Lindsey Graham's Queer Predicament

"Lady G" with Trump.

Over the weekend I wrote about the latest round in the long running story about South Carolina's closeted U.S. Senator, Lindsey Graham - or "Lady G' or "Lady Graham" as the story has exploded across the twitter sphere.  In my post, I argued that the hypocrisy of closeted elected officials who support anti-gay policies and parties make them targets for "outing" and proper subjects of mainstream media investigation.  Sadly, many in the mainstream media are squeamish about the issue just as they use false equivalency as an excuse for not calling out politicians - think Donald Trump - for the liars that they are.  In a column Michelangelo Signorile makes the further argument that closeted politicians need to be outed because if they will lie about something so core as their sexual orientation, they will lie about many other things.  In Grahams case, I would argue that it also sets him up for blackmail by the crime boss in chief in the White House. Yes, Graham is terrified of the GOP base in his home state, but I suspect that he's even more afraid of whatever information Trump has on him. That fear makes him only too willing to sell out both his constituent and the nation.  Here are column highlights:

Let’s begin with Aaron Schock, while I have your attention.

First elected in 2008, he’s the disgraced, former Republican congressman from Illinois who stood against LGBTQ rights — including voting against “don’t ask, don’t tell” repeal, and coming out against marriage equality — though it was an open secret in Washington and in queer circles that he was gay throughout that entire time. There was discussion that he was gay even before the White House picnic in 2010 and the photo of him in white pants, teal belt and pink gingham shirt that went viral, but he’d denied it in 2004 in an interview.

Schock was allowed to present himself in the media as a bachelor whose college friends had all married while he was too busy in politics — but who would presumably marry when the right woman came along.

And yet, the open secret persisted. Schock denied he was gay again when I asked him on the floor of the Republican National Convention in Tampa in 2012 for a response to those who believe he is gay and that he had voted against his own people.

Schock resigned in 2015 after a report about his Downton Abbey-inspired office set off a chain of investigations about his lavish lifestyle using taxpayer dollars and campaign funds. He was eventually indicted on 24 counts ( though, with a good lawyer, he struck an outrageous sweetheart deal in which all charges were dropped if he paid back the IRS and his campaign).

Then, this past March, Schock finally came out as gay, after living it up as a private citizen for some time, visiting gay vacation destinations and party spots, enjoying the very liberation that he worked with our enemies to try to destroy.

Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, too, has been discussed as gay for years, with those on both the left and the right hinting at it or saying it outright. He, too, has denied he is gay, most recently in 2018.

And yet, the discussion persists — as it did with Schock — and over the weekend, as reported by Towleroad, Twitter lit up with claims that an army of sex workers may be coming forward to speak out about Graham having hired them in the past, after gay adult film actor Sean Harding tweeted on Friday that it was time to reveal the truth about a “homophobic Republican Senator who is no better than Trump,” whom he referred to as “LG.” Harding claimed “every sex worker [he] know[s] has been hired by this man.”

“LadyG and “LadyGraham” — the alleged nicknames used by the sex workers — were soon trending, and tweets went viral that came from people claiming they had evidence, some of them claiming it was first hand. Harding, overwhelmed with inquiries, eventually set his Twitter feed to private, and on Sunday he tweeted:

Due to death threats against me and my family — and having my mom call me pleading to make it stop I will no longer be commenting on the LG story here. I know one individual has spoken to two prestigious media outlets with evidence but I'm not sure when that story will break.

It would be nice to think that mainstream media — or as Harding put it, “prestigious media outlets” — are finally getting it right, though I’ve learned not to hold my breath.

The closet, for powerful politicians, becomes a sort of practice run at the art of deception on a grander scale. And when you will sell out your own kind, there’s really no telling how low you will go.

Had journalists at mainstream outlets with vast resources, legal teams and researchers, been pursuing Schock for the hypocrisy of his anti-LGBTQ votes — and revealed that he was gay, with clear-cut evidence — it wouldn’t only have likely stopped an anti-gay hypocrite; it would likely have brought down a man who was spending campaign and taxpayer dollars to live in grand style and luxuriously travel around the world.

Back in 2006 when Mike Rogers, the founder of the site Blogactive — which exposed a slew of hypocritical, closeted gay politicians — revealed with detailed sources that Idaho GOP senator Larry Craig was gay, much of the mainstream media wouldn’t go near it.

They refused to follow up or track down the story further. It wasn’t until nine months later when “wide-stance” Craig was arrested for trying to have sex in an airport men’s room in Minneapolis that the mainstream media was all over it. Craig was then forced to resign, and the hypocrisy of the anti-LGBTQ Republican Party was on display.

But like Schock’s criminal activity, Craig’s arrest is the only thing that brought him down. If not for that action, involving criminal charges and thus a public record, he might still be in office, still railing against LGBTQ people. For much of the mainstream media, exposing a homophobe isn’t worth their time and effort — nor the resources of their newsrooms.

Even now, when the media is taking more seriously the issue of sexual harassment and tracking down stories of assault against women by powerful men, stories they once ignored but rightly now are focusing on — even when a story turns out to lose credibility — they still don’t see the story of the closeted hypocrite as one to investigate and report on.

Let me be clear: I’m not equating sexual harassment and assault with sexual orientation: I’m equating hypocrisy, deception and abuse of power that affects marginalized groups.

