End of the Line?

If this post is published, it will mean that I have either checked myself into a mental institution or had a fortuitous "accident." The last three and one half years have been a nightmare financial not to mention the divorce disaster. I have pretty much reached the point where I am to emotionally and mentally exhausted to keep swimming against the current and want to just stop struggling and let it carry me over the falls. In the event I resort to the latter course of action, I know that I will be failing my family, my children, the boyfriend and my readers - and for that, I am very sorry to let people down. I can only hope that someday they will understand what drove me to this point - and it is NOT being gay that was the cause - and hopefully the day will come when all citizens are treated equally and religious based bigotry doesn't cause some lives to be damaged and destroyed. As for the ex-wife, she will receive what she deserves - no money whatsoever.
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I cannot say how much blogging has meant to me since I seriously started this blog in April, 2007, and how much I have valued the friendships I have developed around the world. As for the boyfriend, my children and my family, I have left them all letters expressing my love and regret for things I might have done differently. If I cause them pain, I apologize and hope that one day they will understand. I especially apologize to my daughter Victoria, who has been so loyal and supportive of me, and the boyfriend without whom I would likely taken my life long before now.
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I hope that LGBT activist will keep up the good fight and that future generations will not be burdened with the hate, discrimination and abuse that some of us have known. I will leave the boyfriend the log-in information for this blog if I decide on the "permanent solution" so that he can continue the blog if he is so inclined. He is a sweetheart and I love him so much.