The Link Between Bullying, Social Rejection and LGBT Suicide

The sad reality is that suicides among the LGBT community are higher than in the general population.  This is not due to anything inherently wrong with being LGBT or a higher level of mental illness among those who are LGBT.  Instead, the problem stems from how society treats people in sexual minority groups.  Bullying, of course springs to mind, but also involved is family and societal rejection, all typically fanned by the constant anti-LGBT drumbeat of right wing Christian denominations and, now, a White House regime that is arguing that mistreatment of LGBT individuals in the workplace is perfectly legal. Anyone who thinks that LGBT youth aren't watching and listening to this potentially deadly message is deluding them-self. That supposed "Christians" are in the lead in projecting this message of hatred also directly ties to the growing exodus of the younger generations from religion, a trend that I for one view as positive. A recent piece reviews the linkage between unnecessary suicide deaths and bullying and societal abuse.  Here are highlights: 

Chloe was 12 or 13 years old when she began to question her sexual identity. She felt attracted to girls. She knew she was different from most of her classmates. So she didn’t talk about her feelings at school in the United Kingdom. She didn’t share them with her family, either. She knew they would not approve. “It wasn’t something that would be okay,” she said. A feeling of isolation built up inside her, and Chloe felt more and more like she didn’t fit in. Eventually, she tried to kill herself. Data for 2017 show that 17 percent of all high school students — about one in six — seriously considered killing themselves. That figure was nearly one in every two teens (almost 48 percent) for those who are lesbian, gay or bisexual. And 23 percent of these teens made attempts. Nearly one in three teens (32 percent) who were unsure about their sexuality also thought about ending their lives; 14 percent tried.

Scientists have begun to dig into why suicide risks are higher for LGBTQ+ people, especially teens. . . . The problem, researchers say, seems to stem from how society treats members of these minorities. Changing attitudes toward these teens can help more of them live and thrive. There’s no reason why being a sexual minority means a person must face a higher risk for suicide or other mental-health problems, Mueller says. “What does put kids at risk of suicide is when they feel rejected by families or friends or communities and when they feel ashamed of themselves.” Dealing with all of those stresses, she says, “can be really hard.” Those feelings often emerge when society views those who are different through a lens of stigma. “Stigma is about not valuing people who are different,” explains Ian Rivers. It is about “viewing them as less worthy or less important.” Rivers is a psychologist at the University of Strathclyde in Glasgow, Scotland. When society treats people who are in a minority group as if they have less value, those individuals can feel serious stress. In some cases, stigma leads to bullying. “I was isolated from the boys and they started calling me sissy and things like that,” said Sirus, a study participant. The teasing turned into violence. And, he added, “the teachers did not pick it up.” So they did nothing about it.

In 2015, Mueller and her colleagues found a link between bullying and suicides of lesbian, gay and bisexual youths. As bullying increased, so did the rates for young people’s thoughts of ending their lives, the researchers reported in the American Journal of Public Health. But bullying didn’t fully explain why the rates for LGB youth were so much higher than for other young people. . . . “It’s about a lot of other factors — like rejection from peers or families or shame.”

Young people also can internalize other people’s bad attitudes. In other words, they come to believe what others say. So even though it’s not true, they might come to believe that they’re “not good” simply because they are experiencing a same-sex attraction, Mueller says. To make things harder, society typically assumes “that everyone is heterosexual.” That, she says, “automatically puts everyone who isn’t at a disadvantage.” Burdens created by a hostile social environment “fall hardest on the youngest people” in LGBTQ+ groups, says Geoffrey Ream. He’s a professor of social work at Adelphi University in Garden City, N.Y. Ream recently dug into data from the U.S. National Violent Death Reporting System. . . . LGBT youth were 24 percent of the 49 victims ages 12 to 14. LGBT teens also made up 16 percent of the 15- to 17-year olds. Younger people “don’t have the same level of psychological resources” to cope with challenges that older people do, Ream explains. So children and teens are less ready to deal with the abuse that society may heap on them if they are part of a sexual minority. Youths also have fewer options to get out of the house and find resources to help. Family rejection is a big concern, agrees David Huebner. He’s a psychologist at George Washington University in Washington, D.C. He and others have found that parents’ rejection ups the risk of health problems, including suicide, among young adult LGB people. Name calling, physical violence and being kicked out of home are obvious examples of rejection. But rejection can also be more subtle. For example, parents might criticize a young person’s dress or behavior for not conforming to gender stereotypes.