Gay Porn Star Threatens to Out Lindsey Graham

I have caught flack over the years for referring to GOP Senator Lindsey Graham as the "Palmetto Queen."  Generally, I believe that when one comes out is a personal decision with one exception: if you hold elected office and are in the closet and supporting anti-gay policies and/or anti-gay politicians, then you are open game for "outing."  It's a simple matter of exposing hypocrites.  Rumors have swirled around Lindsey Graham for years, but his self-prostitution to Donald Trump, a man who is waging war on LGBT Americans, has made outing him a high priority if he's a closeted gay and aiding those harming the LGBT community.   If Graham is a closeted hypocrite, then he deserves to be outed.  FitNews based in South Carolina) has details on the latest rumors about about Graham.  Here are excerpts:

Around the time most South Carolinians were sitting down to their evening meals on Thursday night, a gay porn star by the name of Sean Harding fired off a tweet that set tongues-a-wagging across the Palmetto State (and in the nation’s capital).

“There is a homophobic republican senator who is no better than (Donald Trump) who keeps passing legislation that is damaging to the LGBT and minority communities,” Harding tweeted. “Every sex worker I know has been hired by this man. Wondering if enough of us spoke out if that could get him out of office?” Wait … what?

“I cannot do this alone,” Harding added in a follow-up tweet. “If you’d be willing to stand with me against LG please let me know.”

Considering there is only one member of the U.S. Senate with those initials, speculation quickly turned (again) to U.S. senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, who has been dodging rumors like this for the better part of the last decade. This time, though, the allegation quickly took on a life of its own. By Friday afternoon, the hashtag “Lady G” – which is purportedly Graham’s nickname among male sex workers – was trending on Twitter.

Just when you thought 2020 couldn’t get any crazier, right?

For years (most recently in October 2018), Graham has denied being a homosexual.

“I know it’s really gonna upset a lot of gay men – I’m sure hundreds of ’em are gonna be jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge – but I ain’t available,” he famously told The New York Times Magazine in 2010. “I ain’t gay. Sorry.”

Still, the rumors have persisted … with many of Graham’s conservative opponents espousing the theory that he was being manipulated (or blackmailed) politically due to secrets surrounding his sexuality.

To be clear: This news outlet does not care about Graham’s sexual orientation. In fact, the sooner we can stop contemplating whatever might turn on the 64-year-old Central, S.C. native, the better.

We are much more concerned with Graham’s chameleon-esque inability to settle on a political orientation. An erstwhile #NeverTrumper, he flip-flopped and began supporting Trump in late 2017 when it became clear he was about to lose his seat.
Were we surprised? No … everything with this guy is calculation.

Thankfully, there are those in Trump’s orbit who are able to see this career chameleon for what he is … an ally in name only.

We think his votes are bad … and we would like to see him out of office. But we are not going to vilify him over something in his personal life without a damn good reason. Like abuse of power. Something involving tax money. Overt hypocrisy. Or maybe … a clown mask?

Graham is facing a tougher-than-expected fight this fall from Democrat Jaime Harrison, who has attracted significant national support (and raised some serious cash) in his bid to oust the third-term lawmaker. Harrison, incidentally, has been the focus of similar rumors over the years … which we care as much about as the rumors surrounding Graham.

Still, something about this particular installment of the “Lindsey Graham is about to be outed” rumor that seems … different. Lots of national reporters are clearly chasing it (including several who have called our news desk), and the chatter about numerous male escorts contemplating the consequences of violating alleged nondisclosure agreements seems curiously (disturbingly) specific.

Stay tuned … we will have to wait and see what the future holds for the senior senator from South Carolina as he battles the latest (and greatest) round of rumors.

Utah Mormon Republican Comes Out as Gay: He "Could Not Continue to Live a Lie”

Nathan Ivie — Photo: Facebook

Those of us of older generations and/or raised in anti-gay religious traditions often struggle for years trying to "pray away the gay" or even undergoing fraudulent "conversion therapy" in order to meet family or religious denomination expectations.  Having undergone this struggle myself for decades, I can assure straight readers that it is a living hell filled with self-hate and self-loathing and, at least in my own case, constant thoughts of suicide which eventually lead to two serious attempts which landed me in the hospital.  Eventually many of us - unless one is Rick Santorum or Ken Cuccinelli - reach a point where we simply no longer have the strength to continue to live a lie and live our lives as actors on a stage playing an assigned role. To say that it is exhausting and soul killing is an understatement.

This is not to say that those of us who married spouses of the opposite gender did not love that other person as much as a gay can romantically love an  opposite gender spouse.  I/we did love them, yet felt guilt because in our heart we could not be what they deserved. This damage to both the gay spouse and the straight spouse is the direct fruit of right wing Christians' - and Muslims' - rejection of modern medical and mental health knowledge on sexual orientation.  Rather than admit that their cherished religious dogma is wrong, these fundamentalist prefer to ruin countless lives. 

As Metro Weekly is reporting, a Mormon Republican  from the state of Utah finally reached the point I reached 18 years ago where he simply could no longer live the lie.  Here are article excerpts:

A Republican lawmaker in Utah has come out as gay after working with families who lost their LGBTQ children to suicide.  Nathan Ivie, a Utah County Commissioner, posted a four-minute video to his Facebook page saying that he had been fighting his sexuality since age 9.

The forty-year-old also detailed a suicide attempt in his early 20s, and said he wanted to help struggling LGBTQ youth know that life is worth living.

“There’s no easy way to say this, I might as well just jump up and say it — I’m gay,” Ivie, who is also Mormon, said. “That’s my reality and that’s what I need to talk to you about today.” Ivie said he had spent “decades…wrestling with who I really am,” and that accepting his sexuality had “not been easy.”

