There's been a good deal of debate and discussion across the blogosphere about the schism if you will within the LGBT community on tactics and where to go from here given that, in the view of many, the incrementalist approach seems to have hit a brick wall. Many - and I am one of them - accuse HRC and other groups who claim to be our "leaders" of having sold out the rest of us in order to maintain their "access" to the White House, remain on the cocktail circuit invite list, be named among Washington's best dressed, etc. As a result, instead of playing hard ball with politicians and others who block progress, these organizations provide cover for those who gladly take our money and our votes and then refuse to deliver on promises - Barack Obama, are you listening? Zack Ford has a thoughtful piece on his blog that deserves a reading. He's not tearing down the old guard, but definitely makes the case for rethinking strategy and tactics. Those who are frustrated about the failure to achieve anything significant during the nearly two years of the Obama administration should check it out.
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In my view, part of the problem lies in the fact that too many self-anointed leaders live in Washington, D.C., and more progressive states where much has changed. Unfortunately, for even more of us in states like Virginia, very little has changed except that now we (1) are not deemed mentally ill by mental health experts and (2) the state cannot prosecute us at will under the old sodomy statutes. Personally, I am NOT satisfied with so little progress. In looking at the recent wave of gay suicides, John Aravosis sums up what I deem to be the circustances rather well:
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I think a lot of people who aren't gay, and even many who are, like to think that we're all rich and live in big welcoming cities where being gay is about as big a handicap as being left-handed. We say we want our civil rights, but I think a lot of people think we've got things pretty good, and behind closed doors, they probably call us whiners too.
And I'm sure our lives are pretty good, and just as good as straight people's, except for the part about not being able to get married, have children in many states, keep a job - oh yeah, and that nagging desire to kill ourselves because so many of us grew up thinking we were horrible people who would never be loved, or find love.
I think it's this kind of attitude that leads people to lecture us about "keeping the long view in mind" with regards to getting our civil rights. I wrote in response, just yesterday, "to paraphrase Keynes, in the long view we're all dead."
Gay civil rights isn't a "social issue." It's our lives. A lot of us, myself included, grew up thinking we'd never see the age of 30 because we'd have to kill ourselves once people found out we were gay. A lot of people have no idea how hard it is to grow up being gay. To grow up thinking God made you wrong. Thinking you will never find love. Thinking your own family and friends will disown you once they know who you really are. And hearing the President of the United States - one of the "good" guys - say that you don't deserve the right to marry the person you love.
And when politicians make promises to us, then lecture us to "stop whining" because the other guy would hurt us even worse, it really hits a raw nerve. It suggests that they don't think our struggle is a struggle. They don't think it's as important as the "important" issues the country faces. It tells us that they think we're just another special interest, no different than the corporate lobbyist trying to get another tax break.
And I'm sure our lives are pretty good, and just as good as straight people's, except for the part about not being able to get married, have children in many states, keep a job - oh yeah, and that nagging desire to kill ourselves because so many of us grew up thinking we were horrible people who would never be loved, or find love.
I think it's this kind of attitude that leads people to lecture us about "keeping the long view in mind" with regards to getting our civil rights. I wrote in response, just yesterday, "to paraphrase Keynes, in the long view we're all dead."
Gay civil rights isn't a "social issue." It's our lives. A lot of us, myself included, grew up thinking we'd never see the age of 30 because we'd have to kill ourselves once people found out we were gay. A lot of people have no idea how hard it is to grow up being gay. To grow up thinking God made you wrong. Thinking you will never find love. Thinking your own family and friends will disown you once they know who you really are. And hearing the President of the United States - one of the "good" guys - say that you don't deserve the right to marry the person you love.
And when politicians make promises to us, then lecture us to "stop whining" because the other guy would hurt us even worse, it really hits a raw nerve. It suggests that they don't think our struggle is a struggle. They don't think it's as important as the "important" issues the country faces. It tells us that they think we're just another special interest, no different than the corporate lobbyist trying to get another tax break.
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Our enemies among the Christianists and professional Christian set are relentless in their lies and untruths and the LGBT community needs to be just as relentless in its push back and its demands that politicians keep their promises. Too many lives are being needlessly lost while our "leaders" argue for a take it slow approach. I pledge to do my best to push relentlessly for FULL legal equality.
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