LGBT Suicides: Aiyisha Hassan, Age 20

I had not previously seen this story about a 20 year old lesbian (pictured at right) who took her own life earlier in the month. There is no evidence that bullying was a factor, but one cannot help but wonder whether or not all of the propaganda put out by the anti-gay forces played some role. Personally, I believe every member of the LGBT community suffers to one extent or another as a result of the prevailing homophobia in society. The Christianists can disclaim responsibility all they want, but they are the moving force behind the ongoing denigration of LGBT individuals and the principal supporters of anti-gay legislation. One would have to be unconscious not to feel the societal effects of the non-stop attacks coming from NOM, FRC, FOTF, and other organizations that use anti-gay propaganda as one of the largest fund raising tools. Here are highlights from SF Weekly:
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The rash of young gays and lesbians committing suicide has now struck the country's LGBT capital here in the Bay Area: Aiyisha Hassan, a 20-year-old Marin County native who identified as lesbian, killed herself on October 4. Hassan was a former student at Howard University in Washington, D.C.
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According to news reports, Hassan was a part of the university's LGBT student group:
Lauren Morris, 21, a senior at Howard, who lived in the same building as Hassan from 2008-2009, said she introduced Hassan to [the LGBT student group] and added that friends have reported Hassan's suicide was related to her struggles with her sexuality." ''She was having a lot of trouble with a lot of different things,'' Morris says, ''but mainly her sexual identity and just trying to express that.''
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The Rev. Hassan told the Metro Weekly in Washington, D.C. that his daughter, who identified as lesbian, was not the victim of anti-gay bullying.

Homophobia is Killing Our Kids

The Fort Wayne Frost Illustrated, a weekly paper aimed at the black community, is carrying a timely opinion piece that looks at homophobia in the black community and the dire consequences it has on black LGBT youth. The problem, of course, is not unique to the Fort Wayne area. In the Hampton Roads area, some of the most vocally homophobic churches are black churches which are frequently cynically manipulated by the former segregationists within lily white "family values" organizations to attack any effort for gay-supportive legislation. Even though these family values groups in the final analysis are not only anti-gay but also anti-black and anti-immigrant as well. Meanwhile, there is a HIV/AIDS epidemic in the local black community which these same black churches often pretend does not exist. Here are some highlights from the opinion piece entitled "Homophobia is Killing Our Kids":

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Last week I watched in horror as ministers, church officials, and parishioners of a black Connecticut church, Manifested Glory Ministries, invoked the name of Jesus to release the "gay demons" supposedly possessing the soul of a 16-year-old boy. What I was watching was not a horror movie but a YouTube video clip that had been sent to me by a friend. The clip opens with the young man lying on the floor as a woman stands over him shouting, "Get on up out of here you homosexual demon! I command you by the blood of Jesus! You are a spirit that is not of God!"

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While those outside of fundamentalist religious traditions are shocked when they see or hear about such things, scenes like this are not uncommon to those of us who were raised inside of that tradition. We grew up seeing well meaning men and women of God performing rituals like this on people who church officials and parishioners believed were possessed by demons and evil spirits. So I am not surprised to know that this practice still goes on. I am, however, deeply saddened and outraged to know that the bigotry and ignorance that acts like this expose still hold such powerful sway over those who should know better. Perhaps most frightening is that these are good people who thought they were doing the right thing and were utterly sincere in their belief that this bizarre ceremony could actually turn a young gay man into a straight one.

