda.”

Whitbeck and those in now in control of the Virginia GOP  want gays back in the closet and invisible, women barefoot and pregnant and submissive to their husbands, and blacks back living under a defacto Jim Crow regime.  As for Hispanics, the Virginia GOP wants them to engage in "self-deportation" to use Mitt Romney's terminology.

Vote to Move Virginia Forward in November

Attorney General Mark Herring, Lt. Governor Ralph Northam, Rep. Bobby Scott, friends Claus and Robert and Suzanne Patrick in yellow.

The following is a reprint of my latest column in VEER Magazine which makes the case for re-electing Mark Warner to the U.S. Senate and electing Suzanne Patrick to replace Scott Rigell in the Virginia 2nd Congressional District:

For non-political junkies (for the record I will admit that I am a political junkie!), living in Virginia can be exhausting given its off year state elections which result in Virginians undergoing political campaign overload literally every year.  But every year’s election cycle does matter and the outcome can have a huge impact on our lives and the society in which we live.  The 2014 mid-term national elections are no exception and, if voters are complacent, the wrong candidates could end up being elected to the detriment of many Virginians.  This year’s important contests are for (i) the United States Senate between incumbent Democrat, Mark Warner, and former lobbyist and GOP candidate Ed Gillespie, and (ii) for the 2nd Congressional District between GOP incumbent, Scott Rigell and Democrat Challenger, Suzanne Patrick.

I have the distinct advantage of knowing three out of the four candidates involved.  From my perspective, the November election in these two contests is a very clear choice between moving Virginia and the nation forward or a destructive effort to move backwards in time to a mythical time that never existed.  Despite my long Republican past, the two candidates that deserve election and who will move Virginia and America forward are Democrats Mark Warner and Suzanne Patrick for the reasons that I will set forth.

For most Virginians, Mark Warner is a known commodity, having served as a popular governor (he ran against and defeated one of my former law partners) and a very good U.S. Senator for Virginia.  Mark has a track record of putting the nation first and political party second, and has demonstrated that he will strive to work on a bipartisan basis despite the Republican Party obstructionism which has made the current Congress one of the least productive in history.  As I have noted in past columns, America has one of the most expensive and least cost efficient health care systems of any advanced nations where those with insurance coverage pay exorbitant bills to pay for the treatments written off by non-profit hospitals.  Recognizing this reality, Mark Warner has supported the Affordable Health Care Act which, although not perfect, over time will decrease the rise in health care costs and expand the number of Americans who have health care insurance.  He also supports legislation that will aid increasing jobs and boosting the economy. He also understands that our broken immigration system needs reform.  On social and civil rights issues, Mark supports equal rights for LGBT individuals, supports immigration reform and minority rights and respects a woman’s right to make her own health care decisions with the counsel of her physical and family.

Mark Warner’s opponent, Ed Gillespie, in contrast is supportive of all of the failed Republican policies of the last 35+ years.  Gillespie talks in generalities about jobs, the economy, and energy resources, but offers few specifics beyond the typical GOP approach of slashing taxes for the wealthy, slashing social programs (using subtle race baiting code words, of course, in his ads to suggest that some undeserving individuals are free loading off others), seeking to repeal safety and environmental regulations, and over all leaving the middle class to slowly regress further economically.  With upward social mobility now higher lower in America than “Old Europe” as the Republicans derisively call it, Gillespie offers nothing except the canard that cutting takes and cutting regulations will create jobs to reverse this downward spiral.  On health care, Gillespie would repeal the Affordable Health Care Act and return us to the totally broken health care system that predated it where insurance companies control the market place.  Worse yet, on social issues, Gillespie would keep LGBT Americans second class – if not 3rd class – citizens and would have women’s health care decisions made by aging white men and/or religious extremists such as those at The Family Foundation who believe women should be subordinate to men and basically bare foot and pregnant in the home. In short, Gillespie seems to yearn for a recreation of a misogynist version of the 1950s when gays, blacks, Hispanics, and women “knew their place.” Oh, and did I mention that Gillespie was a lobbyist for Enron?

Given the contrasts between Mark Warner and Ed Gillespie, anyone who wants to see Virginia and America move forward in the coming years needs to vote for Mark Warner.