“I understand the impact my discoveries have had and will have on others, yet I’m still the same person I’ve always been,” he said. “I hope, to you, this part of my life doesn’t become my defining trait.”

Ivie said that, when he first realized his sexuality at age 9, he “believed there was something wrong with me.”  “I fought from the beginning to find some way to change myself,” Ivie said. “That battle resulted in a failed suicide attempt when I was 22 years old.”

After recovering from what he called a “near tragedy,” Ivie said he “tried to live the life that was expected of me.” “The truth is, I never felt comfortable in my own skin,” he continued. “I felt I was living someone else’s life rather than my own.”

Ivie said that while he was “as committed today as I have ever been to my faith, family and freedom,” he realized he “could not continue to live a lie. It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t right for anyone.”

The politician noted that he and his wife had separated, but that she remains his best friend and they have discussed at length how to “move forward as a different kind of family to fulfill the responsibilities we took on together to our two amazing children.”

Ivie said he was aware that some would neither understand nor accept his announcement, but that he would “continue to serve my county as Utah County commissioner with all of my heart. I know there are haters in every area of our lives, but we cannot let that be what defines us as a community.”

Ivie said his decision to come out was inspired by working with families who have lost LGBTQ children to suicide.  “That really makes you reevaluate your life, and what you’re doing as a leader to prevent that kind of stuff,” he said.

He added that he wanted young LGBTQ people to know that “it’s OK to be different, it’s OK to live authentically. You can be gay and a Republican…. You need to trust that people will love you for who you really are.”

Speaking to the Salt Lake Tribune, he noted that “somewhere out there” is a younger version of him, who is contemplating taking their own life, and that he wants them to know that it’s worth continuing to live.  “They need to know that it is,” Ivie said. “They need to know they’re valued, they’re loved.”

Tanner Ainge, who serves alongside Ivie on the Utah County Commission, tweeted his support for Ivie’s announcement.

“My instinct is just to embrace [Nathan],” he tweeted. “Today I stand with him as a friend, valued colleague, and fellow Republican. His story will provide strength and hope to those feeling the lonely despair that almost took his life and has taken too many in our community.”

Utah has one of the highest youth suicide rates in America - in my view probably in no small part due the the Mormon Church's historic homophobia.  In my own case, I think I knew from around age 12 that I was gay, but my Catholic upbringing in then conservative Central New York  and family expectations - not to mention the fact that homosexuality was at the time classified as a mental illness - made accepting my true self impossible.  Suicide seemed a far better solution to my problem. Kudos to Ivie for coming out and striving to stop LGBT youth suicides. 

It’s Dangerous to Forget about Mike Pence

With all the focus on Donald Trump and the FBI's launch of an investigation  of his possible role as an agent of Russia and his efforts to hide communications with Russia, including interpreter notes from one on one meetings with Vladimir Putin, it is easy to lose sight of the fact that a removal of Trump from office could potentially hand the White House to Mike Pence, provided, of course, Pence is not swept up into the effort to collude with Russia.  As noted a number of times before on this blog, Pence is about as extreme as one can get and has an ugly history of embracing discrimination, particularly anti-LGBT discrimination.  Moreover, like Rick Santorum and Ken Cuccinelli (who are a  little too hysterically anti-gay), Pence has all of the hallmarks of an extreme self-loathing closeted gay who believes attacks on the LGBT community are his best camouflage for his hidden "secret." His wife, Karen Pence, a/k/a mother per Pence himself, is not much better given her current work with a school that bans gay employees.  Thus, removing Trump who is demonstratively unfit for office could place someone equally unhinged in but a different way in a position to do great harm.  A piece in The Progressive looks at Trump's ugly history. Here are excerpts:

Since his Inauguration, Trump’s merry-go-round administration has been a consistent source of horror and amusement, most recently illustrated in Michaels Wolff’s expose, Fire and Fury. In the midst of the chaotic palace intrigue, one man seems to remain above the fray: Vice President Michael Richard Pence.

But it’s a bad idea to lose track of Mike Pence, particularly if you care about gay, lesbian, trans, and queer rights. In many ways, the Vice President has made attacking LGBTQ+ rights the cornerstone of his political career. And a look at his past crusades against this community leaves little room for doubt that he will continue that mission. 

As Vice President, he has made six tie breaking votes in Senate, more than Vice Presidents Al Gore and Joe Biden combined. He cast the final vote scrapping federal rules to protect consumers from predatory financial organizations, what Senator Elizabeth Warren called a “giant wet kiss to Wall Street.”

It was Pence’s vote that confirmed Trump nominee Betsy DeVos as Secretary of Education and kickstarted a debate on Obamacare repeal. Most controversial, perhaps, was Pence’s approval of a bill to allow states to withhold federal funds for Planned Parenthood and other organizations providing reproductive healthcare, a longtime goal of Pence and his rightwing evangelical Christian allies.

Predictably, Pence used religious justification to push his agenda. “The day Obamacare passed was also a day of disappointment for the sanctity of life, but hope is finally shining through,” Pence said. “When this bill passes, it will be one of the defining victories for life.” According to a March 2017 poll, 75 percent of Americans, Republicans as well as Democrats, support the federal government’s continued funding of Planned Parenthood.

From early in his career, Pence has expressed outlier views. . . . . In an op-ed in 2000, Pence denied the correlation between smoking cigarettes and mortality. . . . . In similar fashion, Pence has denied global warming, citing “growing skepticism among scientists” about climate change and saying CO2 from fossil fuels can’t increase temperatures because it “is a naturally occurring phenomenon in nature.” He has also dismissed climate change as “an issue for the left."

