UPDATED: In reaction to this post, I received an anonymous message from a reader which read in part as follows: I think you said it best when you have to be happy with yourself to be open to a relationship. I am closeted and that has not happened to me. I feel it never will, but that is my fault. My heart goes out to this individual and I hope at some point he/she finds happiness with themself. Coming out and finding self-acceptance and comfort with who one is is not an easy process. God knows I have been through my own private Hell along the way. Nonetheless, in my view, the cost and struggle is worth the liberation and happiness that are the ultimate prize.*
My blogger friend Michael at Gaytwogether has a beautiful post today on lovGood luck. e. Michael has had the wondrous good fortune of finding a sweet and wonderful man, Steven, who has given him the ultimate gift of selfless true love. What's amazing (if you have been following Michael's diaries) is that much as happened with me and my boyfriend, Steven appeared out of nowhere when Michael was not even searching for love. People often say that you find love when you are not looking for it, and in both our cases it was true. In fact, we have joked about our "parallel lives."
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A key element, however, in my opinion, is being happy with who you are and comfortable in your own skin. If you can achieve that balance - and God knows it took me a very, very long time to get to that point - others will sense it and, I believe, it makes you ever so attractive to others. If you are not happy with your self and positive and loving in your outlook, don't expect others to want to dive into your unhappiness. In addition, it is very important to recognize the difference between infatuation and love. There is a crucial difference. One lasts and the other does not have the substance to endure.
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Words cannot express how happy I am for Michael and Steven. I wish them every joy and happiness.
1 comment:
Thank you, my sweet wonderful friend. How could I not agree with your "key element", after all, there has been someone whispering this message of encouragement into both of our ears every night for over six months. One is known by the name of "Peter Pan" (a silly boy) and the other is the "Incorrigible Angel". What a spectaular trip we've both have taken together, and I so look forward to where we're going next.
With Love,
Your IA
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