A similar contrast is presented to voters in the 2nd congressional district between Scott Rigell and Suzanne Patrick.   Like Gillespie, Rigell’s main mantra to improve the economy is to (i) cut taxes for the affluent, (ii) repeal the Affordable Health Care Act and leave millions of Americans without health care coverage, and (iii) allow offshore oil drilling off Virginia’s coast.  As a former in-house counsel for a Fortune 50 oil company’s oil and gas subsidiary, I suspect I know far more about oil exploration than Mr. Rigell.  First, should such drilling be permitted, most of the jobs created would go to oil industry companies based outside of Virginia that would bring in personnel from outside Virginia.  If jobs were created as Rigell boasts, few would be Virginia jobs.  As for offshore oil production being a quick fix for America’s foreign oil dependency, even if oil were to be found in economically feasible quantities off Virginia’s coast, bringing such production online would take a decade or more at the earliest and provide little relief.

On social issues and women’s rights, Rigell, like Gillespie is more than willing to prostitute himself to religious extremists at The Family Foundation. On gay rights, Rigell has followed the dictates of the Christian Right and, although invisible on his current campaign website, Rigell has been endorsed in the past by the founder of a leading anti-gay hate group. Rigell also was a leader of a far right group that broke away from Galilee Episcopal Church in Virginia Beach following the ordination of Gene Robinson as bishop of New Hampshire. True to form, Rigell also opposes a woman’s right to access family planning services and would restrict access to contraception.

Opposing Rigell is Suzanne Patrick, a retired Navy Commander, who like myself has held government appointments from Republican office holders. Suzanne is a fourth generation military officer who has had overseas postings in Beijing, Berlin, Delhi, Seoul and Warsaw.  In 2001, she was appointed by President George W. Bush to be Deputy Under Secretary of Defense for Industrial Policy.  In short, she knows the needs of our military from the inside out unlike Mr. Rigell.  On job creation, Suzanne has ideas that go far beyond tax cuts for the rich and leaving millions of Americans without access to healthcare insurance, including the need to rebuild America’s infrastructure and to position Virginia’s port facilities to remain competitive in the changing international market place.

On social issues, Suzanne Patrick’s positions are 180 degrees from those of Scott Rigell.  She believes in civil law equality for all Americans and Virginians, including LGBT individuals. Unlike Rigell, Suzanne has attended events of the local LGBT chamber of commerce and been willing to listens to the needs of the LGBT business community.  On women’s issues, Suzanne believes that women and their doctors should make health care decisions for women, not aging white men in the House of Representatives.  Suzanne understands that with America’s changing demographics, the 1950’s mindset of Scott Rigell (Rigell’s idea of “outreach” is joining the James River Country Club) will hold both the 2nd District and America back.

This column does not permit the space to go into an in depth analysis to fully compare the four candidates discussed.  Suffice it to say, Ed Gillespie and Scott Rigell hold views that want to repeat the failed GOP policies of the last 30+ years which will in the process hold both Virginia and America back, if not move it backwards in time.  In contrast, Mark Warner and Suzanne Patrick recognize that Virginia, America, and the world are changing.  Therefore, our elected officials need to seek innovative solutions and recognize that the policies of the past no longer work.  If you want to vote to move Virginia forward, get out and vote in November and support Mark Warner and Suzanne Patrick.

Disclosure: Michael Hamar is a former 8 year member of the City Committee of the Republican Party of Virginia Beach and held a four year state appointment under former Governor Jim Gilmore. 

Gaynette LaRue for Hampton City Council

In Virginia, elections seem to be non-stop what with alternating years on state and federal elections and city and county elections thrown in for good measure.  For those politically involved, it is sometimes exhausting and expensive if one puts their money where there mouth is.  Yet political involvement is crucial if we are to see the right people elected to office.  As LGBT voters are seeing at the state level, having Terry McAuliffe holding the governorship and Mark Herring serving as Attorney General makes for a sea change here in Virginia and I shudder to think what things would be like if instead we had Ken Cuccinelli as governor and the equally extreme Mark Obenshain as attorney general.  But politics doesn't stop at the state level.  Local elections are crucial as well.  Hence why the boyfriend - now fiance - are involved in city counsel level elections.  And that is why we will be supporting Gaynette "Gay" LaRue for Hampton City Council.  She is a strong LGBT ally and HRBOR member and, like us, wants to see Hampton move to the next level.  Here are highlights from the Daily Press on her announcement that she is running for office:

Hampton Planning Chairwoman Gaynette LaRue has announced that she will run for City Council this spring.  LaRue said she will focus on schools, job creation and neighborhoods.