But it is toward the gay community that Pence has expressed his most extreme views, so much so that Donald Trump once joked that Pence “wants to hang them all.”

In 2006, as head of the Republican Study Committee, a group of the most-conservative House members, he defended marriage as between a man and a woman and argued that any change to that threatens the stability of society.

In 2010, he opposed the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” which barred military service people from openly identifying as gay, claiming the military was no place for “social experimentation.” The website for his 2000 congressional campaign asserted that funding for HIV prevention “should be directed toward those institutions which provide assistance to those seeking to change their sexual behavior.”

Pence gained infamy that same year for a pushing a bill to jail same-sex couples who applied for marriage licenses.

The passing of the Religious Freedom Restoration Act was met with outrage by companies, celebrities, and thousands of Indiana residents. Angie’s List cancelled its $40 million expansion in Indianapolis, a move that would have brought a thousand new jobs to Indiana. New York, Washington, Connecticut, and Vermont all banned state-funded travel to Indiana. . . . Even the Republican mayor of Indianapolis, Greg Ballard, called on the legislature to repeal the bill, saying it “sends the wrong signal.”

Following the backlash, Pence signed a revised amendment to the bill, barring businesses from discriminating based on gender identity or sexual orientation. However, statewide laws concerning discrimination outside the workplace remained unchanged.

Pence’s dogged championing of “religious freedom” at the expense of civil rights for LGTBQ+ people poses equally dangerous threats for groups already very vulnerable to prejudice and violence.

In twenty-eight states, LGBTQ+ people don’t have anti-discrimination laws that protect them in the workplace, housing, and public accommodations.

And Pence remains dedicated to rolling back civil rights protections for LGBTQ+ people. He was behind the implementation of a transgender ban in the military, an effort subsequently blocked by federal judges. He also championed the transgender bathroom ban in public schools, a policy Trump later adopted.

A survey by the Human Rights Campaign released in January 2017 showed that 36 percent of transgender youth reported being personally bullied or harassed, and 56 percent had changed their self-expression or future plans since the election.  Just recently, on December 28, Kerrice Lewis, a lesbian woman of colour, was shot and burnt alive in the trunk of a car in Washington, D.C.

In pushing “religious freedom” at the explicit expense of this community’s safety and well-being, Mike Pence reveals the depth of his dangerous bias. A country that allows discrimination on the basis of race, sexual orientation, or gender identity is not a country with equal rights.

The Flagrant Sexual Hypocrisy of Conservative Republican Males

I make a point in many of my posts of highlighting the hypocrisy of Republicans who find themselves embroiled in sex related scandals for several reasons.  First, to point out that with the exception of Anthony Weiner, the scandals almost always involve Republicans, not Democrats.  Second, to underscore the hypocrisy of both those caught in the scandals, but also of those who vote for them.  These voters feign piety yet display a level of hypocrisy that would make the biblical Pharisees blush (e.g., the highest. use of Internet porn is in the Bible Belt; evangelical Christians have the highest divorce rate, etc.).  In the wake of "family values", "pro-life" Republican Tim Murphy's decision to resign his seat in Congress after being caught in an abortion scandal, a column in the New York Times offers a welcomed compilation of a number of Republican hypocrites.  Here are excerpts:

The most recent culprit in the category of anti-abortion double-think is Tim Murphy, a Pennsylvania Republican who on Thursday announced he would resign from his House seat this month. Two days before, Mr. Murphy had voted for a bill that would ban abortion after 20 weeks on the medically dubious grounds that, at that age, a fetus can experience pain. 

Then The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette published texts revealing that when Mr. Murphy’s mistress thought she was pregnant, he urged her to consider an abortion.

Sound familiar? Perhaps Mr. Murphy’s story calls to mind the Tennessee congressman Scott DesJarlais, who is similarly pro-life in the streets, pro-choice in the sheets.

In 2015, Mr. DesJarlais voted in favor of a 20-week ban, and boasted of a “100 percent pro-life voting record” while in Congress. Meanwhile, The Chattanooga Times Free Press reported that he supported his ex-wife’s decision to have two abortions (no word on how far along she was) and encouraged a patient with whom he was having an affair to terminate her pregnancy as well. Like Mr. Murphy, he is a co-sponsor of the abortion bill that passed on Tuesday. It’s a child, not a choice, abortion opponents tell us. Unless the pregnancy is embarrassing and super-inconvenient and an impediment to your political future, in which case it’s merely a clump of cells.
 The double standards employed by some members of the “do as I say, not as I do” Christian right are nothing new. Show me a senator who votes against gay marriage, and, at least in one infamous case, I’ll show you a guy who’s soliciting same-sex encounters in the airport men’s room. (Hello there, Larry Craig!)

Show me another Republican senator who made his name as a “pro-family advocate” and I’ll show you a guy whose phone number showed up in a Washington madam’s little black book. (Howdy, David Vitter!)

Show me the far-right speaker of the House, a man with perfect scores from the National Right to Life Committee and the Christian Coalition, and I’ll show you a guy who, as a high-school wrestling coach, set up a chair in front of the boys’ shower the better to ogle his protégés, and who was eventually jailed as a serial child molester. (Dennis Hastert, come on down!)

We’ve been down this road of duplicity before. The televangelist who prayed, alongside his wife, for the return of traditional morals, admitted to having sex with — and was accused of rape by — a 21-year-old church secretary, and found to have paid her $279,000. The congressman who voted for the Defense of Marriage Act was sexting with his underage male pages.

