California Teen Bullied for Being Gay Commits Suicide

The death toll from this nation's homophobic society continues to grow. While things are perhaps better for LGBT teens than they once were, thanks to the efforts of Christianists and the pandering political whores in the Republican Party, gay bashing and bullying continue to be socially acceptable. In fact, the Christianists and Roman Catholic Church hierarchy believe they have the special right to make life a living hell for others who differ from them in beliefs and/or sexual orientation. The latest victim is Jeffrey Fehr who hanged himself in his family's home on New Years Day. I hope Tony Perkins, Maggie Gallagher, Don Wildmon, Rick Santorum, Don Wildmon, Newt Gingrich, Benedict XVI and so many other like them are pleased with the results f their unrelenting message of hatred. They in their own effort to keep homophobia alive and gays targets of unrestrained discrimination all helped to put the noose around Jeffrey's neck. Personally, it sickens me and underscores the fact that religion and supposedly "deeply held religious beliefs" are among the most vile, poisonous things on this planet. Here are highlights from the Sacramento Bee:

On a blustery Saturday morning inside a Granite Bay church, nearly 1,000 people gathered to say goodbye to Jeffrey Fehr. Men and women in dark clothing filled every seat and stood along a back wall. Teenagers wearing shirts with Jeffrey's image clustered in groups, crying and leaning into one another for support.

At a reception that followed his funeral, many spoke of a gifted young athlete who was funny, kind and compassionate. They called Jeffrey an inspiration and a mentor.
For Jeffrey's parents, Pati and Steve Fehr, the scene was stunning. "So many people gained strength from Jeff," his father said, looking out at the crowd. "The unfortunate part is that Jeff didn't realize it."

In the early hours of New Year's Day, Jeffrey hanged himself in the front entrance to his family's home in a tony Granite Bay neighborhood. He was 18 years old. Since that day, his parents have searched their hearts and minds for answers. Though Jeffrey, who was gay, had recently ended a relationship and had been treated for depression, they believe something more insidious put him on the path toward suicide. They are convinced that a lifetime of taunts and bullying contributed to his decision to take his own life.

"We will second-guess ourselves forever," his father said. "But we do know that for years and years, people knocked him down for being different. It damaged him. It wore on him. He could never fully believe how wonderful he was, and how many people loved him."

As early as the third grade, Jeffrey was the target of taunts, family members said. He had few friends and felt comfortable only when he was at home or on vacation with people he trusted.

"He would come home from school and cry," said Tyler, 21. "He would say he felt alone, that he wasn't accepted for the things he liked." It was in the sixth grade that people first started calling him "fag," the Fehrs said. "It broke my heart that he was abused that way," his mother said. They talked about how they could fix things.

His parents hoped high school would be a more welcoming place for Jeffrey. But his first two years were "pure hell," they said. . . . "It was just awful for him." One day as Jeffrey walked through the cafeteria, a student upended his lunch tray and laughed as others joined in, he told his parents. Another time, someone painted the driveway next to the Fehr home with gay slurs directed at Jeffrey. Day after day, he endured calls of "you're so gay" and similar taunts.

Jeffrey had many young fans, but the taunting never quite went away. Friends recalled ugly words shouted in student sections at games, and adults who said they wouldn't let their sons do something as "girly" as cheering. If others whispered about Jeffrey's sexuality or teased him, the girls told them to stop.

"He seemed to brush everything off," said his friend Megan Hurley, 16. "None of the comments made him want to change who he was. From the outside at least, it seemed like nothing penetrated him." . . . But inside, said family and friends, the years of harsh words may have created a wound that never quite healed.

Last Saturday, inside a reception hall with his son's image smiling from video screens, Steve Fehr fought tears as he spoke. He asked those gathered to "embrace diversity, be tolerant and do not bully." "A bully might say something and forget about it in 10 seconds," he said. "But people like Jeff never forget those words."

Stories like this one and the hate emanating from hate groups that euphemistically describe themselves as "family values" organizations and from politicians like Rick Santorum and Michele Bachmann make me think "what a nasty, sick person" when I hear some sanctimonious bigot blathering about being a Christian or accepting Jesus. If that's what being a Christian is, then I want no part of it.