LaRue, a Linden Avenue resident, is also leaning on her career as a Wells Fargo financial adviser and an accredited asset management specialist. She says her career – she's worked in the financial field for 25 years – helps her understand budgets and the "complexities of municipal finance."

LaRue is running for one of three full-term City Council seats on the ballot in the May 6 election. A fourth, two-year City Council term and mayor's seat will also be on the ballot.

LaRue was named chairwoman of the Planning Commission in October, a month after being appointed to a second four-year term on the commission. The Planning Commission makes recommendations to the City Council concerning the city's community plan, zoning ordinance and land use requests.

LaRue has said she has a significant interest in downtown redevelopment and thinks the historic courthouse on Kings Way should become a haven for artists after the new downtown courthouse is built. She hopes to see the city make its waterfront more of a destination for visitors.  She is the founding president of the Downtown Hampton Development Partnership.

I hope Hampton readers will join us in backing her candidacy and will turn out to vote on May 6, 2014. 

Sharon McDonald for Norfolk Commissioner of Revenue

Sharon McDonald at the HR Pride Wine Tasting Fundraiser

Tomorrow is primary day and I hope Norfolk voters who read this blog will make a point of going out and voting for Sharon McDonald for Norfolk Commissioner of Revenue.  I am no longer a Norfolk resident myself, but I do own and operate a small business in Norfolk and can attest first hand that Sharon McDonald is one of the few Norfolk elected officials who "gets it" and actively seeks to assist small businesses.  Sadly, for the most part Norfolk City Council does little more than lip service about small businesses.  Sharon backs her statements with actions.

As I noted in my recent column in VEER Magazine, Sharon's competitor seems like a decent guy, but he has no experience and in terms of being an LGBT ally, he's been missing in action.  In my VEER piece I said the following:

In contrast to Poston, her opponent, Sharon McDonald is a veteran campaigner and her support of the LGBT community has been stunning.    McDonald was an Out in the Park sponsor in 2012 and is a sponsor again in 2013.  In addition, last year she was at the flag raising ceremony for the beginning of the Out in the Park festivities and gave a short interview which was posted on the Hampton Roads Pride website.  And her involvement with the LGBT community doesn't stop there.  She has attended many networking events held by Hampton Roads Business OutReach, the local LGBT chamber of commerce, and other LGBT organization events.

It's one thing to say you support small business or that you support the LGBT community.  It is something else to actually follow through on one's words.   Sharon McDonald has made good on her words time and time again.  We need her to carry the Democrat standard this November.  Please vote for her tomorrow.

Virginia Senator Mark Warner Launches Petition To Strike Down DOMA

 While he was Governor of Virginia, Mark Warner - now a U.S. Senator - was perhaps the most LGBT friendly governor in the history of the Commonwealth.   Among other things, he signed an Executive Order barring employment discrimination against LGBT state employees (the Executive Order was continued by Tim Kaine when he became Governor only to die undercurrent GOP Governor Bob "Taliban Bob" McDonnell).    More recently, Warner has endorsed gay marriage and he now continues his pro-gay stance by launching a petition to the U.S. Supreme Court urging the Court to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act ("DOMA") as unconstitutional.   Here's what the new petition website has to say:

SUPPORT MARRIAGE EQUALITY: SIGN THE PETITION

Even though many states now recognize the rights of committed same-sex couples to marry, the federal government continues to discriminate. Same-sex couples are denied all sorts of legal rights – like access to their spouse’s insurance benefits and Social Security survivor benefits – because of an outdated law called DOMA.

That’s just wrong. All married couples should be entitled to the same legal rights – regardless of sexual orientation.

The Supreme Court recently heard oral arguments challenging the Constitutionality of DOMA, and will rule on the issue soon.

Please use the form below to stand with Mark Warner and make your voice heard. Urge the Court to strike down DOMA so that committed same-sex couples get the same legal rights as anyone else.

I hope readers - especially those in Virginia will sign the petition.