Timothy Kincaid has a great post at Box Turtle Bulletin which in my mind gives a wonderful review of the refusal of conservative Christians - even the well intentioned ones - to grasps and accept modern medical and mental health knowledge concerning sexual orientation. Namely, that sexual orientation is inherent and not a choice. Fortunately, some Christian denominations are coming to grasp this reality and as a result are becoming accepting of same sex relationships. Others sadly, continue to reject the truth - perhaps because they fear that admitting that the Bible is wrong about homosexuality being a sinful abomination, opens the door to the likelihood that it may also be wrong on other issues. Once this process begins, their entire house of cards belief system collapses and they are left confronting life without absolute certainty. Some it seems are too weak to contemplate this option and would rather go on condemning others in order to avoid insecurity. Here are some highlights from this lengthy but thoughtful post:*
With the growing openness of gay men and women and as they become more incorporated into the fabric of the culture, conservative Christianity has been challenged to rethink their position. For years the only visible response was “it’s a vile sin”. As gay people slowly became visible, up sprang vitriolic “family” groups dedicated to fighting for the civil subjugation of gay people and the denial of social equality or even basic civil rights.
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But over time, secular voices were joined by mainline Christians in calling such treatment barbarian and un-Christian. And some of the younger conservative Christians had a hard time aligning the “evil homosexual” image with those gay men and women they know. So a new face of conservative Christianity is arising calling for more tolerance and seeking to share a loving God with their gay neighbors, to welcome them and love them rather than loudly condemn them. And almost without exception, they get it entirely, completely, and miserably wrong.
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But what these Christians fail to see is that we do not see our sexual orientation in terms of behavior. We are not gay because we do gay things. We are gay because we are internally, inherently drawn in matters of romantic, emotional, sexual and spiritual attraction to persons of the same sex.
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The sins that this tolerant Christian sees God forgive in his life are based on his own behaviors; his failings are his own actions. But the sins that he sees God forgive in our lives are not behavioral, but inherent; our failings are intrinsic and will be present no matter what we do. And when gay folk reject this overture, as we do, they indignantly reply, “Well! I called myself a sinner, too! What more to you want?”
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[T]hey forgot one little part: he can wake up tomorrow and decide to stop being a cheating, lying, womanizing a$$hat, but I’ll still be gay. And the extra-special plan that God has for gay people? Is it a lifetime of celibacy? Perhaps it is never, ever, experiencing romance, flirting, a first date, or a kiss on the beach under the moonlight. Maybe a life of devotion to others, knowing that your last breath will not be with a partner. Being a wonderful uncle or sister or neighbor, but knowing this: God’s Plan is for you to never be the most important person in anyone’s life. And they wonder why we don’t leap at the opportunity.
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So here is my message to the conservative Christians who “have a heart for the gay community”: think about what you are saying and how crazy offensive it would be if directed towards anyone else. . . . We know that you really do think that our “sin” is so much worse than your own and we are not impressed when you lie and say that you don’t.
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