Scandals roll by so frequently that there is, by now, an expected script: the shocking revelation, the tearful confession, the up-from-the-ashes reinstatement plea or re-election campaign, garlanded with declarations of “God/my wife/Willie Robertson, star of ‘Duck Dynasty’ has forgiven me, why can’t you?” Perhaps the most shocking part of Mr. Murphy’s story is that he elected to quit, rather than scream “Fake news!” or sit back and wait for a new story to eclipse his hypocrisy, as Mr. DesJarlais did.

But what Mr. Murphy’s moral flexibility ultimately reveals is that, for these particular hard-line anti-abortion politicians, it’s not about fetal pain or the sanctity of life. It’s all about control — whether you’re telling a woman she can’t have an abortion, or forcing a woman to get one.

To this list we need to add former Virginia 2nd District Congressman Ed Schrock who voted anti-gay in Congress and meanwhile was seeking gay sex trysts.    Of course, there are even more than could be added to the list besides Schrock.

Missouri Republican: Homosexuality is Different from Being a Human

Rick Bratinn: self-loath closeted gay or pandering political whore?

One of the tactics used by the Nazi regime to set the stage for the Holocaust was a never ending propaganda campaign to depict Jews as less than human.  Jews were described as a threat to children, disease ridden and many other horrible things.  This Nazi tactic was adopted by fundamentalist and evangelical Christians years ago now and directed at the LGBT community.  Again, the goal has been to dehumanize gays and to in the process make their mistreatment  acceptable to the "godly folk." Indeed, change "Jew" to "gay" and some of the Christofascists propaganda reads nearly verbatim with that of the Nazis.  Typically, Christofacscists stop short of flat out saying gays are subhuman.  Not so with Missouri state representative Rick Brattin - likely a closeted gay himself given the track record of virulently anti-gay Republicans - who flat out said that being homosexual is something different from being a human being.  In a main editorial, the Kansas City Star takes Brattin to task.  Here are excerpts:

Rick Brattin, a Missouri state representative from Harrisonville, seems pretty certain: Homosexuality and humanity are incompatible.

“When you look at the tenets of religion, of the Bible, of the Qur’an, of other religions,” he said Monday, “there is a distinction between homosexuality and just being a human being.”

The statement, made on the Missouri House floor, was deplorable. It betrayed a stunning lack of understanding of theology and self-government: The Constitution protects all Americans from the tyranny of any single faith-based approach to secular law.

We asked Rep. Brattin to explain his statement, but he did not return a phone call to his office.

It isn’t the first time state Brattin has tripped over the Constitution.

He has sought an equal footing for teaching creationism in public schools. He proposed requiring the father’s consent before an abortion except in cases of “legitimate rape.”

It’s a disappointing record. Sadly, some of Brattin’s colleagues appear to sympathize with his views.

Monday, state lawmakers tried to pass an amendment prohibiting discrimination in the state on the basis of sexual orientation or gender status. In Missouri, you can still be fired because the boss thinks you might be gay.

Brattin made his statement during the debate on that amendment. But it quickly became clear that there were not enough votes to pass the plan, leaving gays and lesbians still unprotected by Missouri’s discrimination law.

That sends exactly the wrong message about tolerance in the state.

It gets worse. After all the amendments were dropped, including the protections for gays and lesbians, the House passed Senate Bill 43, a measure that would actually make it more difficult to sue for discrimination.

The bill is another unnecessary blemish on the state. . . . . what business wants to operate in a state that tolerates discrimination? Or a state where a representative thinks gays and lesbians are less than human?

The states that grow in the 21st century will be those that show tolerance, acceptance and intelligence. Missouri’s lawmakers are sending a clear signal this state is not any of those things.  The governor should veto the bill. And Brattin should apologize.

The Double Standard on Male Nudity and Sexuality

The image that was labeled "deeply offensive"

For almost its entire existence, this blog has posted "male beauty" photos which celebrate the male form and what at least I view as beautiful males.  Critics said that I should omit these posts, but a poll I once set up on the blog showed that 70% of readers said "keep the pictures!"  (Women readers were most vocal on retaining the male beauty posts.)  Why is it fine to glorify - or objectify depending on one's outlook - women, but not men?  The reality is that if one looks at almost any fashion magazine, woman are depicted in all manner of undress and perhaps objectification. The same treatment of males, however, is something that is rare outside of gay publications and blogs.  A piece in Huffington Post looks at the puritanical double standard and the bizarre aspect of American society and male indoctrination that makes male beauty and sexuality something scary.  Here are article excerpts:

The photo in question was my chosen pic for an article I wrote about, among other things, the selling of sex. The site removed the piece and banned me for a week, then sent me a not-safe-for-hurt-feelings email saying the photo was “deeply offensive” and “soft-core porn,” and that I ought to be ashamed of myself for placing it on a respectable, liberal site. They threatened me with permanent blockage if I ever tried such a stunt again, “even in jest.”

And I just thought the photo illustrated my satiric point.

Before I try and figure out the answer, let me post the entire photo, not just the cropped version used for this piece. This is your official warning, so you might want to lock the kids in the closet, close the curtains, hide the bibles, keep the smelling salts handy, and chain yourself to something secure so you don’t throw yourself out the window or jump into oncoming traffic.

But why is it “deeply offensive” and “soft-core porn”? The Urban Dictionary’s Top Definition for the latter is “pornographic material that shows everything excluding insertion or penetration.” Other examples say penetration with a partner and masturbation is okay provided you don’t show ejaculation or an erection or cunnilingus. Playboy is often depicted as soft-core porn.

