I met my son for lunch today before he heads off on his latest adventure at the end of the week – hiking the entire Appalachian Trail, starting at the terminus in Georgia and heading north up through Maine. For readers who do not know, the Appalachian Trail is a continuous marked footpath that goes from Katahdin in Maine to Springer Mountain in Georgia, a distance of about 2,160 miles. As the map at left shows, one of the longest portions of the Trail is in Virginia, running up along the Blue Ridge Mountains. Along the way the Trail crosses six national parks, traverses eight national forests, touches 14 states, and crosses numerous state and local forests and parks. The Trail’s web site (http://www.appalachiantrail.org/site/c.jkLXJ8MQKtH/b.1423119/k.BEA0/Home.htm)indicates that it takes approximately 5 million footsteps to walk the entire length of the Trail. For the last year for which data is posted, about 29% of those who started out in Georgia made it all the way to Maine. Traversing it will be quite a feat and adventure.
Obviously, I would feel better in some ways if my son would go back and finish his four year college degree (he did two years at VCU and had good grades and a dean’s scholarship). On the other hand, I always did what was “expected” when I was his age – and for many, many years more – and it did not bring me happiness. Thus, I do believe that if my son has dreams of things he wants to do, now is the time to do them. He is 22, in very good shape and is wilderness savvy – one of his friends in Portland runs a wilderness survival training school, in fact – and has done much reading up on the Appalachian Trail, various groups that do expeditions, etc. As a parent, I will naturally worry about him, although he does plan on e-mailing us all from internet cafes that are available at points along the Trail and also setting up a new Flicker account where he can upload photos. If he does upload photos, I will post some here on the blog as he progresses along the Trail. He also plans on keeping a journal and can perhaps write a book or a blog about his experiences.
I am very proud of my son despite his marching to a different drummer at times. He is very good looking, extremely intelligent, and an altogether good person. Despite the messed up aspects of my marriage and my tortured years in the closet, I can honestly say that I have three wonderful kids and having them offsets the years of self-loathing and sense of failure I feel at times over the end of my marriage and my career path not being what it might have been. Lunch today was very enjoyable and I feel that my son knows I love him and that I support him in his endeavors. It is his life and he needs to live it in ways that make HIM happy. One should never live their life to meet the expectations of others – my son has figured this out at 22. It took me nearly three decades longer. I guess I am a slow learner. I love you Peter and good luck!!
Obviously, I would feel better in some ways if my son would go back and finish his four year college degree (he did two years at VCU and had good grades and a dean’s scholarship). On the other hand, I always did what was “expected” when I was his age – and for many, many years more – and it did not bring me happiness. Thus, I do believe that if my son has dreams of things he wants to do, now is the time to do them. He is 22, in very good shape and is wilderness savvy – one of his friends in Portland runs a wilderness survival training school, in fact – and has done much reading up on the Appalachian Trail, various groups that do expeditions, etc. As a parent, I will naturally worry about him, although he does plan on e-mailing us all from internet cafes that are available at points along the Trail and also setting up a new Flicker account where he can upload photos. If he does upload photos, I will post some here on the blog as he progresses along the Trail. He also plans on keeping a journal and can perhaps write a book or a blog about his experiences.
I am very proud of my son despite his marching to a different drummer at times. He is very good looking, extremely intelligent, and an altogether good person. Despite the messed up aspects of my marriage and my tortured years in the closet, I can honestly say that I have three wonderful kids and having them offsets the years of self-loathing and sense of failure I feel at times over the end of my marriage and my career path not being what it might have been. Lunch today was very enjoyable and I feel that my son knows I love him and that I support him in his endeavors. It is his life and he needs to live it in ways that make HIM happy. One should never live their life to meet the expectations of others – my son has figured this out at 22. It took me nearly three decades longer. I guess I am a slow learner. I love you Peter and good luck!!
3 comments:
Your son will have himself quite an adventure and I'm very envious as I have been with one of my younger male cousins and male cousin-in-laws who have hiked in and out of the Grand Canyon twice.
Even if I was younger and in shape, I wouldn't be able to do the Canyon as I suffer from Vertigo, even going by mule/horse isn't an option.
But someday after I have retired to Arizona and before I kick the bucket, one thing I plan on doing is going through the Canyon via an overnight rafting tour.
When your son gets to Connecticut, the trail will go through Macendonia State Park in Kent(camping allowed).
He will have some spectacular views of NY State and the valley NY State RT. 22 traverses when he gets to the top of the mountain (such as it is)in Macendonia.
That part of CT is beautiful (just north of Danbury via Rt. 7).
If memory serves me, he'll also be close to the Housatonic River in some spots of the trail.
When I was in the Boy Scouts, we hiked the Macendonia part of the trail.
Oh to be 22 again. Tell him if he hasn't planned to, to write a journal and as you said he will take photos.
You never know, there may be a book in the future for him
Long ago, in a body far far removed, I hiked a portion of the Appalachian Trail. I sure have let this body go to pot since then! I'm envious of his adventure, and wish him the best of the best. Kudos to you, dad, for letting him be who he is, allowing him to do what he needs to do for himself. I wonder how much of that he learned from your experiences over the last decade... To thine own self be true.
Never a truer word was spoken! Your support for him is exactly what he needs, well done. Let him be axactly who he wants to be and he will become the man you want him to be.
Just a thought...
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