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The incident at Manifested Glory Ministries is only one of hundreds of similarly destructive incidents that happen every single day in churches, homes, and schools all across the country. GLBT youth are in crisis; not because they are homosexual but because far too many people foster a mindset of homophobia and fear. Even the perception of being gay is enough to cause young people to be terrorized and harassed. . . . In February of this year, three middle school students in Illinois all killed themselves in response to prolonged anti-gay harassment and bullying. Just this past April, only days before his 12th birthday, a young black boy, Carl Joseph Walker- Hoover, hanged himself because he could no longer endure the taunts, bullying, and anti-gay slurs hurled at him on a daily basis by his peers. And just 10 days after Walker- Hoover's death, another young boy of color, Jaheem Herrera, also hanged himself because of an unrelenting barrage of threats, bullying, and anti-gay slurs.

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We in the black community have a long tradition of treating others with generosity, kindness, love, and compassion. Surely we can find better ways to deal with issues of sexuality than attempting to "exorcise" someone of his or her identity. Homophobia is killing our youth, and the high level of religious conservatism, ignorance, and misunderstanding surrounding gender and sexual identity issues in communities of color puts our youth at even greater risk for death. In many cases, the deaths of GLBT teens have been literal, but more often than not GLBT youth suffer an emotional, psychological, and spiritual death.

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As an African-American I cannot help but wonder: how many more young black men and women have to be called out of their names, bullied, harassed, and exorcised of their "gay demons" before we open our eyes and see the damage we are doing? Can we learn to love and accept them just as they are and teach them how to love and accept themselves in return? I say yes, we can.

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The author of this timely and very relevant piece is E.N Jackson, a freelance writer and Fort Wayne resident. I commend her for speaking out as she has. Comments can be sent to her at treeofwysdm@gmail.com. Visit her blog at thebeehive09.blogspot.com.

Bullied 11-Year-Old Hangs Himself

There are times when it's hard for me to hold back my anger at the Christianists who seem to do everything in their power to sow hatred against gays and those perceived to be gay with absolutely no regard for the lives being ruined on a daily basis. A sad story out of Massachusetts demonstrates what happens when individuals feel that they are morally superior - and perhaps even doing God's work - in tormenting LGBT youths and individuals. As a parent, I cannot imagine the fury and pain that the family of Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover (in the photo), particularly since his mother made weekly pleas to his school to address the problem of anti-gay bullying that he was enduring. What a horrible waste! I hope the family sues the school since unfortunately it seems that only the fear of large monetary judgments is the only thing that gets school administrators to do what's right. Here are highlights from GLESEN that tell this sad tale:

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An 11-year-old Massachusetts boy, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, hung himself Monday after enduring bullying at school, including daily taunts of being gay, despite his mother’s weekly pleas to the school to address the problem. This is at least the fourth suicide of a middle-school aged child linked to bullying this year.

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Carl, a junior at New Leadership Charter School in Springfield who did not identify as gay, would have turned 12 on April 17, the same day hundreds of thousands of students will participate in the 13th annual National Day of Silence by taking some form of a vow of silence to bring attention to anti-LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) bullying and harassment at school. The other three known cases of suicide among middle-school students took place in Chatham, Evanston and Chicago, Ill., in the month of February.

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"As was the case with Carl, you do not have to identify as gay to be attacked with anti-LGBT language," Byard said. "From their earliest years on the school playground, students learn to use anti-LGBT language as the ultimate weapon to degrade their peers. In many cases, schools and teachers either ignore the behavior or don’t know how to intervene."

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Nearly 9 out of 10 LGBT youth (86.2%) reported being verbally harassed at school in the past year because of their sexual orientation, nearly half (44.1%) reported being physically harassed and about a quarter (22.1%) reported being physically assaulted, according to GLSEN’s 2007 National School Climate Survey of more than 6,000 LGBT students.

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GLSEN recommends four simple approaches schools can take to begin addressing bullying now. Said Walker in the Springfield Republican: "If anything can come of this, it's that another child doesn't have to suffer like this and there can be some justice for some other child. I don't want any other parent to go through this."