Forgetting for a moment that the photo has been displayed on mainstream gay sites worldwide, and that almost every “serious” cable show now shows male nudity, Grand isn’t naked in the photo—you don’t even see the Facebook-forbidden butt-crack or pubic hair. He’s not masturbating, there’s no partner, unless you count the showerhead, and he’s not erect. He’s wearing the male version of the type of undergarment female Victoria Secret models show off on posters and commercials and TV ads on a daily basis.

[M]y educated guess is that the photo was removed, and I was body-posting shamed, because you can see an imprint of Grand’s penis. (I hate to sound vulgar, but I felt it necessary to use the technical term.) It’s also homoerotic.

We’ve come along way in regards to male nudity and homoerotism (while straight women are likely to get excited by this photo, the artistic feel of the shot, the clothing, the openly gay model, are geared toward homosexual men). But for reasons that I still don’t understand, we’re major prudes when it comes to male genitalia.

This makes sense in the GOP world, where all risqué photos are taboo and all semi-naked men are an abomination (unless the former are nude modeling pics of the First Lady in lesbian-bondage poses and the latter are the male prostitutes they found on Grindr). We know they’re hypocrites.

Penis-phobia in the progressive world is far more surprising. You’d be hard-pressed to spend a day on social media or looking at ads without finding allusions to male anatomy. It’s everywhere, even in our political discussions. It’s in our puns, our jokes, our masculine “measure of worth”—you can’t even write a sentence about the subject without unintentionally finding a pun. Yet show any suggestion of it in the open and it’s a crude, graphic display.

Not only is this a perverse double-standard, and one that adversely affects the gay community, it reinforces the notion that the male body is shameful. When we’re only allowed to allude to it, and not celebrate it the way we do the female form, it’s tantamount to saying our admiration should be kept in the closet. I’ve met few straight men who will admit they appreciate the nude male body, and many who won’t even admit that a man’s face is attractive. That’s an unhealthy way to live and a choice most women ignore.

Our macho sensibility tells men it’s wrong to admire each other’s physicality, which leads to insecurity, fear, and a general lack of self-awareness.

It’s also time to stop the patriarchal, outdated nonsense about male genitalia and start treating the male body in the manner it deserves: as a thing of beauty, as something to admire, to be inspired by, to get excited about, to love, and to look at.

A parting thought: Could the double standard be due to (i) GOP and Christofascist males being afraid of the desire such images invoke in them, and (ii) such photos reminding the majority of straight males that they look like Hell physically? 

Hypocrisy on Parade: Craigslist M4M Ads Surge During CPAC

UPDATED: Apparently the Human Rights Campaign ran this ad on Grindr in the Washington, DC, area during the CPAC convention:

As noted earlier, the hypocrisy of these "conservatives" and evangelical Christians is breathtaking.

There's been lots of media coverage of the Conservative Political Action Conference ("CPAC") this past week where alt-right types, Christofascist extremists, and lots of closeted gays gathered in Washington, DC, to push their extremist agenda and prostitute themselves to Trump's new neo-fascist regime.  Except you didn't see or hear anything about the closeted gays unless you were to check out the Craigslist ads for male on male sex.  On those pages one found one of the hallmarks of Republican and conservative gatherings: lots of closeted men out of town and on the make for a taste of forbidden fruit.  (Something similar happens at every GOP convention.  On a somewhat related note, here in Hampton each year when Hampton University hosts a gathering of conservative and supposedly non-alcohol drinking pastors, the nearby liquor stores sell out).  Queerty checked out the Craigslist ads and offers a sampling of the hypocrisy of the Bible thumpers at CPAC.  Here are excerpts:

Milo may have had his invitation rescinded, but let’s not fool ourselves thinking he was the only gay in the village.

The Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC), Washington D.C.’s annual gathering of regressive thinkers from all walks of life, actually has a cruisey gay underbelly.

Last year we heard from some of these exotic birds when a journalist roamed the halls and arranged interviews via Grindr.

This year we have a few deeper glimpses into their mating rituals through Craigslist personals. Yep, those things are still around.

Here’s what’s going on around the convention that Mike Pence probably isn’t going to mention during his key note address:

“Any other CPAC guys here?” begins one innocent-sounding ad.

Then he gets to the meat of it:

“I’m looking for one or more guys who want to have some fun. Will be here til Sunday. Maybe we could meet at the reception tonight, or over a drink at the bar…or f*ck it, we could just go back to my room and dive right in. Got room to myself the rest of the week/end (girlfriend had to leave), so I’m ready to let a little loose.”

Charming, his girlfriend is one lucky lady.

Another ad from a man who signs off as just “Dad” is searching for different kind of Red State Special:

“If you are a real hot boy, who is clean and discreet and thinks straight, like I do and you have a certain ‘itch’ that need scratching, please contact this ‘DILF’, next door type who is a great lover and a really nice man and the possessor of just what you need!
You should do this. It will be good for you and make you a happier boy. HMU.”

Then there’s the guy looking for a “cornfed Republican,” and preferably someone like “those Romney boys.”

They’re all yours, we’ll pass.

And let’s not leave out the “CPAC Aryan mil jock ISO dom owner,” because he just sounds like a real catch.

Will these guys find what they’re looking for? Will Ben Carson fall asleep on stage? Will Ricky Perry answer one or more of these ads?

