Throughout juvenile court and custody issues the guiding principle is supposed to be that of "what is in the best interests of the child" - that is, apparently not the case in Mormon dominated Utah. This story (http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/10/meanwhile_in_utah) demonstrates yet again the potentially idiotic results that occur when religious views pollute the civil laws:
A woman that can’t care for her four children—she’s got a drug problem, the father is not on the scene—begged her uncle to take in her children. He’s already raising two children but he did the right thing and took in his niece’s four children—kids that range in age from 10 months to 11 years old. Enter the state of Utah. The man that took in his niece’s four kids is gay and lives with a male partner. The state of Utah wants to remove the four children from the home of Michael Gregg Valdez—he’s the uncle—and Michael Oberg and put them in foster care.
To the state, it’s a simple matter of the law, which says that to adopt or be a foster parent, you must be legally married or single and not cohabitating. Officials asked for clarification of a judge’s directive that Valdez have custody of the children, requesting that the court take custody or grant custody to the state’s Division of Child and Family Services…. The two men, both natives of Utah County, said they would love to get married, but voters passed a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage.
The men have been together for five years, both are natives of Utah, both are employed, and neither has a criminal history. The state will have to split the four siblings up if it succeeds in removing from their uncles’ home; it’s almost impossible to find a foster home that will take four children. A brave judge in Utah has so far bucked the state: Officials [requested] that the court take custody or grant custody to the state’s Division of Child and Family Services. On Friday, the courts took custody, then turned around and granted Valez temporary custody of the children. “The judge said, ‘I see absolutely no reason why the kids can’t stay where they’re at,’” Valdez said.
Under Utah law the men not only can’t serve as foster parents, they also can’t adopt. Finding foster parents for four siblings ranging in age from 10 months to 11 years is nearly impossible. Finding adoptive parents for a sibling group that large is utterly impossible. But the law in Utah is clear: These four children should be tossed into the foster care system, potentially separated from each other for the rest of their lives, and if their mother loses custody permanently, denied any chance of a stable home. Because it would be illegal to place these children in the care of a loving, stable same-sex couple that they’re related to.
I can only hope that the Judge will stick to his guns and do what is right for the children - leave them with their uncle and his partner!!!!!! It is sad that religious based zealotry would prefer to tear these children apart and perhaps leave them never seeing each other again. No, it is not sad - it is down right sick.
2 comments:
But...but...but... He's a good man. He sounds like a good dad-type-guy. But...
This one made me weep.
And, well, it should. A loving home can not be defined by gender. How many single parents are there? Is a father better than a mother to care for the child? That all depends. There are terrible fathers, as well as terrible mothers. This is an issue that requires an approach that focuses on child-rearing and the elements that make for a good home. There are so many of the topics on this blog that focus on the sexual orientation aspect of us all. This is one that needs to be addressed without regard to that. It is a more global issue -- what is good quality child rearing? A sexual relationship is a personal relationship. A parental relationship is much different. Can a same sex couple provide a nurturing and wholesome environment? Yes, indeed. Look at this family -- a most appropriate term. The adult (sexual) relationship seems in tact and in the bedroom where it belongs and the family relationship reflects love and understanding. There really should be a focus group or a study group where people can discuss and get to know first hand a family where the parents are gay. The epitome of understanding parents are people who help young people grow, explore and understand themselves as a person. It shouldn't come as a surprise that gay couples can (and should) raise straight children. Remember, it's not a choice. However, I'm not convinced the gay community does such a good job at showing the world the truth of the matter. We are so caught up in pushing the gay agenda and so against the straight fundamentalist mentality that it is counter productive. In the final analysis, it creates a very unclear picture of our ability to parent.If we want our relationships to be legitimately recognized, then we need to start focusing on families such as these and underscore the healthy aspects of them.
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