"Not Gay" Louisiana Republican Admits to Sexting, Kissing Teen Boy

Republican Mike Yenni admits to an illicit relationship with an underage boy

Republicans and their puppet masters at Christian "family values" hate groups continue to hyperventilate about the dangers of transgender individuals using restrooms that conform to their gender identity, but out of Louisiana we are seeing another example of the real danger to children and youths is Republican elected officials (conservative "Christian" pastors and Catholic priests, of course, lead the way in child molestation).  In this instance, the GOP elected official sent a 17-year-old boy sexually charged text messages and gave him a “graduation present” pair of racy designer underwear, but claims that nothing else happened and that he's "not gay."  Yeah, and I'm Queen Victoria too!  A piece in The Raw Story looks at this matter which sadly is so common among Republicans that it is almost becoming non-newsworthy since such situations - and arrest made during solicitations for sex in restrooms - seem to happen weekly, if not more frequently.  Here are article highlights:

A Louisiana parish president admits that he sent a then-17-year-old boy sexually charged text messages and gave him a “graduation present” pair of racy designer underwear, but insists that he was only “playing along” with the teen and that no sexual contact took place.

The New Orleans Advocate reported Friday that Republican Mike Yenni characterized his relationship with the underage student at his alma mater Jesuit High School as a “lapse in judgment” and said that calls for his resignation are politically motivated.
 “I can’t explain why I did it,” the married, 40-year-old Yenni told New Orleans’ Fox 8 News. He maintained that many of the details revealed in a 2015 blog post by the boy about the affair were false and that he never had sexual contact with the teen beyond kissing, nor was he grooming the boy for a sexual relationship.
 Fox 8’s Lee Zurik asked Yenni what his intent was in exchanging erotic texts with a teen.

“I can’t…I really can’t answer it,” said Yenni. “I mean, it was just…it was a stupid action. It was a stupid action to even get into this form of text messaging. It was something…something that I can’t explain why I did it.”

Yenni met the boy at a Jesuit High School function. They began to exchange sexually charged messages. Yenni visited the boy at his job at a local mall and presented him with a pair of underwear. They kissed, but Yenni insists that was their only contact, which was not illegal because the age of consent for boys in Louisiana is 17.

A year after the liaison, the boy published an account of the affair, which was picked up by what Yenni calls a “tabloid.” He declined to address the accusations against him line by line . . .

“I’m not gay,” Yenni replied.

New Study: Homophobes Try to Deny Their Own Same Sex Attraction

The findings of yet another study suggest that the males expressing the loudest homophobia may in fact be striving to deny and/or cover up their own same sex attraction.   These results come on top of studies going back to 1996 that found that homophobic men had the most penile stimulation when looking at gay pornography.  A summary of that study noted as follows:

The authors investigated the role of homosexual arousal in exclusively heterosexual men who admitted negative affect toward homosexual individuals. Participants consisted of a group of homophobic men and a group of nonhomophobic men; they were assigned to groups on the basis of their scores on the Index of Homophobia (W. W. Hudson & W. A. Ricketts, 1980). The men were exposed to sexually explicit erotic stimuli consisting of heterosexual, male homosexual, and lesbian videotapes, and changes in penile circumference were monitored. Both groups exhibited increases in penile circumference to the heterosexual and female homosexual videos. Only the homophobic men showed an increase in penile erection to male homosexual stimuli. Homophobia is apparently associated with homosexual arousal that the homophobic individual is either unaware of or denies.

The new study took a different approach by recording eye-tracking when homosexual erotica was viewed and found - not surprisingly, in my view - that the most homophobic males lingered the longest on gay erotica.   Here's a summary:

Heterosexual men first completed a scale measuring their level of homonegativity. Then, they performed a manikin task to evaluate their impulsive approach tendencies toward homosexual stimuli (IAHS). A picture-viewing task was performed with simultaneous eye-tracking recording to assess participants' viewing time of the visual area of interest (i.e., face and body).  IAHS positively predicted the viewing time of homosexual photographs among men with a high score of homonegativity. Men with a high homonegativity score looked significantly longer at homosexual than at heterosexual photographs but only when they had a high IAHS.

The take away?  The next time you hear some politician like Rick Santorum or Ken Cuccinelli or some pastor or priest/bishop/cardinal bellowing about the evil of gays, just remember that they probably would love to get into the pants of some of the males in their audience or congregation. Never be duped by "oh, but he's married with children."  Been there and done that myself, and it means NOTHING other than the fact that the individual could not accept them self and their true sexuality, most likely due to religious brainwashing..

Prosecutors Give Details on Dennis Hastert’s Sexual Abuse of Teenagers

As is often noted on this blog, if one is worried about stopping sexual predators, the focus should be on anti-gay Republican politicians (and conservative religious leaders), not gays and/or transgender individuals.  Over and over again we see GOP politicians with anti-gay voting records who espouse "family values" being caught having affairs, seeking gay sex, or in the case of former Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert, sexually molesting minors.  The Washington Post has details on Hastert's sexual misconduct that set the state for his attempts to pay over $3 million in hush money to one of his former victims.  Here are excerpts:

Federal prosecutors on Friday detailed some of the lurid allegations of sexual misconduct against former U.S. House speaker Dennis Hastert and asked a federal judge to subject the Illinois Republican to a sex offender evaluation.

In a memo in advance of an April 27 sentencing hearing, prosecutors spelled out in graphic detail how Hastert sexually molested or inappropriately touched five teenagers who trusted him as their wrestling coach. And as Hastert rose to power, believing that his wrongdoing would never be made public, his victims struggled with the effects of the abuse, prosecutors wrote.

“He made them feel alone, ashamed, guilty and devoid of dignity,” prosecutors wrote. “While defendant achieved great success, reaping all the benefits that went with it, these boys struggled, Hastert, 74, pleaded guilty last year to violating federal banking laws, admitting in a deal with prosecutors that he withdrew money from banks in increments low enough to avoid mandatory reporting requirements. Thatcharge, though, always belied the case’s actual underpinnings.and all are still struggling now with what defendant did to them.”

A federal law enforcement official has said Hastert withdrew the money so he could pay off someone he sexually molested decades ago. And after the first victim emerged, more people came forward alleging that they or their relatives were also victimized by the Yorkville, Ill., high school teacher and coach.

Prosecutors detailed remarkably similar stories from each of the now-grown men.

One — who said he was a 14-year-old freshman when the abuse occurred — alleged that Hastert told him to get on a table so he could “loosen him up,” then massaged and performed a sex act on him. Another — who said he was 17 years old when the abuse occurred — alleged that Hastert offered him a massage to help him cut weight, then performed a sex act on him. That victim said Hastert kept a chair in direct view of the locker room shower stalls.

“The federal and state statutes of limitations have long expired on potential charges relating to defendant’s known sexual acts against Individual A and other minors,” prosecutors wrote. “With this case, the government seeks to hold defendant accountable for the crimes he committed . . . . 

Sadly, Hastert is the poster boy for the hypocrisy of anti-gay Republicans who make a mockery of the professed devotion to "family values."  I have zero sympathy for Hastert.

Story on Virginia Republican Caught on Grindr Goes Viral

The other day this blog noted a story at GayRVA about an anti-gay Republican member of the Virginia House of Delegates who was caught using his Grindr account in Richmond to look for hookups while snowed in during the recent snow storm.   Since then, the story has gone viral and has been picked up by LGBT blogs around the country and has ignited yet another running debate of the propriety of "outing" closeted anti-gay politicians.  Some have criticized GayRVA for failing to reveal the identity of the legislator.  While I understand the concerns that lead to the decision to not reveal the individual's identity, I would likely have "outed" him after a little more investigation.  A piece in Metro Weekly looks at the debate and information that seemingly narrows down who this hypocrite is.  Here are highlights:

The Grindr-cruising lawmaker has voted:

• In favor of a “conscience clause” exemption allowing adoption agencies to discriminate against same-sex couples.
• In favor of allowing on-campus university clubs and groups to discriminate against LGBT individuals for the purposes of membership.
• Against an amendment that would have prohibited anti-LGBT discrimination in state employment.
• Against the nomination of Judge Tracy Thorne-Begland, Virginia’s first openly gay judge, to the Richmond General District Court.

[O]nline commenters have noted that the clues provided by Kutner essentially come close to revealing the lawmaker’s identity — for instance, while many Republicans voted against Thorne-Begland’s nomination for a judgeship when he was first nominated in 2012, only four currently-serving Republican lawmakers from Southwest Virginia were in the legislature and voted against Thorne-Begland’s subsequently successful nomination in 2013.

In an interview with Metro Weekly, Kutner said he’s received several requests from readers interested in learning the man’s identity.

“A Grindr conversation alone is debatable evidence,” Kutner says. “That certainly played a role into whether or not I wanted to out somebody, without really confirming things.

Kutner hopes the lawmaker will use this incident to think carefully the next time he’s faced with an LGBT-related piece of legislation, such as restricting the bathroom use of transgender students in school or granting county court clerks an exemption to refuse to issue marriage licenses.

But for those who insist that Kutner has a duty to “out” the closeted gay lawmaker, he says they’re missing the larger point: that the atmosphere in Virginia is so toxic that a person in a position of power feels the need to stay in the closet. 

“I’m not surprised to see people go on this witch-hunt, but outing this person is not going to make it illegal to fire gay people, it’s not going to remove the anti-gay animus. Honestly, it’s only going to make things more combative. . . . . we are flipping out to find out who’s gay — which is the same thing they’re doing,” he says. “Can you imagine Victoria Cobb right now, figuring out who she can out and try and ruin? It’s scary and weird. I’m not surprised by the reaction, but I would definitely like to see this energy shifted to a bit more of a positive place.”

Again, I understand the reasoning, but I would not have been so kind to this scum bag.   Dan Savage and I are on the same page in terms of the appropriateness of outing such politicians.  Here are excerpts from The Stranger:

I disagree: this legislator's votes against workplace protections for LGBT people, adoption rights for same-sex couples, and the judicial appointment of a qualified out gay man speak loudly of his hypocrisy and the the particular kind of damage done when closeted conservatives abuse their political power to protect their closets. We've heard this song about a thousand times before...

Just another closeted conservative asshole throwing other LGBT people under the bus—attacking other LGBT people with his votes—to deflect attention away from his own sexuality. He figures that no one will suspect him of being gay so long as he maintains a perfect anti-gay voting record—that more than qualifies this asshole for an outing. Here's hoping Internet sleuths are already on the case; there's more than enough detail in Kutner's open letter (and those Grindr pics) to identify this guy, if only through process of elimination. Get on it, Internet.

But, hey, even if the Internet sleuths fail us... this guy may wind up outing himself in the end. "[We’re] choosing to leave [him] anonymous," the say the editors at GAYRVA, "however we hope this message reaches [his] desk and [he'll] consider the words below if and when [he] have a chance to vote on LGBTQ related bills in the future."

If he casts another anti-LGBT vote, GAYRVA will out him. But if he pulls a 180 and suddenly starts casting pro-LGBT votes, he'll be outing himself. Checkmate either way.

And yes, I WILL be working to confirm the individual's identity.